Reclaiming Life
by Kristen999
Summary: The Team try to help Nick recover after his abduction. Little does anyone know the true ramifications of this traumatic experience has had on everyone. Goes from the events in the episode to the days and weeks afterwards. Conclusion up
1. Chapter 1

Title: Reclaiming Life

Authors: Kristen999 and Shacky20

Category: Drama/Angst

Spoilers: Grave Danger

Disclaimer: All rights belong to CBS and all their fine writers. Please don't sue. This is just for fun.

Summary: The Team try to help Nick recover after his abduction and move on. Little does anyone know the true ramifications of this traumatic experience has had on everyone. Goes from the events in the episode to the days and weeks afterwards. This is a Nick-Greg-Warrick Friendship. There is drama, angst and even humor.

Notes: This story was written by both Kristen999 and Shacky 20. We spent a lot of time planning and writing this post GD story. Each chapter will be labeled by the author who penned it. Feel free to comment or leave feedback on this endeavor, if you have specific questions or comments be sure to direct to whomever the author is of the specific chapter.

Huge thanks to Sunset for taking the time to beta this huge work. Your swiftness and insight was much appreciated.

There have been tons of GD stories, and a ton of familiar ground has been covered. This is our attempt to try to come up with something as true to the show as possible. We focused our scope around Greg and Warrick and their friendship with Nick because of our feelings for these characters and to tell a more concise story. The rest of the team is featured.

Kristen999 Notes: I've never co authored a story with anybody before this has been a wonderful experience and I hope you enjoy the ride.

Shacky20 Notes: Wow, what a ride. This is my first multi chapter fic, let alone co-authored fic. To say I was shocked and ecstatic when Kristen asked if I wanted to co-author a post "Grave Danger" Fic would be an understatement. I only dabbled a little in slash between Nick and Greg and was truly honored she would ask me to write something like this with her. I have learned to much about writing from Kristen, and it has been hard work, and frustrating, and fun, and an adventure, and something I will always be very proud of having accomplished now it's completed. I just wanted to personally thank Kristen for giving me this chance. Hope you all enjoy this as much as we did writing it.

* * *

**Chapter 1 by: Shacky**

* * *

Why was he the one he in the A/V Lab instead of the other way around? Dumb luck he supposed. That's all Warrick could call it, as he obsessed about his current situation. One piece of paper that he handed to Nick sealed both of their fates that night. Now he sat here, watching his best friend on the screen try to fight for his sanity and life. Warrick didn't know how he could ever live with himself if Nick didn't make it out alive. All he could do was watch his friend struggle for breath in his glass prison, buried God only knew where.

He started to get confused, as he watched Nick's peculiar actions on the web cam. His friend was so scared, frightened like a small animal at night, when that bright floodlight came on. Nick always tried to scramble away, but there was nowhere to go. Warrick tried to imagine how bright and intrusive it must have been shining on him. To only be able to see dirt and dark surround him. Warrick had to keep turning the light on. It was his only way to ensure that Nick was still alive.

Nick's sudden intent worried and scared Warrick. What the hell was he doing with that bubble gum? All he knew was that Nick was agitated by the lamp and tried to shrink away from it. He saw Nick take the gum from his mouth and put it in his ears

"What are you doing Nicky?" Warrick asked his friend in the empty confines of the A/V Lab.

Fear flashed across his features as he saw Nick grab his gun and Warrick's eyes widened in fear. He sat rigidly at attention in his chair, ready to pounce at nothing but a computer screen.

'No No No' was going through his head. Nick couldn't do it, he wouldn't!

"What are you doing Nicky?"

"No! Don't do it Nicky!" He stood up quickly.

A million impossible thoughts raced through his mind as he tried to reason with his friend. If he screamed loud enough maybe Nick could hear him and sense his pleads. The bright light from the muzzle made him jump back suddenly.

"You Son of a Bitch!" Warrick screamed, the anger seeping through his voice, while he stared wide-eyed at the black screen.

What he couldn't hear was the laughter radiating from Nick's throat at his one small victory in this horrible game. All Nick thought about was that damn bright light was finally out. He simply laughed some more in his hollow prison.

Nick grabbed one of the green glow sticks left behind and lit it. He had no clue the kind of agony he had just put his friend through.

Warrick's eyes lit back up with unshed tears as he saw Nick's hauntingly eerie green reflection come back on the screen.

"You're still alive," he whispered with a smile on his face.

Of course he's still alive. Nick wouldn't give up on them that easy, not on himself either. Warrick knew Nick was still breathing and that's the only thing that mattered in the world right now, another reprieve. He's still hanging on. With that, the CSI stalked out of the Lab before he screamed.

Warrick tore out and muttered a soft apology to Archie after almost knocking him down.

He ran into the locker room for some kind of retreat, but there is no escape from this nightmare, especially for Nick. Warrick's thoughts drifted back to just a few hours ago. Nick had sat right there next him as he carried on about the escapades of his date from the weekend. No escape. That's all he could think about as he grabbed his locker door and yanked it open with more force than necessary.

The guilt-ridden criminalist stood there staring, memorized by the sight of his own locker. It was so small, so damn tiny. Warrick can't help but think back to his days of Junior High. When the bigger kids, the more popular ones, would put him in his locker. It only happened a couple of times. They would throw him in there and shut the door locking him inside. It was so cramped, so dark, and suffocating. He would scream and someone would always, always, come and open the door and get him out. It only lasted five minutes tops.

Now Nick was buried down in the ground somewhere for hours, screaming at the air, begging for help. But no one can hear his terrified pleas.

However, Warrick's head is filled with his screaming.

Warrick slammed his door shut. He finally gave in and fell backwards, luckily landing on the bench. Warrick held his face in his hands as he cried for his friend. Tears streamed down his face at his frustration in his own incompetence to get him out.

* * *

Greg wasn't as naive as most people thought he was. He understood how new he was to this CSI thing. He was officially a criminalist, but barely out of training. Now he was working on what he knew would be the biggest case of his life... ever.

Not only because it was 'one of their own', but it was Nick, one of his best friends. The guy who always took him seriously when no one else even gave him a second thought. Nick was the one who first encouraged him, instead of laughing at the notion that Greg Sanders, Geek Lab Tech, CSI wannabe, should get into the field. He also witnessed CSIs and cops with 13 to 20 years of experience feel as useless and helpless as he did right now. He knew these feelings weren't just because he was green. It was because they were up against a damn smart guy that left hardly a trail and had everyone chasing their tails.

As if you could call Nick a _case_. He couldn't do that because if he did then, it would make it too real. He would visualize Nick trapped in a small box with a bright light, and then he couldn't focus on his task at hand.

So, in the meantime it _was_ a case right now.

Currently the only thing he could do for Nick was to help find him. Greg had to sift through a box of body parts that belonged the bastard that did this to him. That somehow made it easier to look through the blood and pieces of this once human. It made it harder because this was the one person that knew all the answers. He felt no emotion looking at the fingers and bloodied bones and other various parts of the monster who took Nick away from them.

'Great, a tooth, like that was actually going to be able to tell him anything.'

Greg sensed the tension practically radiate off of Warrick's body. The ex-lab tech knew he couldn't understand how the older man felt. He had known Nick for about just as long, as the two pals. But the partners had worked side by side by for six years. Deep down Greg knew that Warrick felt responsible on some level for Nicky being down there. It was either that or the knowledge that Warrick could have been the buried just as easily.

He watched as Warrick tore off another sketch and crumpled it up and threw it down to the ground for the third time in twenty minutes. It landed next with the other useless discarded papers that were just adding up to another pile of dead ends. Warrick carried a big burden on his shoulders, having the knowledge of knowing that it could have been you must have been unbearable. Just as that thought flashed behind Greg's eyes, they lit up for the first time since they got that package at the lab.

"Hey guys, I found the trigger wire." Greg held up his bloodied prized piece, the excitement in his voice apparent of the glimmer that could not be contained. "Once we reassemble all of the components…"

"Maybe, maybe, maybe." Greg could hear the sarcasm dripping from Warrick's mouth.

"Maybe if we came up with of these damn maybes Nick would be alive!" His temper boiled over, as he kicked the bucket full evidence towards the direction of Greg's pile.

Any excitement or hope Greg had held for a moment flowed right out of him. His own anger at the situation brimmed to the surface as well. He could only keep his own composure for so long just like everyone else. Because he was busy searching through boxes of broken body parts looking for even the most minuscule thing. If he found anything...anything at all. Then he wouldn't have to think. Greg would be able to shove the thoughts about his best friend trapped somewhere underground in the vast desert that was Las Vegas, alone, scared, and slowly suffocating. The youngest CSI knew that Nick was just waiting for them to find. Yet, they were up here barely holding it together.

"Was that necessary?" He spat back toward his target, tensions running high on both sides at this point. He stood up ready to stand his ground and challenge the older CSI.

"Never mind the clothes, but look at the evidence." Greg shouted back.

"Damn!" was Warrick's barely whispered reply, while he threw the rest of his papers to the floor and stormed off.

Catherine who had sat inside the kidnapper's SUV processing, decided she had seen enough and it was time to intervene.

"Sorry Greg, I'll go talk to him." She walked off, leaving Greg standing there trying to reorganize his evidence.

As Catherine went up to Warrick, the senior CSI realized she'd never seen him so beaten down before. Warrick seemed as if it was all already over and they were just searching for a body.

"How are you holding up?" She asked, honestly concerned for her coworker.

"Huh, I'm not." Tears started to pool in his eyes as his solidly built defenses wore down.

"We flipped a coin for that trash." He said, trying to make her understand his aggravation.

Catherine fought to get the right words in to calm his ever-growing anxiety.

"Nick is not down inside of that box because of a flip of a coin."

"Cath, if that was me, I... I...would have… " And he brought his fingers up to his head letting her know with his gestures what his intentions would have been. That he would have already given up by now.

Catherine wouldn't believe that and she couldn't let Warrick either.

"Hey! I know you, and I don't believe that!" She tried anything to reach through the guilt and fear. Catherine truly believed that Warrick wouldn't give in that easily either.

"No." Warrick's words were spoken softly but forcibly. "You're wrong, I wouldn't have lasted this far. Cath, if something happens to Nick, if we don't bring him back in one piece…"

But that thought was left unfinished as an enthusiastic Greg interrupted them once again. Their excitement over a lead soon evaporated when they uncovered another dead end.

After they quickly got over the disappointment they realized the key piece of evidence they had just uncovered. The Prototype box. Nick was probably in its exact mate, only larger. They uncovered the rest and took everything back to the lab to see what they could hopefully decipher, if anything from the Plexiglas Hell they uncovered.

Nick was still buried somewhere out there.

* * *

Things began to happen quickly by some miracle. It was a horrible way to find out, but it was a small miracle in a way nonetheless. The three had learned of Nick's newest battle.

Ants. Fire ants to be more exact.

Sara came running in to the room telling the three of the discovery and they were all to meet in the evidence room immediately because this was there best chance yet to pinpoint where Nick may be buried out there. The atmosphere in the room among the whole team automatically changed and for the first time that night they felt they were ahead of the game. They had a real lead on to where Nick was. Slight hope was seen on the faces of the team, instead of constant despair.

* * *

All the clues had come together. The ant species, the miles on the SUV, the nursery Kelly Gordon had worked at.

Ten minutes and it would all be over. Greg looked at his own watch as he followed the rescue and police units speed towards their destination.

'God couldn't they drive faster? Ten minutes wasn't enough. But he wasn't gonna be this close to finally finding Nick to have time run out on them. No, that was NOT going to happen'.

Once they arrived, Grissom did what he did best. Give orders. He split up the team to cover the largest amount of ground in the quickest time. "All right, everyone fan out, look for loose soil, anything that might have been dug up recently."

Teams of people started searching everywhere in the area. Everyone carried flashlights and shovels to search the ground for any signs it had been disturbed.

Catherine held the web cam transmitter detector in her hand, knowing this could be the quickest way of locating the place where Nick was buried. She walked as fast as she could cover ground and still pick up any useful signal. All of a sudden her detector starting making small squawking noises.

"Hey, I'm picking up the web cam transmission."

That's all the team needed to hear to run into action. They started to follow Catherine's voice. The more she walked, the louder the signal got.

While picking up very strong signal, she literally fell over an air pipe, then looked up. The tracker started beeping wildly and Catherine fell to her knees and started digging through the dirt.

She came upon the web cam transmitter.

"This is it. I found it! It's here!" She screamed as loud as she possibly, to alert everyone where they needed to be.

"Nick hang on, Nicky!" She screamed down the air pipe praying that he can hear her. She wanted him to know that help was just minutes away.

Nick had no idea how close he was from being rescued. Not when he was fruitlessly clinging to whatever sanity he had left.

Ripped up pieces of shirt protecting his nose, shreds of his latex gloves plugged his ears. He desperately tried to hang on.

Warrick and other members of the rescue team grabbed their shovels. The whole time Warrick silently repeated to himself over and over in his head.

'One more minute Nicky, one more minute Nicky, we're here, we're here.' The CSI hoped he was convincing himself of that truth as well.

Grissom, Sara, Catherine, and Greg, all stood back and held their flashlights on the ground so the workers could see something. Greg had never felt so useless in his life. All he could do was hold a damn flashlight.

After digging for a couple of minutes Warrick heard a sound he had been dreading for exactly 90 minutes.

His watched beeped, letting everyone know that time was up for Nick. His air had just run out and they were now out of time. He stopped to stare at the blasphemous object for a couple of seconds, then looked up at the team who was staring back up at him. Expressions of defeat crossed their faces for the first time in an hour.

Not yet, no one was giving up yet. But no one knew how close Nick was to succumbing to the end of his will power. Warrick immediately regained his resolve and started to dig faster. He threw dirt every way he could. The criminalist had no idea at the exact same time, his friend just two feet below him, was reaching for his gun.

Nick realized it was over, and decided it was better for a quick death than to slowly suffocate. He looked at it carefully, cocked it, and placed the muzzle squarely under his chin with a shaking hand.

"I hit something!" Warrick cried out, excitement emanating from his voice at the discovery.

He threw his shovel to the side and fell to his knees. Warrick started moving the loose soil on top of the box away quickly with his hands.

After several agonizing moments his efforts revealed a frightened and shaking Nick Stokes; with his gun firmly planted under his chin, his finger ready to pull the trigger.

"Hey, hey! We got you man! Nicky hold on there." Horrified that the weapon was posed to be fired, he shouted." Hey, put that thing down, put that down. We got you! Hang in there!"

Nick finally understood that the sights before him were real. His friends were here finally...his brain could barely comprehend it.

He reached up, out of the box with trembling fingers. Then Nick pounded on the interior of his prison as he sought his escape. If he could touch someone, then he knew things were indeed real. He was cried so hard from the pain of the bites, the stress of the confinement, and struggled with the reality that he wasn't going to die! He could barely see, and was hysterical with tears and fear.

Greg wanted to fall to his knees at his fellow CSIs words. He was filled with relief that they had actually found Nicky in time. The younger man was almost stricken over the thought that in maybe another thirty seconds it would have been too late. Nick was ready to give up, out of air, out of time, and out of hope.

But he didn't ...Nick had held steadfast. Greg was tense with worry; his friend was still trapped in that box. The ex-tech could hear him scream to get out. The frantic man was pounding on the box. It took an enormous amount of patience for Greg to stand there and let the rescue workers do their jobs.

"We need that fire extinguisher. Get that fire extinguisher here now." Warrick belted out to anyone who was listening.

Upon hearing the command, Greg burst into action, finally feeling like he could do something besides stand idly by. He could do something to help end this nightmare. He ran to the truck and undid the extinguisher as fast as he possible could. He arrived back at the glass box in a flash, seeing Nick for the first time.

Greg swallowed the nausea that rose in his throat. He had a job to do finally, kill these damn ants and get them off of Nick before the caused any more damage.

Warrick took his shovel and slowly pried the corners off of the box giving Greg room to get the extinguisher in, while giving Nick some well needed oxygen.

"Short bursts Greg, don't suffocate him, just kill the ants." Grissom directed. Greg had to do this correctly; it would be horrendous if he ended up hurting the criminalist with his efforts.

"Hang on, we're gonna kill those ants, OK?" Warrick tried to comfort his terrified friend, who just wanted out of that damn box.

All of a sudden Catherine came running over, her voice horrified.

"Get out of the hole, it's rigged to blow, the box is ready to explode!" She screamed at them all.

"Are you kidding me?" Warrick couldn't believe what he was hearing.

After everything they had been through to get here. They had finally found Nick, had him in their grasp, and now they were told to back up.

No way. It wasn't going to happen.

"Get out of there now!" Catherine bellowed again, fear in her voice for the whole team again.

"I'm not leaving without Nick!" Warrick declared unwavering.

Catherine tried to explain so Warrick would understand the severity. "There are charges under the box."

Warrick bowed his head in defeat once again. They had been so close. How could they be literally within arms reach, just to be yanked away?

"Warrick, Catherine is right. Get out of there now. I know what we are going to do." Grissom had already formed a plan as soon as he heard about the charges.

Now he only had to calm down his charge long enough to implement the plan.

Warrick looked warily at Grissom, then back down at a Nick who was still screaming for help. His muffled, anguished pleas bellowing from below. The poor man must have thought his screams were being ignored by deaf ears.

Warrick knew he had no choice but to leave his friend for the moment. He had to work with the team to make sure those charges didn't go off, because he didn't come all of this way to watch his friend get blown up in front of him.

"We need 200 lbs of dirt over here now!" Grissom was once again barking orders again. "And we are gonna use that backhoe to get it." He pointed toward the direction of the object and the rescue workers went into action turning the machine on and getting ready to fill the hole.

Nick could not understand what was going on above him. He knew they were there. He knew they had finally found him and were going to save him. Then everyone started walking away. He started pounding harder and harder and screamed louder for someone to help him.

Where were they going? Why were they leaving him?

Grissom could hear and see the fear and desperation in Nick's actions. The younger man obviously had no clue what was happening and felt abandoned. He climbed on top of the box to try to make Nick understand.

"Nick can you hear me? Its gonna take us a minute to get you out of there." He tried to reassure him.

The hysterical man still thrashed around weakly as he begged for a release.

"Nick."

"Nick," Gil tired again to gain his attention.

His CSI was too wracked in his inner trauma; he was not hearing his command.

"Pancho! Listen to me!"

At the use of his childhood nickname, Nick suddenly quieted down and listened to Grissom. Somehow he knew his life lay in this man's hands. Nick tried to remain calm for the older man...to prove his worth one more time.

"Put you hand on my hand." Grissom pleaded and he laid his sprawled hand above Nick.

Nick could see through his glass tomb. He did as he was told and put his hand up against his superior's. He was so close to feeling the contact he had been so desperately seeking.

"Good, Good Nicky. There may be explosives under the box, probably set on pressure switches."

At this latest piece of news, Nick lay his head back down and shook his head from side to side in disbelief. How much was he supposed to endure?

"We need to equalize your body weight before we can pull you out." Gil took a much-needed breath. "Okay, Pancho, nod your head if you understand me."

Nick ever so slowly nodded his head, to let his boss know he comprehended what he was being told. Upon seeing this, Grissom stood back up and turned to give the last of the instructions.

"OK we're gonna use the dirt to equalize his weight, I need a rope and a carabiner."

People went to work getting the last of the supplies to pull their team member out of there. They were this close to saving Nick, and this small set back would not stop any of them.

Grissom turned back to the box to speak to Nick one last time.

"All right Pancho, we're gonna open the lid and get you out, but we need you to stay laying down. Or else you're gonna blow us all up. Do you understand that?"

The weak nod was there, but the supervisor had to be sure. "Do you promise?"

Nick gave a subtle nod of understanding.

"Pancho, say I promise." Grissom was hoping to give the young man something to hold on to, bring him back to this reality again.

"I promise." Nick cried out, tears once again flowing freely down his already reddened face.

Catherine started giving directions to the director of the backhoe to come towards the hole where Nick was still trapped.

"Nick, now don't move," Grissom and Warrick slowly pried the lid off the box, their ears filled with the soft sounds of their sobbing coworker.

With trembling hands Nick reached out for any human contact he could find. He was barely coherent with an overwhelming desire for comfort.

"I got you." Grissom said to Nick who had clutched his arm.

"Warrick," Nick's hoarse voice croaked out as his other hand reached for his partner.

Warrick put his hand down on Nick's chest giving him more contact. His partner tried to quiet the traumatized man. "Stay still, OK man? Just stay still."

"OK OK," Nick tried to take several deep breaths. He had to calm himself down a bit.

The rest of the team members were relegated to observers forced to watch all of this play out. Each of them was ready to pull their friend out as soon as directed. One more step to take before Nick was freed from his glass prison. Greg watched Grissom and Warrick. The younger CSI wished he could help more, but knew that right now, staying back and letting them calm down Nick was the best thing he could do.

"Bring that over here." The backhoe was directed over the hole in the ground, its life saving dirt ready to pour. Grissom attached the carabiner and rope to Nick's belt buckle.

"OK, Pancho, I want you to close your eyes and hold your breath... Ready... NOW!"

And with the order, Nick Stokes was covered with 200 lbs of dirt after being trapped for 24 hours underground.

"Ready NOW!" Grissom shouted to his team and they pulled on that rope as if everyone's life depended on it. That effort

Nick was literally brought flying out of the hole as the charges went off. He landed safely away from the explosion. The CSI laid there trembling, too scared to move, until the rescue workers came and got him.

After Nick was loaded into the ambulance, Warrick and Catherine, climbed in behind him and the doors were shut. The ambulance drove away with Nick tucked safely inside, finally freed.

The team stood there watching them pull away, Ecklie, Grissom, Sara, Brass, and Greg all stood silent. They had to allow everything to settle in. They had done it. The team had found Nick.

It was barely in time and he was barely alive, but they had come through. As soon as the ambulance was out of sight, the gravity of the situation hit Greg after holding it together after all this time. He fell to his knees, bringing his hand up to his face and sobbed for his friend.

TBC...


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 by: Kristen

* * *

The bomb exploded and propelled Nick into the air. He felt the heat sizzle his back for the briefest of moments, till he was slammed into the ground. It was a good thing that there was not more explosives behind the blast, or the CSI would have broken his back from such force.

Nick lay sprawled out on a landscape of rocky soil. His entire body shook from his horrendous ordeal. At first he could not hear anything. His ears still rang from the explosion, but then he felt it.

Human contact.

He was out...no longer trapped. It wasn't a dream or a cruel hallucination. Nick heard the worried voices of his colleagues...his friends. Nick managed to roll over to his side, despite being told to keep still. He'd be damned, if he stayed face down, breathing in dirt.

Dust still filtered down from the air. Dozens of people swarmed the area. Police gathered around in a weird version of a circle. Each officer tried to get a glance at the fellow colleague each of them tried so hard to save. Most of them stood back, giving room to the crime scene investigators that surrounded their coworker. The sounds of an ambulance in the background could be heard. It was the only thing to break the sullen silence that seemed to have descended over the family of CSIs.

Nick's broken and half-croaked cries, drifted throughout the night. Grissom, Catherine, and Warrick encircled him.

Sara, Greg, Ecklie and Brass stayed close.. too stunned...too relived to budge.

Nick trembled uncontrollably. He tried to reach out to someone, and both Grissom and Warrick immediately took his shaking hands. Grissom gently stoked Nick's hair, and wiped away the dead remains of ants that still lingered on his face. The young criminalist was unable to contain his emotions, he cried, tears steamed down his face. His gaze was went back and fourth between the two men who leaned over him. It was like he could not pick either of them to lock eyes with, as he was overcome with anguish.

Warrick never let go of Nick's hand. He leaned over his ear and whispered calming things. "Nick, you're safe man. It's all right, I promise. Shhhh, everything's fine."

Warrick was unable to control how his voice faltered, he sniffed and kept back his own grief for the sake of his best friend.

"Get me a jacket." Grissom ordered. Ever the collected one, the supervisor wanted to help prevent shock.

The supervisor turned around to search for his request. Nick felt the absence of the man, and instantly tried to curl up on himself. Instinctually all he wanted to do was get into a fetal position. The shakes were getting worse and it was as if the criminalist was slipping into the throws of an emotional meltdown.

Warrick saw his friend begin to collapse in on himself. Reacting quickly, he grabbed Nick's shoulders and pulled the other man close to him. Warrick Brown did not care if every eye in the department was on him. He wrapped both arms around Nick and gently hugged him. Warrick allowed himself a long, steady breath.

Nick was alive.

"Its all right, bro." Warrick felt his own face wet with moisture.

Sara went to Gil's side, heavy coat in hand. Grissom took the offered item and covered his shivering CSI with it. Grissom adjusted the garment, so it would not slip off the criminalist. Nick's head was resting against Warrick's chest, and the supervisor saw the CSI stare at him. With great difficulty, Nick held out his other free hand, and Grissom took it in his own.

Catherine came over with a damp cloth that she gathered from on of the search and rescue guys. She gently cleaned away the dirt and grime off of Nick's face.

Nick's sobs quieted and remained somewhat collected till the ambulance pulled up and the EMTs sprang into action.

Warrick moved up further in the ambulance to allow room for Catherine. There had been no arguments about procedures from the EMTs. This was a very special case. Warrick continued to hold Nick's hand as they loaded him in. Nick squeezed back hard, as if the other CSI was a life line. Nick's fingers trembled and his whole body shook. None of it mattered. Warrick held on.

The criminalist became the anchor to humanity for the overly distraught man. Warrick touched Nick's shoulder as he quietly became unglued. The medic began to give Nick oxygen. When the mask was placed over his face, it just seemed to be a natural reaction to fight him.

"Its, okay parnter..let em give you some more air. " Warrick encouraged, when the medic looked over at him for help.

Nick was at risk of hyperventilating, his breathing had been rapid and irregular. He was sweating bullets and his eyes were glassed over in a daze. It was obvious that he was struggling to calm down and relish in his rescue. However, he'd only managed a few shaky, deep breaths, when the panic would begin again.

The medic kept the Forensics' jacket over his patient for a sense of security and to help continue to battle shock. A much needed IV had been inserted in the his right arm. The EMT tried to avoid the angry swelling of ant bites, but that was near impossible. The CSI's vitals were closely monitored as the worried paramedic tried to keep things under control. After instructions from the hospital, the EMT gave Nick a shot of Epinephrine to help combat the poison from the ant bites.

Catherine snaked her hand under the heavy jacket and touched Nick's leg. She hoped the combined contact from her and Warrick would continued to aid and relax her friend. She used her other hand to wipe away the tears that all ready stained her face. Nick was still shaking, his legs lurched as if hit by spasms, while his arms still buzzed uncontrollably despite his best efforts.

The ride was entirely too long. Maybe a dozen cop cars, and other vehicles belonging to the lab raced after it. When Nick was unloaded and rushed into the ER, things became a storm of chaos.

* * *

Nick's arrival and the particular circumstances surrounding his ordeal had been communicated to the emergency room staff. Rules were broken again as Catherine and Warrick ran alongside the gurney as it was directed to a trauma room.

It was the extreme bright white light overhead that started it. Nick couldn't shield his eyes with all the bustle of actively around him. The quietness of the ambulance ride was now shattered by too much stimuli for a man who had just been shut off from outside sensations for the last twenty-four hours. The safety of his jacket was removed and there were so many damn voices shouting all around him.

Nick tried to keep from loosing it all together. The intensity of the light overhead, just reminded him of that damn bulb that had tortured him by his feet when he was inside that Plexiglas hell. He tried to drape his left arm over his face to block the intrusiveness. Despite his efforts otherwise, it was gently put back along his side. His mind flooded with uncontrolled fear, when Warrick's hand slipped away, and he was left at the mercy of strangers.

His training kicked in, the rational thoughts told him that these people were just trying to help. However, all those nice and neat ordered ideas were not in control of his mind right now. Nick had lost his tenuous connection to all that was real and plunged back into his nightmarish world. Then the panic started all over again.

"N-nnno," he stammered, and weakly lashed out to find his partner.

Warrick tried to grab Nick's hand but was pulled away.

"Let go of me!" He yelled. "He needs me!"

Warrick brushed past angry doctors who were just trying to work on his partner. He glared at the older head physician. "You know the situation here, let me by." He growled.

The ER doc nodded, and Warrick grabbed Nick's flaying hand again, instantly calming him down. "I'm right here, buddy. Not goin' anywhere."

Warrick planted himself right beside Nick as a permanent fixture, whether or not the doctors wanted him there.

The lead trauma doctor knew this was a special matter, but he sighed anyway. The older man looked at his team of residents. "What we got people?"

"BP's 60/40, pulse 140, his sats are 93." One of the nurses rattled off as she replaced the EMTs oxygen mask with one of their own.

Nick concentrated on evening out his breathing, but it was nearly impossible. He still quivered, despite some attempts from the nurses who talked sweetly to him. His skin felt like it was on fire. The pain from the ants had slowly morphed to numbness, but now it felt like his skin was crawling all over again.

He squeezed Warrick's hand harder.

"Let's get these clothes off him, and look at these ant bites." The sympathetic doctor leaned over his patient. "Mr. Stokes, do you have any allergies to insect venom?"

It was so hard for him to focus on the man's question. Nick shook his head no, his throat was too dry, he just couldn't speak. Just the mention of those creepy crawly things caused him to wiggle around. His shirt was being cut away along with his jeans. Nick's exposed and eaten away body felt like it was on view for everyone to gawk at. He closed his eyes. How was he ever going to face any of his coworkers normally again? The Texan turned his head towards his partner, begging him with his eyes to please ignore what he was witnessing. He strained his neck and searched out Catherine as well. A nurse quickly covered him with a sheet, relieving him of just a bit of his anxiety.

Catherine remained huddled in the corner as she tried to stay out of everyone's way. She gasped as her friend's clothes were stripped, a blanket draped around his waist to give him some dignity. His arms were covered with hundreds of swelling bites. There wasn't a patch of skin on his arms that were not swollen.

The rest of Nick's body had been spared somewhat. It seemed that despite his ordeal, his shirt had remained tucked into his jeans. His stomach and chest had bite marks, but it wasn't a sea of irritation like his poor arms. His thighs had been spared somewhat. The little critters had managed to go under his jeans and seemed satisfied at chopping away at his lower legs.

The head physician called over his shoulder. "Lets give him 5 mg of Diazem."

The doctor looked over at the other CSIs. "We're giving him something to help relax him."

The physician looked at a female resident. "Let's give him 20 MG of Deltasone, for the inflammation, 20MG of Diphenhydramine, and 40 MG of Ibuprofen, on board as well."

Nick was injected with a number of drugs to combat the insect venom, as well as anti-inflammatories and pain medication. The sedative hit the CSI's system, and his hand slipped out of Warrick's.

The criminalist stepped back towards Catherine as the nurses started to apply cool compresses to Nick's arms and face. The head physician glared at the investigators and knowing they had dozens of people anxiously waiting a progress report. Both of them left, as the staff continued to tend their friend.

* * *

The lobby emptied out a bit. A few hours ago it was littered with police officers, lab people, and criminalists. As much as Conrad Ecklie was proud of the lab's support. It wasn't going to do anyone any good to hang around and clog up Desert Palms. The Director huddled everyone together and thanked them for their efforts. He then kindly asked them to leave after promising them that they would be kept informed of the progress made here tonight.

Ecklie wandered the halls almost adrift and somehow stumbled into the corridor that held the remnants of the old graveyard shift. Sara Sidle spoke in hushed tones with her boss, Gil Grissom. Warrick Brown and Greg Sanders looked entirely too deep in thought. Each criminalists would let their eyes drift over towards a door that was closed shut.

Ecklie felt like an intruder somehow, but he was going to find out how one of his employees was doing. He wasn't the cold-hearted bastard that everyone perceived him to be.

All four CSIs turned around at his approach. They stared at him, as if they were studying his intent.

Grissom walked up to the director and nodded politely. "Conrad."

"How's Stokes?"

Warrick Brown seemed to stiffen at the question. Greg just stared back down at the floor. Sara, who went by her boss's side, seemed to shiver slightly.

Gil regarded the man in front of him somewhat stoically. "He's settled into a room. His doctor is with him right now."

The director looked around. "Where are his parents?"

"They were pretty upset. Nick's father took his mother to her hotel to try to settle her down. They are both very exhausted." Sara replied, her own weariness present in her voice.

Ecklie nodded. "And Catherine?"

Warrick looked at his superior. "They didn't want to further sedate him till he was given another examination. He asked that we leave."

The director looked a bit baffled, as if the explanation didn't quite sink in.

Warrick shook his head frustrated. "He freaked."

The rest of the group seemed to find interesting points on the wall, or the ceiling to study.

The lab director's eyes dropped, his mouth became a thin line.

Warrick folded his arms and leaned his back against the wall. "Cath went back in at his doc's request."

The door opened, and the same physician from earlier appeared. The group of criminalists gathered closer and the doctor smiled wanly. "I don't have to remind you people about hospital policy concerning immediate family. I spoke to his parents earlier after he was admitted, but they gave me permission to speak to all of you."

The doctor cleared his throat, hoping the group would give him a little space. No one really had the energy to move out of the way, so the physician resigned himself to the fact these people were on the end of their rope.

"Mr. Stokes is doing fairly well. He's exhausted and needs rest. A nurse will be in shortly to give him something to help with that. He can't seem to fall asleep without the aid of a sedative, which to be frank, isn't quite surprising."

The doctor took a deep breath, it would seem he had quite a captive audience. "We're replacing his fluids. I want to monitor him for several more days and keep an eye on those bites. The level of toxions will be watched very closely as we contiune to montior any possible damage to his heart."

The doctor watched four worried people, pale a little bit further. He cleared his throat. "Mr. Stokes had an allergic reaction to the insect venom. Normally this takes place after a previous reaction, but his body just couldn't tolerate the sheer amount of bites that it received. We used subcutaneous injections in the trauma room and the rest are being given intravenously.

He's responding well to the medication. With the extent of the bites on his arms especially, I want to make sure they do not get infected."

"That's good. " Greg responded softly.

The doctor looked around. "I had a psych consult done before he was settled. Mr. Stokes is not a danger to himself or to others." The older man gazed around. "Do you have a plan for when he goes home?"

The criminalists were quiet. It is obvious that the overly stressed and exhausted group has not thought that far ahead.

"Well, I suggest that someone stays with him for a while. I'm sure you have your own therapists. Our department head was adamant that he starts seeing one right away."

"Its mandatory." Conrad Ecklie nervously looked around as four sets of eyes stared at him. "We'll make sure he gets all the best care possible." The director amended

The physician stuffed his hands into his pockets. "He also said in Mr. Stokes' current state of mind, that someone should be with him at all times for his first few days at home. I have other rounds to make. Please keep your visits brief, no more than two people at a time."

With that last order, Nick's doctor left his coworkers with many decisions left to be made.

TBC...

* * *

Author's notes: I'll let Shacky make comments to people when I post her next chapter. Just want to say that all stories need abeginning. As stated in the summary, this was going to start from events in the eppy, then go foward. We wanted to kind of establish thoughts from those chracters. From now on this story takes place after the events. Hope you enjoy.

I had to break tis chapter up, so the next one will be mine as well.

Take care- Kristen999


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 by Kristen**

* * *

Catherine felt the warmth of his fingers, the subtle pulse in his wrist. Nick's eyes were closed, but she knew he wasn't sleeping. His breathing was finally a bit more even, but that fluctuated depending on if he started to drift off. Then his breath would hitch in his throat, and his eyes were fly open. He would cry out or start to sob uncontrollably. He's adjust his grip with hers, his hand never left her entwined fingers.

Nick insisted on lying on his side, mumbling something about being on his back for too long. Catherine wanted to gently stoke his arms, but they were wrapped in light, gauze to keep the CSI from scratching at his irritated skin. She thought with all the medications that he was on, that they would certainly have knocked him out. But, Nick was fighting it... Battling the darkness.

The door opened and Warrick entered the room. His usual confident stride was replaced with heavy, downcast, footsteps. He took the chair next to hers. Nick eyes opened at half-mast and followed the movement somewhat unfocused. Then as if his lids were too heavy, they slowly drifted close again.

Warrick adjusted his weight in the chair, causing it to creak. The room was dim; it took them several tries to get the correct amount of light in the room, before Nick was comfortable enough with the level of brightness. Warrick nibbled on his bottom lip and looked over at his boss.

"How's he doin'?" His voice was hushed, as if he might disturb the other man.

Catherine rubbed her thumb along the inside of Nick's palm. "He's in and out." Catherine coughed slightly, as her scratchy voice grated her ears. "He won't say anything. He just starts to shake and I try to calm him as best as I can."

The door swung open again and a nurse with dark black hair entered as stealthily as possible. She nodded at the two people in chairs and took out a syringe and injected something in the criminalists' IV.

"Hummmph...w-what's that?" Nick asked hoarsely, his voice worn away by too much stress.

"Something to help you sleep, dear." The nurse patted Nick's shoulder and exited the room as swiftly as she entered.

Several minutes ticked away in an eerie silence. Warrick rested his elbows on his knees, counting the numbers of lines in the floor. It seemed to be the only thing to take away too many dark images that seemed to fill his mind of the last few hours. He closed his eyes, content to listening to everyone's breathing. His back was tight with tension, and he really wanted a nice hot shower.

After a couple of minutes he felt a hand on his back, then two, as a set of thumbs tug into his taunt muscles. Warrick allowed fingers to dig deep into his shoulders and with an exhale, he lifted his heavy head.

"Nicky's asleep. His hand finally relaxed." Catherine whispered to her partner's unvocalized question.

Warrick looked over at his best friend. Nick's body wasn't tense, the lines around his eyes were not as pronounced. His chest in and exhaled in a normal rhythm for the first time all night.

"We're gonna take shifts staying with him. One day a week, till he's all right." Warrick explained of the plans discussed outside this very room.

Catherine pulled back some of the hair that slipped down her face. "I figured on something to that effect."

"Yeah," was Warrick's strained response.

Catherine kept her hands on her colleague's back and rested her chin on his shoulder. She let her arms drift down, and Warrick captured her hands in his. They remained that way for a long time, till each of them adjusted their seats and waited for morning to approach. Neither had any plans of leaving Nick alone this night.

* * *

Four days of his life had been spent at the hospital. It was a whirl winded blur of flowers, cards, and endless streams of well wishers. Most of the time Nick had been in a fuzzy fog of heavy medication and sedation. Tons of staff members from the crime lab had stopped by, but he couldn't recall many faces. His team had been a permanent fixture in his room. He was never left alone except for a few rare instances. His parents had flown back, despite their desire to stay. There was huge trial that could not be pushed back any further.

Now he was home and a part of him really was kind of weary of all the attention. It was an endless internal struggle. His mind was in constant state of flux. Nick had used his skills and training to endure and stay alive. He didn't give in to the temptation of taking the easy way out. Until of course the fan had stopped and he was left with only several minutes of slow agonizing torture. He felt his pulse race at the thought of how close he came to pulling the trigger. Never in his life did he ever imagine that he would put his own gun to his chin. He could still feel the muzzle dig into his throat.

Nick had been told to his face countless times how strong and courageous he was. The words 'will power' were echoed by his friends, and he smiled sheepishly every time. He believed it to some extent. The CSI had been taught well and cherished life as much as anyone.

When he arrived back home, he had developed a plan. Endure...just like every time. If he felt a twinge of fear, just push it back down deep with all his other dark and twisted feelings.

Warrick, Greg, Sara and Grissom were all sitting in different parts of his home. Each one would glance up at him, as if trying to remind themselves that he was actually alive. Then they would dart their eyes to something else and he would feel slightly uncomfortable.

Warrick didn't say much on the car ride over here. It seemed like the art of casual conversation had been lost and Nick was left to stare out the window and relish all his vast surroundings. He refused any help from his friend, even though his movements were slightly sluggish and a bit clumsy. Nick didn't know why, it wasn't like he had been physically injured in any major way.

It seemed that every step took more effort than usual. The box had zapped him of his strength and he felt weak and tired all the time. Nick sat on his sofa, his energy level near fumes, but he fought any urges to go to get some rest. No, that was something he still had a hard time coming to terms with. He felt a sudden tightness in his chest whenever the idea of sleep entered his mind.

Greg and Warrick pretended to watch television. Grissom spent time wandering aimlessly around his townhouse. Gil's eyes took in every detail, as if by scanning the contents of his home, the older man would gain some valuable insight into the person who lived here. The entomologist didn't seem very comfortable in this semi-social setting. Nick didn't blame him.

It didn't matter what each team member was doing to occupy their time. Nick felt their eyes on him as he sipped on a cup of tea that Sara had made him. He didn't own anything herbal. This reminded him to take stock of his groceries. It seemed Sara went shopping for him as a way to take her mind off the events that lead them all to this little gathering.

The object of his thoughts drifted over and Sara quietly settled next to him. "Grissom and I are on in the next hour. I have pizzas in the fridge and made some homemade soup."

Sara spent more time talking at his chest then looking at him in the eyes. Nick got the sinking suspicion that if she did manage to make eye contact with him, then she might falter somehow. This just made him nervous.

"Thanks, Sara," he said softly.

Nick grabbed her hand, until her eyes meet his. "For everything." He rubbed her knuckles softly. His throat tightened. "I'm here now. I'm not goin' anywhere and I don't plan on it anytime soon."

Sara quickly took him into a quick embrace. She hung her head over his shoulder and let her fingers drift into his hair. Then just as suddenly, she bolted up. "I need to get a head start on some paper work." She said, her clumsy excuse hollow.

Sara didn't even say good-bye to the others and quickly let herself out.

Nick sat dumbly on his couch. The Texan stared down at his hands and studied the pink and agitated flesh. He resisted the urge to scratch the fiery skin. Nick could still feel tiny little legs make their way up his legs and chest. It was even harder with his arms. Hundreds of bites burned warmly underneath the ointment and gauze. Nick studied his limbs and relished a tiny victory. His hands were still and motionless for once.

He was in control right now, no one else. Nick felt one of his prescription bottles in his Jean's pocket. He fished it out to read the label. He had several medicines to battle infection and inflammation from the fire ants.

This one was different. He fiddled with the smooth brown plastic as he stared at the instructions. It was some kind of anti-anxiety medication. He was supposed to take this twice a day for the first week home. If that wasn't enough, he also had sleeping pills and even an anti depressant. Nick thumbed the cap, causing a slight clicking noise.

Nick had seen what these types of medications did to you. They dulled the senses and made you groggy. He wasn't about to lose control or let his guard down again. If he had been more aware of his surroundings at that trash dump, maybe he would have overpowered his attacker and saved everyone a ton of grief. Or maybe it wouldn't have happened at all. He chastised himself.

He gritted his teeth and pocketed the meds. He didn't want to take them. They weren't needed.

He glanced up to see his friends look his way with concern. Nick didn't know how long he had been lost in thought.

"I'm fine guys. None of you have to worry about me freaking out anymore." He calmly explained to them.

Nick smiled. He was out of the box. There wasn't any reason to dwell on it anymore.

Grissom was next to walk over to him. Nick wasn't sure what to expect. The supervisor went over to his kitchen counter and picked up a brown paper bag. "There are some herbs in here that will help with the itching and inflammation."

Gil handed Nick a jar that filled with what looked like spices and dead leaves. The criminalist furrowed his brow. "I'm supposed to eat these?"

Grissom looked at him quzzingly, and shook his head sadly. "No, Nick. You use these in a warm bath. It'll soothe your skin."

Nick blushed slightly when he saw Warrick and Greg glance over. "Uh, Grissom, I don't take...ah ...baths."

Grissom fixed the CSI with had to be the teacher to pupil expression. "In this case, I'd make an exception."

"Use it with Mr. Bubble." Greg said in a teasing way to lighten the mood.

Nick fixed the spiky haired CSI with a 'I'll kill you' stare. The younger man quickly went back to watching the basketball game on TV. Warrick just snorted, it was the first time Nick had seen the solemn man out of his melancholy mood.

Nick studied the mason jar. "Thanks. I'll try anything at this point. "

Nick knew this was the entomologist's way of showing he cared. Grissom gave him what was the closest approximate of a smile.

The grave shift supervisor left as well, leaving Nick with two last houseguests. The criminalist went back to his sofa. He watched his two best friends. Greg was glued to the TV and actually seemed interested in the semi finals going on. On the other hand, Warrick looked dead on his feet. His partner was falling asleep in the chair.

Nick wandered over and peered down on the other man. "Why don't you go home bro? I don't have any sleeping bags that'll you can fit in." Nick chuckled.

Warrick rubbed his hands though his short cropped dreads. He gazed at his friend as if he was trying to determine if it was safe to let him out of his sight. Nick seemed more collected after four days of drug-induced rest. The CSI was hesitant, but Greg was going to stay tonight. Warrick had spent practically the last few days at Nick's bedside and he really needed real sleep.

Greg got out of his chair and started shooing the other man out. Warrick gathered his wits about him and headed home. He strode past Nick and tapped his shoulder. "Call me if ya need anything."

Nick smiled. "Sure thing. But I think Greggo and I will be fine."

Nick knew better then to argue about his over night guest. Warrick had told him in uncertain terms he would have people over for a while. Nick knew there was no way his partner would leave if the former lab tech weren't allowed to stay.

Greg walked the other CSI to the door. Catherine had gone home to be with her daughter. She still had lab duties to juggle after spending time at the hospital as well. Warrick dragged himself out the door. He headed home hoping he would not be plagued by horrific nightmares about his best friend suffocating.

Warrick looked over his shoulder at Greg Sanders. He didn't speak. No words were required. Warrick told the younger man with his eyes that he'd better take care of Nick. Greg stood up straighter. His expression was clear. He would make sure their friend was all right his first night home.

TBC...

* * *

Vonnie-

Gotcha on the pain meds, should have caught that. I was following some research and kind of forgot how it was given. Thanks. The ER scenes were an intense mixture of emotions to tackle. The Warrick, Nick interaction were the ones I was the happiest with.

Amy-

Thanks! I love the friendships, I really like sticking to canon..most of the time!

Shoebe-

Thanks again. We really planned a great deal out. Hope you like where it goes.

M2S-

Thank you. I felt like giving Conrad the benefit of the doubt, he might not be all that bad...maybe.

Kasey-

Thank you. Shacky and I can bring out different styles and input, I think it will continue to keep the story fresh. From watching the eppy more than I care to admit, and interviews, Nick was buried for 24 hours, what an amzingingly strong man. I just could never do it.

Kittyluv-

The updates should be about every two days, enough for people to catch up, but fast enough for everyone.

Groban-

And you're back as well! Thanks! Again the Warrick and Nick moments are my favorite and I really tried to tkae what I saw in the eppy and try to convey what I thought might have happened.

Jewelbaby-

There will be plenty of Greg and Nick interactions I promise. Thank you.

Sokerfreak-

This is a long story we really wanted to lay a foundation at fist, but yes, this will be all new ground. Thank you.

Designation-

I have this fetish for writing hospital scenes. LOL. Thank you, always look forward to hearing from you. Your pick of quotes that catch your eye always intrigues me.

Amarawind-

Thank you! Its very cool to see you again. I hope you enjoy the rest of the story as it goes on.

Higherbeingfriendsfan-

The emotions are going to go through the gauntlet in this story. Thank you so much. I love Warrick concern.

Genvessel-

Shacky handled most of the Greg parts in Chapter 1, I had him in sad muted silence. But we promise more in the upcoming ones. Thank you.

Poncholives-

The rescue scene I think is one of the most powerful sequences I've seen in TV. It really tugged on my heartstrings and I'm glad I was able to capture just some of it. Thank you.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4 by Shacky**

* * *

Greg turned to look at his charge for the night, who was presently sitting on the couch solemnly. He closed and locked the door after seeing Warrick take off. Greg walked back towards the living room. Something had grabbed Nick's attention again, and he was completely engrossed in it. Greg saw this time what it was, a small brown medication bottle. 

Nick realized he had been caught again for a second time in less than fifteen minutes. Feeling somewhat embarrassed, he decided that honestly this time, would be the best policy. He couldn't hide it anymore.

"I just don't think I can take these, man. I know what they can do to you, and I can't feel out of control of the situation. I just cannot do that to myself." Nick desperately hoped his friend would get it and not press the issue too much. He wasn't up for a fight already.

"It's OK, I can understand that Nick, they really can make you groggy. Let's just wait on these for now. They'll be there later if you think you need them to sleep or relax later. All right?"

Greg removed the bottle from Nick's hands, out of sight out of mind he was taught. The ex-tech placed the bottle along Nick's kitchen counter with the rest of the medications. Jesus, there were so many. Greg shook his head. There were pills for everything: anti-inflammatories, antibiotics, medications to help him sleep, antidepressants just in case just in case all the other pills weren't doing the job, and now anti-anxiety pills completed the set. No wonder Nick didn't want to take anything else and feel more drugged up and out of control.

"Hey, can I get you anything while I'm out here?" Greg yelled from the kitchen.

"Yeah, I could use some tea."

"Do you want the hot stuff or the cold stuff?" Greg wasn't sure which he preferred right now.

"Iced please boss, although it was a nice thought. I'm not a hot tea kind of guy, ya know? Despite what Sara tried to hand off to me."

"Hey, no need to explain yourself to me," Greg said as he sat down a glass of iced tea for each of them. "Some things about me have changed, but I still drink enough coffee for the entire department." Greg always restocked the coffee stash, since he was responsible for consuming the most.

Nick laughed at that thought, how could he forget about Greg's coffee fixes? He hadn't seen much of the newest CSI since that damn shift split.

"Speaking of things changing. What in the world did you do with all of your old crazy shirts, man? Don't tell me they are ALL gone."

He looked over at Greg still milling around in the kitchen. Even though was off for the next couple of days still had on a plain old button down blue shirt, which covered up a plain old T-shirt, blue jeans and his black dress shoes.

"What is this man, a conspiracy? First Hodges, now you. What is this world coming to?" He waved his hand dismissvely at the perplexed look Nick gave him.

"Forget it, don't ask. Hodges tried to talk to me about fashion sense and style. Don't worry; I still have every one of those loud obnoxious shirts, thank you very much. I do still get to go out on rare occasions and need something fashionable to dress in. I'm just going for the more professional look now." Greg said, smugly.

"Well, it's just you know, it takes some time getting used to the new you. The old Greg was so, so not like this." Nick hoped his point came across without making his friend feel bad.

"Hey, the old me is still under here so you and Hodges can stop your worrying about it. The other Greg, well let's just say he's keeping a lower profile now." He turned his head to look back at Nick, who actually grinned at him, which was a great sight to see, even if it was at his fashion expense.

"Anyway, it's about time I think you got something to eat. What sounds good to you? Probably anything after hospital food for four days." Greg understood he had to get his friend to eat something with that medication, and he wanted to make it was as tempting as possible.

"Yeah, I could go for a little something." But the thought behind the words didn't even sound believable to him.

"Well, OK, let's try this again, but with a little more enthusiasm. Hey Nick, are you hungry for anything bud, come on, my treat. Even on my meager CSI salary now."

"Yeah, yeah, we all know, pay cut. I probably don't want to know what you made before your 'promotion' do I?" Nick asked jokingly.

Greg just looked at him and shook his head. "No, you don't, and you're stalling. Food, now." He pressed the subject one more time.

"Ok, Ok, let's see here, I think I could go for some Chinese. I think. Something simple though, just some fried rice or something." He figured the compromise was good since he wasn't too hungry, but knew there wasn't any getting out of it completely.

"See, now that wasn't too hard, now was it? Be right back after I make that phone call." Greg called in their dinner.

An hour later, after several empty cartons of chicken fried rice and sweet and sour pork boxes, and the now finished basketball game. Nick was lay there half asleep on the couch. The sight made Greg feel at ease, on the inside, for the time being.

"Not bad for breakfast." Greg deadpanned. "This is usually my waking hour, but my body has no internal clock anymore. How's swing going? I don't get to talk to you too much anymore."

"Yeah I know man. It's still difficult getting used to. I mean after seven years of getting up when the sun's going down, it's damn hard to sleep when it's dark."

He wasn't being sarcastic. After he would get home, unless he pulled a double, Nick would usually sit up until at least 4 or 5 in the morning completely out of habit.

"Well, night shift sure isn't the same without you, Warrick, and Cath. It's kind of quiet. Sara and Sophia aren't ones for goofing around too much. No one to play video games with in the break room anymore." That was one thing Greg really missed about his friend not being there, just his companionship.

"Yeah, I miss those nights too, but have to go by Commander Ecklie's rules now unfortunately."

Nick stifled a yawn, as he realized he couldn't keep his need for sleep at bay any longer. "Hey man, I'm gonna head on to bed."

"Okay man, get some rest. I know where everything I need is already, so don't worry about me. If you need anything, I'm right here." Greg said gently, as he gave Nick a soft pat on the shoulder.

"Sure thing boss, I'll be fine, and... uh, thanks for staying with me... I really didn't want to be alone." Nick was afraid to admit it, but he was thankful his friend was here.

"No problem. Oh, and one more thing, are you sure you don't want that bubble bath Nicky?" Greg shouted over his shoulder at the retreating man.

"Ha Ha Ha, real funny lab boy!" Nick went down the hall towards his linen closet.

"Just trying to help."

"Ugh! Hey!" Greg felt the dull thud of something hit him in the back of the head. Ah, his blanket for the night, then another soft object hit his head, yep, his pillow.

"Kidding man, just kidding," Greg couldn't help but laugh at the expression on Nick's face.

"Yeah remember that, next time it will be that spare bowling ball I keep under my bed." Nick played back.

* * *

Nick went into his bathroom. God it felt good to be home, his own stuff, his place, and his personal space back. There were so many moments he thought he would never be standing here brushing his own teeth. He finished getting washed up and went into his bedroom. 

The CSI took off his sweat pants and changed T-shirts. His neck and arms itched. Hell, every part of his flesh was so agitated, but he wasn't going to think about that. Nick turned off his light, closed the door and crawled into his own bed. It was a pure joy to have some privacy. It was his first time being alone. Nick shook his head. He was NOT going to think about the last time he was alone. He sighed, now was not the time to go down that road, he chastised himself.

* * *

Greg knew he wouldn't be able to sleep for several hours, and that was if he was lucky. It was only 10 o'clock. He was usually just getting ready for work at this hour. Everything had been so screwed up since that damn package come in. Twenty-four straight hours they spent searching for Nick. Then four more days back and forth from the hospital and Lab. He should be dead tired. But in reality, he was so wound up he could barely sit still, the adrenaline was still pumping through his veins. They found Nick alive. Greg wouldn't allow himself to think about what almost happened. 

It didn't matter. All the what ifs and perhaps... were irrelevant now. Here he was sitting on Nick's couch about to settle in for the night while he took care of his friend. Yeah, life was pretty good at the moment as he sat there channel surfing.

* * *

Dark. 

His room was so dark.

Nick never realized it before.

Quiet, it was really, really quiet.

Wasn't there usually more noise then this?

After sleeping during the day and working nights for so many years, he still hadn't gotten used to the stillness of the evening. Where was Greg and why was he making so little noise? He was sure the younger man was still out there. He wouldn't have left him alone, would he? Nick knew he had been in here close to an hour, but no matter how exhausted he felt, sleep did not come for him.

Relax he told himself, take deep breaths, in and out just like the doctor showed you when he explained how to release tension. Where was his gun? Maybe he would feel better if he had his gun. Nick took it out of the drawer where he kept it and set it where he could see it on his nightstand.

Yeah, that made him feel better now. He grabbed it and turned the safety off as he set it down within arms reach. Now if he could just stop this damn anxiety.

Why the hell was he shaking like this? What the hell was this coming from?

It started ever so slightly. His hands trembled, at first. Then he switched to lying on his side. Being flat on his back, had started it perhaps. But, then the slight movements started to affect his arms, and then his whole body shook.

His room was pitch black. No color, just darkness. It used to comfort him, lull him to sleep. Now it was eerie. He closed his eyes despite the increased beating of his heart. The slight constriction in his throat.

He squeezed his eyelids tight then covered them with his hand.

It didn't help, he felt the fear. The bed, the outlines of the mattress around his body. It was unnerving.

He raised his hands in the air to make sure there wasn't a lid above him. It should have dampened the paranoia, but instead it just increased it. Finally he couldn't take it anymore. Nick opened his eyelids into mere slits.

There it was...a bright white light. In his room...shining right in his eyes.

He shot it out, he knew he had. Nick remembered that well.

The sickly sweet gum. His ears still felt sticky on the inside. It took forever to get them clean again.

Maybe it was nerves. Maybe it was lack of sleep. Perhaps it was some odd side effects of his meds, but Nick would never know.

However, nothing changed the fact what that the light represented.

Pain and torture. He was under a microscope, and it was back in his underground hell. Nick grabbed his gun. He could do it again, shoot the damn thing out if he had to.

What the hell, OW!

Something was crawling up his legs, biting him. No! He wasn't sure if he actually screamed this time or if he was yelling inside his own head. There it was again, something was sneaking up his arms now and he kept brushing away phantom ants from his body. That light was still on. Damn it!

He shot it out...didn't he?

Who the hell kept turning the God forsaken light back on? He aimed his gun towards the light again, as the biting started once more.

"Turn off the damned light! Can't you see me?"

Nothing. No response.

" I'll blow it out again, I swear to God I'll do it. Don't think I won't !" Nick screamed at the phantom kidnapper who was peering at him through the bright light. He made his point by aiming unsteadily towards the window.

* * *

One hour had passed and Greg had found some classic movie slasher flick on Sci-Fi. He thought he would be sick of this stuff with his line of work, but movies where a different story. He got comfy in his T-shirt and boxers not too long after Nick went on to bed, and it was still only 11o'clock. His night was just beginning he thought to himself, as he took another drink from his coke. 

"Damn this is gonna be a long night if I don't catch some sleep." He said to the empty room.

Greg hadn't even finished the thought when he heard shouting coming from Nick's bedroom. It wasn't just the screaming that sent him running. It was the tone: the fear and utter desperation dripping form Nick voice.

Greg was in Nick's room in a flash. When he got there, the sight before him chilled him to his core. No training had prepared him for a situation like this, or could it have. Nick was laying there in the dark, his right arm pointing his gun out the window, while his left was busy brushing away phantom fire ants off of his body.

The last thing he wanted was to spook his friend, but he needed to bring him back form whatever horrible nightmare and flashback he was trapped in. The younger man stared at the shaking gun pointed in one direction. He knew full well that Nick wouldn't think twice about firing it at anything that frightened him, as his body thrashed about the bed.

'My God, what did you go through Nicky?' Greg thought to himself.

The younger man knew he needed to reach his friend somehow, and bring him out of the place he was ensnared in.

He slowly opened the door further as quietly as possible. The last thing he wanted was that gun pointed at him.

"Nick... Nicky?" he said very softly and as calm as he could in this type of situation.

"Nick, it's Greg, remember me? I'm here with you Nick, you aren't alone." He hoped the soothing tone would reach inside the CSI's nightmare.

"You're not there Nicky, you're home. I'm here with you this time, you are NOT alone Nick, I'm here."

"Greg, make it stop, make it stop, turn that damn light off please!" Nick half begged.

It made his heart break at the sound of his friends fear.

"Nick, you trust me right? You know I'm not gonna let anything happen to you while I'm here." Greg could see Nick shake his head slowly up and down in the darkness.

"Good Nick, then I need you to do something for me. I need you to trust me and close your eyes, can you do that for me?" Greg prayed he was getting through to his friend.

"I don't know.." Nick's voice wavered, still trapped by his fear.

"I know your scared Nick, but if you trust me, I can make it all go away. I promise, all right? Now just please close your eyes real tight for me." Greg pleaded to his frightened friend.

He could see him frantically nodding his head again though the dark.

"Good Nicky, Ok I'm gonna turn on your light on and it will all be gone, all right. Ready, one, two, three." With that Greg flipped the light.

The room filled back up with solid images of his bed, dresser, and closet. The nightstand came back into view, as well as his window.

"See Nicky, it's OK, you can open your eyes now. See, look, you're in your own room Nick, it's safe here." Greg tried to reason with him, hoping it would dawn on the other CSI where he was.

The grief stricken man slowly opened his eyes. He blinked several times as the safety of his bedroom slowly came into focus.

"Greg?" He looked at him panicked. "Oh Greg, God, I'm so, I'm so sorry, I didn't . . . . I mean... Oh God, did I? ...What did I . . ." he tried to continue, but couldn't find the words.

Greg stepped in and helped. "Hey man, it's all right. Flashback aren't uncommon, just do me a favor please and give me your gun."

The Texan almost seemed surprised to be holding his loaded weapon, ready to fire it.

"Oh Jesus Greg, what was I . . What am I doing?"

He turned the gun around butt end first and handed it to his friend. Greg snatched it quickly, snapping the safety switch back in the on position, and set it atop of Nick's dresser.

Well, Thank God that part was over Greg thought to himself.

"Hey dude, it's all right." He sat down next to Nick on his bed and gently put his arm around his back, trying to console him.

"These things are gonna happen. You went through hell, and you can't expect to come back unscathed from it all. I can't tell you how many nights I woke up swearing I was covered in glass and smelled my own burning skin." That wasn't a lie to make him feel better.

"Yeah, but I wasn't sleeping I couldn't get to sleep. Too dark, too quiet." He was tried to explain behind a shaky voice.

"Then I saw a light, or...uh..imagined one and, I was right back there. It was just like that damn bright light, and, and I . . I grabbed my gun, and then I was pointing it and. . . I don't remember Greg, I don't remember." Nick rubbed his face wearily with his hands, truly terrified at what he almost did.

Greg once again laid his hands on Nick's shoulder to let him know he was there. Then he had an idea.

"OK, that's it, you're coming with me." With that Greg grabbed Nick's pillows and blankets off of the bed.

"Dude, we're having a sleepover." Greg walked out leaving a very confused Nick Stokes in his wake.

The Texan followed Greg out into the living room, where he had carried armloads of blankets and pillows back towards his original location.

"Uh bossman, a sleepover?" Nick questioned him.

"Yeah, remember sleepovers? Staying up late, well scratch that since we do that every night now. You know, play games, eat too much junk food, play more video games. You do have junk food in this house don't you?" Greg asked as he stalked off towards the kitchen, he was a man on a mission.

"Tell girl stories, play some more until your eyes bug out, paint our toenails and do each other's hair."

At the perplexed look he got from Nick he laughed out loud. "Just wanted to make sure you were paying attention." Greg shouted back over his shoulder from the kitchen as he searched for something they could munch on.

"What, no chips, no dip, no cheetos, no chocolate. Oh salsa, that's original." For the second time that night he felt something smack the back of his head.

"Some of us just eat healthier than other." Nick teased back.

"There's healthy, then there's down right boring, and you my friend are no Mr. Excitement."

"Well, I think there' some ice cream in the freezer, if it meets your high standards." Nick could feel the glare Greg gave him across the room.

"I knew you'd have something, now go set up your PS2, cause I'm so going to kick your ass at Madden 2005. Please tell me you don't use Randy Moss anymore, he is such a loser."

Nick went back in his living room and hooked up the game. He felt much better already being back out here, with noise, the lights, and the company.

"Yeah, like Mr. Atlanta Falcons should talk. What did happen to them, oh that's right, nothing. No, I go with Peyton Manning now." Nick was loosening up by the minute, he could feel it is his muscles.

"Well, at least that's an improvement, and I'm so going to beat all over you if it follows reality at all, cause I have two, no make that three words for you.

"New England Patriots." Greg yelled back over his shoulder as he inspected Nick's freezer, once again disgusted with the contents.

"What, are you a communist or something? Vanilla and chocolate, you really now how to walk on the wild side there, Nicky."

"I think there's more back there if you just look, and what's wrong with vanilla and chocolate, there's classics and I like them." Nick defended his ice cream choices to the younger man.

"Nothing's wrong with it, it's just so you. ...Ah Ha! That's more like it, it's no Chunky Monkey, but it'll work, mint chocolate chip. Wow, really must have been a special night there huh?" Greg joked, as he grabbed the carton and two spoons.

The ex-tech sauntered back into the living room and plunked down by Nick who had the game ready to go. He held out his hand and gave Nick his spoon and two small pills.

"I know you don't want to take them, and I understand, but you need to relax and get some rest, some real rest. Nothing, and I repeat nothing will happen to you as long as I'm here, I promise you that my friend." Greg said this as seriously as if he were presenting evidence to Grissom.

"Thanks man," the CSI swallowed, "for everything." Nick knew he needed to give in and get some rest. With someone here, he truly felt safe, so he swallowed the sleeping pill and one of his anti-anxiety meds with a swig of coke. "You Uh, ...really helped me out back there, and um, ...I don't know what would have happened if,... if . . ."

"Hey don't. That's what friends are for. Not let's get at it."

Two hours later, and a half a gallon of mint chocolate chip ice cream, and getting his butt utterly whipped 45-21, Greg was beyond humiliated.

"Are you sure you don't want to do my hair, I mean it isn't too late to change your mind. See, it's longer now, come one, you know you want to." Greg tried his best to distract his friend, even resorting to batting his eyelashes.

"Take defeat like a man G, you got you ass handed to you by the Colts" Nick yawned. "Speaking of, what's with the flat look anyway man?"

"Oh, you know me, something different. Trying out a new style. What do you think?" Greg seriously wanted to older man's opinion.

"Honestly, man." Nick yawned again leaning back against his pillow which was spread out across the floor along with his blankets. "I kind of miss the spikes, you know, the finger in the socket style I liked to call it." Nick's eyes started to close involuntarily. "I liked that it was just so you, set you apart, like your personality. Don't let this CSI stuff change who you are too much man, the old Greg was fun."

That thought make the young CSI smile for some reason, he didn't really like it either, but thought it looked more professional, well as professional as he wanted to get.

"Thanks Nick, I'll keep that in mind."

Nick's eyes shot back open for a moment and he grabbed Greg's shoulder.

"Thanks again, G. I...I mean...I don't know what would have happened." Nick stopped mid thought. He wasn't the type of guy to talk about his problems, this was very hard. "I'm glad you're here."

With those final words Nick's eyes drifted shut one last time. "And I so kicked your ass lab boy." Nick grinned as he drifted off.

Nick's breathing evened out and he actually looked peaceful this time. Greg knew the combination of the medications would help him get a good nights sleep and hopefully keep the dreams at away for the night.

Greg went over and covered up his friend, but kept his arms out because he knew if they got to hot, they might start to itch.

"Sleep well my friend, you're safe now, I won't let anything happen to you tonight, I promise. Good night Nicky."

Greg quietly picked up their mess, and shut off the TV. He went over and grabbed his pillow and blanket to settle himself onto the couch where he could still keep a watchful eye on his charge just in case he was plagued by dreams. He wanted to remain close by. He reached up to turn off the lamp by the couch, and just as his fingers touched the switch, he thought better of it. They would both probably sleep better with the light on tonight. Greg laid his head on his pillow, and quickly followed his friend to sleep.

tbc...

* * *

Kristen999 A/N. I want to thank everyone for such lovely comments. I'm glad that each character rang true as that is always my aim to be emotional, but realistic. I love friendship stories, and interaction between characters. There will be tons of development throughout the story, so I hope everyone enjoys. Shacky has the next two wonderful chapters, and you really make me blush with yourkind words.Talk to everyone soon. 

Shacky20 A/N: Thank you all for reading this. I really feel like this is my first chapter of the story since my first chapter basically constisted of recapping the show itself, just through Warrck and Greg's eyes. I really tried to capture the Nick and Greg banter that I have missed so much this season. I believe they still remain good friends even thought the team split has left them with extremely liittle on air time together this season. I really miss there fun and quirky scenes together, and I hopefully captured the essesence of their characters and friendship. I hope you like it and thanks for giving me a chance. I appreciate your time and feedback.

Jewelbaby- I must say this is ironic because I remembered your review while reading all of Kristen's other stories. I know You were looking forward to some Nick/Greg interaction, I hope you enjoyed this one then, I hope it lived up to your expectations, and they will be plenty more next chapter.

Shoebe- Wow, I hope we can live up to our expectactions, we have a lot planned at for our boys, al of them, and they go through a lot, hope you like where we take it.

Amy- I hope you enjoy my intrepretations of the friendships as much as Kristen's, she's a tough person to follow, I hope I can do an adaquete job

Karen- Thank you for your wonderful review. This will be a highly emotional story, and I hope we can keep the emtions high and true to character.

Brandy-Layne- I know so many people are reading this because it is a Kristen story, heck, I'm on here email alert list, I love her stories, I really hope you liked this chapter and the portrayel of Nick and Greg's friendship, and the rest of my chapters, I really want to live up to everyoe's expectations because I know how many people love Kristen's work, me included.

Groban- I hope all parts of this story keep you just as interterested and enthralled, it was a thrilling piece to write, and we tried to keep it as true to character as we thought was true, I hope this chapter was the same for you.

Chap 1 Anon- Well i hope you don't stay anon too long, I really hope you enjoy what Kristen and I have written for you all.

Tvspaz626- Well, I'm honored that you consider this one of the better "GD" stories you have read, but we have a long way to go, hope you hang on for the ride.

Miss Anonymour hp- I really hope you are enjoying this Nick/Greg/Warrick Friendship piece, it was a pleasure to write, and we believe we put a realistic take on how Nick will react, and how Warrick and Greg not only react, but help their friend get through it.

Katknits00- Yes, my main focus of the first chapter was basically to give a more indepth view of how Greg and Warrick were dealing with Nick kidnapping and how they were going out of their minds with worry and trying to help. Now they are going to do their best to help Nick deal with what he's been through, while dealing with their own feeling of helplessness.

Sokerfreek922- I hope you like the emotional stuff we are going to tackle now with Nick's recovery, and that you liked this chapter as well.

Designation- Well, I hope I lived up to the wonderful set up Kristen left me with at Nick's first night home with Greg. Kristen has an incredible talent for writing such great medical scenes, I hope you liked the emotional connection and banter I tried to keep between Nick and Greg which I have sorely missed.

Bolero- Worse than crack huh? I hope ours falls into that category, and we well be feeding this addiction reguarly.

Amarrawind- I hope my parts are just as amazing and gripping as Kristen's, I tried to lean on my strength, more emotional and angst, and I am such a big Nick and Greg fan and have missed their banter so much this season. Updates will be quick, don't worry.

Highbeingfriendsfan- I really hoped you liked this chapter as well, I too loved how Kristen wrote Sara and Grissom in Chap 3, so true to character.

Genvissel- I really hope you like the Greg I wrote in this Chapter, trying to take charge yet still be his friend and understanding and the 'old Greg' first

Phoncolives- I hope this GD stories lived up to all to all of your expectations and you enjoyed this chapter as well


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 by Shacky**

* * *

Greg woke up promptly at 8AM the next morning. He grinned when he heard Nick was still snoring away on the floor. At least he was getting some good rest Greg thought and felt relieved. He quickly got up and put his plan into motion calling Catherine. When the supervisor heard his idea, she was more than willing to do her small part to help put it in action. 

After a quick shower, he didn't want Nick to wake up alone, he hopped back into the kitchen. He tried to scrounge something up for a quick breakfast before their little adventure, when he heard the soft knock on the door.

Greg walked over and opened the door quietly, not wanting to disturb his sleeping man, who was sprawled out on the floor.

"Hey Catherine, thanks for pulling this together on such short notice."

"No problem Greg, anything I can do to help, ...uh... why is Nick sleeping on the floor out there?" Catherine gave Greg a questioning look, but Greg thought he would keep their late night incident to themselves.

"Oh Nick, was having a hard time relaxing in his bed so we had a sleepover and played games until he finally just conked out. He looks so relaxed out here I dared not try to wake him or move him."

"He does look a little better, how was the first night home?" She asked, genuinely concerned.

"Um, it went good. I got him to eat some dinner, then we played some PS2 until he finally fell asleep. I felt better where I could see him." Greg was being half truthful, because he could rest better when he could see Nick, but Catherine didn't need to know Nick was afraid to be alone in his room. That would stay between the two friends.

"So, what are these big plans for the day with this?" Catherine asked, as she handed over the special order Greg put in an hour ago.

"I thought that it might do Nick some good to get out of here for a couple of hours today, if he feels up to it. I thought we'd drive up to Lake Mead, take in some fresh air, open space, have a picnic lunch. Thanks so much for bringing this stuff over. I really didn't want to leave him alone." Greg said, as he looked back over at his friend.

"That's understandable, and anything else I can do to help, you let me know. Oh, and I put in a bottle of bug spray since you guys will be outside. Nothing to spray directly on Nick, that could aggravate the skin, but something to put around the ground and the blanket. It supposedly blocks anything from getting in."

"Thanks Cath, I never even thought about that for some reason. Gosh, why didn't I?" He chastised himself.

"Hey Greg, don't worry about it, it's not something we usually think about, but I figured better safe than sorry now."

"Thanks again, and Warrick's coming over tonight to stay with him, he really needed to get some rest, he looked beat." Greg said, fishing for a little info on his other friend.

"Yeah, he was pretty tired after all those days at the hospital, thanks for staying with Nick last night. I don't think Warrick was up to it yet."

"Hey, I'm his friend too, and I want to help, so anything I can do, just let me know, okay?" Greg walked over and gave Catherine a quick hug.

"He's good, we're all good. Now we just need to get Nick all healed up and help him now."

"I know, doesn't make it any easier knowing when almost. . ." then Catherine stopped herself, knowing this was exactly the point Greg was getting across to her.

"I need to get home. You two have a good time today, but don't let him overdue it." Catherine still handed out the orders like the supervisor she was.

"Yes Mom, and I'll have him home before bedtime." Greg teased back and Catherine smiled that grin that Greg hadn't seen since before this whole nightmare started.

"Have a safe drive and I'll see you two soon. Bye." She gave Greg a quick kiss on the cheek and was gone just as quickly as she came.

Just as the door shut Greg heard grumbling coming from the floor where Nick was starting to wake up.

"Was that Catherine I just heard?" Nick asked through a sleep thick voice.

"Yeah, I asked her to drop something off for me. How did you sleep?"

"Well, I feel better. Like I actually got some rest if that's what you mean. I must admit those pills did help." Nick really hated giving into that fact, but it was true.

"Just remember they're only temporary, so what do you want for breakfast? How does some scrambled eggs and toast sound? Then I have a special surprise for you."

Greg was beaming, so Nick knew he had something planned. "Sounds pretty good. Are you gonna tell me the second half of the or do I have to guess?"

"Oh I'll tell you after you shower, go on, I'll make breakfast, and not one joke about my cooking abilities mister or no butter on your toast. So go clean up, and it'll be ready when you get back." Greg quickly put the basket full of sandwiches and pop in the refrigerator to keep them chilled until they left.

"Ok, give me ten and I'll be back." Nick got up a bit unsteady at first and shuffled his way towards the bathroom and his shower.

When Nick came back to the kitchen he could smell his breakfast cooking.

"Do I still need to guess or are you going to tell me what Catherine was doing here?" Nick questioned.

Greg looked up at Nick, and handed him his medication for the morning to take with his breakfast.

"No back talk about the medicine, just the essentials this morning." Nick looked at he pills with only mild distain but picked them up and took them anyway.

"I just thought you might like to get out of the house for awhile today. Nothing too stressful, just a little drive, a little water, a picnic lunch, how does that sound?" Greg asked, hoping his gesture wouldn't be for not.

"Really? Where to man?" Nick's curiosity was definitely piqued now.

Greg braced himself against the kitchen counter and looked up with a serious expression.

"There's this little spot up at Lake Mead I used go to and sometimes still do when I want to get outta my head. Remember what's good with the world, or just kind of think, you know? I uh ...I used to go there quite a bit after the, you know, after the explosion. I uh ...didn't know if I would ever be able to come back. I used to drive up there and just think and sit. I'd stare at the water, and sometimes it really helped. I though maybe I could take you up there today and just kind of relax. We could get some fresh air."

Nick just looked up at him, a little stunned for a moment. Greg never ever talked about the time after the explosion and he had no idea Greg thought about never coming back. The place where Greg Sanders went to clear his head must be a special place.

"That sounds like a great idea G, I think I could use a little fresh air."

"Great." Greg looked up genuinely surprised and happy at Nick's agreement to go. "Great man, I had Catherine drop by some sandwiches and soda and stuff in case you said yes. So whenever we get done hear with breakfast and cleaned up, we can head on out of here." Greg seemed enthused about their adventure.

* * *

An hour later after the dishes were picked up and put away, the SUV was packed up with a few things they might need. The two were on there way for a day of sun and relaxation. 

Greg drove and headed South on Highway 582 towards Henderson, and then turned East onto Highway 564. Within an hour, they were pulling into Greg's spot, right around the Las Vegas Bay Area of the Lake. It was on the Western

Side of the Lake, not too far from Vegas itself. Nick had to admit that Greg had found quite a beautiful peaceful spot. Away from most of the tourists and boats, and people in general. Plus it had a spectacular view of the Lake, as far as the eye could see was blue water, and Nick breathed in the fresh air like his life depended on it.

"Go ahead and find a spot to sit," Greg yelled over to Nick. "Just let me grab these couple things, and I'll be right over."

The young CSI grabbed a blanket for them to sit on, the picnic basket that Cath had packed and the cooler for their drinks. Then he went to join his friend under a nice shade tree he had picked out that stared out right over the water.He brought over the bottle of bug spray and held it up and started spraying around the blanket. At the strange look from Nick, Greg tried to explain.

"Hey, better safe than sorry, man. I don't even want a knat coming within 25 feet of you. Speaking of, did you grab that epi-pen the doctor gave you just in case?" Greg forgot to check before they left the house to see if Nick had grabbed it. Like he said, he didn't want to take any chances at all with being outside.

"Yes Dad, it's right here." Nick grabbed it out of his pants pocket and showed Greg, who was giving him his best insulted look.

"Just trying to look out for you man, can't be too careful right now." He was serious though, he didn't want to think what another bug bite of any kind could do to Nick right now.

Greg grabbed a bottle of iced tea and handed one to Nick and then grabbed one for himself.

"I thought it might be a good idea to get out in the open for awhile. I used to come out here quite a bit, after, uh, you know, "BANG'!" Greg made a wild gesture with his hands, even to this day he didn't like to use the word explosion.

"You know I almost didn't come back to the lab." Greg said quietly, admitting a secret he hadn't shared with anyone before.

"No, G, I didn't know that. Did you tell anyone else?"

"No, I had to think it out for myself I decided. I was so scared, I mean literally scared to be in the lab for a while. I always doubled checked everything for the longest time. I began to second-guess everything I was doing in the lab, my ability to do my job, my ability to be part of the team. " Greg was speaking from the heart, and Nick understood that he was trying to get something across to him.

"But then I would come out here, and if I got off work at just the right time. I could get here just right when the sun would come up over the water. I loved my job, I loved what I did, and I loved working with you all. I realized that there was no way I couldn't come back, because that wasn't me. I wasn't going to be scared off by an accident." The memories took him back to a place that Greg didn't like being, but he thought it would help Nick understand he wasn't alone.

"You know Greg, I never knew you didn't consider coming back. I'm glad you decided to stay, it wouldn't have been the same without you." Nick was sincere, it was like watching his little brother graduate from college.

"Well of course it wouldn't have, I'm the life of every party." Greg laughed.

"Of course, how could I ever forget that." The smile on Nick's face felt good.

"Then sometimes when it got hard, when I thought maybe I made the wrong decision. I would come back out here. The time I failed my first proficiency I came out here and spent hours just thinking "What the hell have I done? Why did I think I could ever leave my 'Lab'?"

"You should be proud Greggo, you made it happen, all by yourself. You're a real CSI now, and still a hell of a Lab Tech. That's a lethal combination in a courtroom."

Greg chuckled at that comment, he had been told that several times. "I just hope that you don't let what happened to you destroy you like it almost did me. We were so scared Nick, I don't think you understand that part, you couldn't. I cannot imagine what it must have been like for you, and if you need to talk." He grinned and handed his friend a sandwich.

Nick grabbed the sandwich, although he wasn't real hungry. He looked over at his friend and thought maybe he was right.

"Greg, I can't tell you how many times I thought ..."

Nick visibility shuddered at the memories and couldn't bring himself to contiune. Not yet.

Greg thought that maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all."Hey, we don't have to talk about it. Just know if you need to, or when you are ready, you have lots of people ready and willing to listen. You will probably be sick of us all by within the next couple of weeks."

"I really don't think so," Nick grudgingly admitted. " I don't want to be alone... doesn't that sounds crazy?" Nick looked away for a second, but forced himself to continue. "I need to be reminded I'm not alone, and I like hearing the noise, voices..."

Nick's voice grew quieter. This was difficult and his old habits of bottling everything up kicked back in.

"You won't have to worry about that." Greg knew everyone had their shift with Nick until he kicked them out. They figured he would know when he was ready for his privacy back.

Nick sat on the ground, and allowed his lungs to fill with fresh, crisp air. He never knew if he'd feel this alive again after his whole ordeal and even though he sensed that Greg needed to talk about things, he just wasn't up for it. Everything was too ...fresh and raw.

Talking, people always thought discussing things were a way to heal wounds...it just was never his way. Move on. He wanted to forget, and re-hashing his experiences inside the box wasn't going to help him now. If he just concentrated hard enough, then he would start to salvage parts of his personality back. He looked over at Greg and knew the kid needed this as much as he did. He smiled slightly, the younger man was really trying.

"I made it out Greg. Everything's going to be fine. I mean, look? I'm out at the Lake sharing a sandwich with you and I'm going to heal, it will just take a while." Nick knew he wouldn't heal overnight, but he was feeling a better that he was out of the hospital and with his friends again.

The Texan swallowed, it still seemed like his friend had some reservations. Of course freaking out last night was bound to give the kid doubts. "I'm sorry about last night. It's...well, I just kept seeing that damn light in the darkness. It was so freakin' bright, and it was so stifling in there...I...just... ..couldn't stand it being on all the time."

Nick took a shaky breath. He wouldn't share any more. All it did was rattle him. He just hoped that little bit of information would let Greg feel a bit better about things.

"I'm so sorry we kept that light on so long, if we had any idea what it was doing to you, we wouldn't have, but we just had to ..."

"Wait, what are you talking about? How did you know about that light?"

Nick's tone was troubled and his body had visibility tightened up, and up that point Greg realized he had opened his mouth once again without thinking.

"I, I'm sorry Nick, I thought you knew. I was sure someone had told you by now." Greg resigned to the fact that he would have to tell Nick the whole story now by the scrutiny of the Texan's glare.

"Shit man, I just assumed." The nervousness is Greg's voice was coming through.

"Well, I didn't and I would like someone to explain it to me. How did you know about the light Greg?" Nick knew his words were coming out harsher then he meant too, if wasn't his friends fault, but only Greg could give him the answers he wanted know.

"Not long after we knew you were missing we got a small packaged delivered to the Lab. It was a web feed and we popped it into the computer. On the screen, it said 'you can only watch'. When he clicked, there you were. Greg felt defeated having being the one to tell this to Nick, but he deserved to know.

At Greg's words, Nick visibly paled. He felt so violated. It wasn't like he hadn't been through hell, but knowing that they had all seen him. He felt humiliated, like an insect under Grissom's microscope. He wanted to look at Greg and tell him it was all right, it wasn't his fault he didn't know, but he couldn't. He was too ashamed and deep down angry at the moment. He waited for the lab tech to continue. He knew there was more, and he knew he didn't want to hear it, but he wanted to know what everyone else did.

"If we had any idea that it was doing that to you, or taking up so much battery, we wouldn't have. But, it was the only way we could see you. We had to know you where all right. See you were still alive." Greg said the last words so softly Nick had a hard time hearing them.

"Someone was always in there keeping their eye on you, making sure you were all right." Greg had a hard time hiding his own trauma of witnessing Nick's plight in the box. The memories still haunted him to no end.

"Hey man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come down on you." He put his arm around Greg's shoulder and gave it a squeeze to make the younger man look at him.

"I just didn't know. Needless to say this comes as a shock. And you're right, I can't imagine how helpless you all must have felt." He was trying to reassure Greg he wasn't upset at him, but deep down he felt somewhat angered that no one had bothered to tell him in the past four days they all watched him suffer, cry, scream in panic, and didn't tell him. He hadn't felt that violated since he knew Nigel Crane had been watching his every move in his own home. He felt himself pull back from Greg a little. He just wanted a few moments to think about the information just given to him, and how to handle it with Warrick and the rest of the team.

"In a way, it saved your life, because that was the only way we knew how to find you. Grissom had been uh... watching the screen, when your face started to change. He could see you look down and squirm. Grissom panned in towards the cracks in the glass and could see them moving and realized they were ants. He waited until one of them crawled in front of the camera and took it's picture."

Somehow that though made Nick chuckle. Grissom taking pictures of ants as he was being eating alive by those things. He listened as Greg continue his story of that night.

"He found his book and identified it as a certain fire ant, which are very rare apparently in Nevada and only keep to tree and plant nurseries. We found every tree and plant nursery in the Las Vegas area. Archie and I compared the web cam transmission radius with the black box mileage we got from the kidnappers SUV and only two were within the overlapping land. Then it all happened so fast. Sara remembered that the kidnapper's daughter, Kelly, worked with plants and ran and grabbed her file, and found the nursery she worked in. She came running back into the room and pointed to exactly where you were." Greg told his story as detached as possible, but it was hard not getting caught up in the stressful moments again.

We went there with every available cop car, fire truck, responder unit we could, which was the entire department I think. Hell even Ecklie was there."

At that Nick looked up at Greg.

"You're kidding?" He was surprised to here he even helped out.

"I told you Nick, everyone was looking for you, we weren't gonna lose you when we were that close to finding you. And as bad as it may seem, if it wasn't for that camera and those fire ants, we may never have known where you were." Greg was trying not to make Nick feel any worse or embarrassed than he probably already did.

"Thanks for telling me Greg, I'm not mad at you." He wasn't upset at Greg, at least he had been truthful and let him know what had happened.

"I just feel bad Nick." Greg confessed, as he wiped away a couple of tears.

"I bring you out here to get your mind off of all of this, relax and enjoy some fresh air. Then all I did was add to your troubles."

"G, you didn't add anything, only one person is responsible for this and he's dead. I'll recover man, I always do." Nick smiled one of his 100 watt grins, and Greg instantly felt better.

What he said was true, but he would get his answers from someone. Warrick, Grissom, and Catherine. He wanted to know why no one told him this.

"I am glad you brought me here, I needed to get out for a while. I must admit the sunlight feels good, now how about we finish those sandwiches."

The two ate in companionable silence for the next hour. Enjoying the breeze off the lake, the fresh air, talking about Nick's fishing trips when he you growing up back in Texas. Reliving the case about the Scuba Diver up in the tree not too far from where they were. Nick was growing tired quickly and his caretaker could see his eyes growing weary.

"Hey, you ready to head back man? Warrick should be at your place soon, plus you look a little sleepy." Greg was trying not to sound overbearing, but he didn't want to wear his friend out.

"Yeah I am a little tired, let me help you here." Nick stood up but wavered somewhat.

"You're kidding right? Get in the truck and sit down, I'll get this. I'm here to help you, so let me do my job."

"Ok ok, I'll be in the truck waiting for you bossman." Nick was worn out, but he was trying hard not too show it too much.

Greg threw the stuff in the back of the SUV and hopped into the driver's seat. "I guess I'll let you pick the music for the drive home, and yes, that is quite an offer from me so don't mock me."

Nick smiled a little and put in an old country CD he hadn't listened to in quiet awhile. However, he could barely keep his eyes open. They pulled out onto the main road and when Greg looked over to ask Nick if he needed to stop and get anything, he was fast asleep.

* * *

"Hey man, wake up." Nick slowly opened his eyes, not knowing he had even drifted off. 

"What, are we home already?" Nick asked through a fog of sleep.

"Yeah, that's what happens when you doze the whole way home. Come on, let's get you inside. Looks like Warrick is already waiting for us. I hope I don't get in trouble for keeping you out too late."

"Don't worry, I'll tell him I make you take out, he won't yell at me."

"It's not you I'm worried about right now." Greg looked a little concerned that he would scolded by the older CSI when they got inside."Come on, let's head on in before you fall down man."

tbc...

* * *

Author's notes: 

Thanks for the continued support of this story. We really tried to keep it as real as possible with character interactions as well as what we wanted to see evolve. As far as the medications that Nick is on, he takes all his pills for the ant bites, but has not touched the ant-depressants. We viewed it would be his style to shy away from those, however, he does take the anti-anxiety ones when pressed to. Hope every still enjoys this, as it will continue to progress, and Nick will have his ups and downs as he tries to get on with his life. It just might be tougher than he realized.

This was the easiest place to break up the chapters. Calm before the storm and all.

Thank you: Kristen and Shacky

Two more chapters by Kristen up next.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 by Kristen**

This chapter is rated M for a few curse words towards the end.

* * *

Warrick Brown had been arguing on his cell phone for the past few minutes. He had been hanging out with Nick the last few hours when he received the dreaded call. He paced outside on the sidewalk where he could get some privacy. He had been dating Tina for almost a month now. It was the most time he had invested with a woman in almost a year, but not nearly enough to say it was a totally dedicated and serious relationship. It still had this kinetic spark, a deep burning fire, but it lacked depth and a full fledged commitment.

"I said we'll talk about this later," he growled into the speaker before his ears were greeted with a click that signaled the end of the call.

He stared at his cell and shook his head as he stuffed it back into his jeans. He rubbed at his chin wearily. Tina just didn't understand. If she couldn't take the time to realize what he was going through and support him, then maybe she wasn't the right woman for him. Warrick worked his jaw back and forth and stomped back over to the townhouse. He would deal with this later.

He opened the door and walked back inside casually as if he just hadn't had a blow out with his girl. His partner lounged on his sofa and glanced up at him as he sulked into a love seat. Nick looked at him thoughtfully and gave him a head nod to ask what was going on.

Warrick grunted. "Nothin' man. Just my woman being a bit disagreeable."

Nick chuckled. "Not planning on going to any more fighting events?"

Warrick rolled his eyes. "Nah. You know how women are."

Now Nick really laughed. "Yeah, I do. But not too much lately."

Warrick cocked his head. "You kiddin me, man. I think you could have your choice of women back at the lab. Being famous and all."

It was meant to lighten up the mood, but Nick quickly looked away. It wasn't until he was out of the hospital and had his in depth conversation with Greg, before he realized how the entire lab had been so dedicated to finding him. When he was trapped in his little hell, it never occurred to him that everyone else had been tortured to every second of his struggles. Every painful moment that he experienced had been transmitted in loving detail to his coworkers. Nick had been made into a freak show spectacle at some mad carnival. The bastard had made sure that even with facing the prospect of death, that everyone in his world would be made to share with it. What kind of dignity would have back at his place of work?

The mastermind behind his ordeal had undoubtedly relished in his suffering. The kidnapper had made sure that every one of his friends had been traumatized by his plight. In the end, they had all been victims. Nick vowed that he wouldn't let that man have the last laugh.

"Whatcha thinkin?" Warrick asked, after it was obvious that his partner had drifted off into his own little world.

Nick shook his head. "I'm not. I won't waste my time dwelling on it, bro."

The criminalist fixed his eyes on the other man. His posture stiffened, as he gathered his resolve. "I'm not going to let it run my life."

Warrick didn't really think that his partner had come to terms with what he went though quite yet. But he wasn't going to push him to talk about it...not right now. The CSI studied his partner. Nick seemed relaxed enough sitting there in a dark blue pair of sweat pants and an old A&M T-shirt. The only physical reminders of his trauma were the bite marks along his face and neck. The rest of his devoured skin was concealed by clothing and the carefully taped gauze that adorned his arms.

The partners had done very little since Nick's visit to the lake. The two criminalists watched the world championship of poker on ESPN for several hours in between repeats of Pardon the Interruption. Nick wanted to lose himself in sports for a while. He squirmed in his seat constantly. His chest started to prickle and his lower legs were a mass of irritation. Every patch of skin itched like crazy and his forearms actually burned. Nick was starting to get anxious as his temperature rose and he started to break out into a sweat.

Warrick noticed how much Nick fidgeted around. "Why don't you try to relax?"

Nick just glared at him, and the other CSI grimaced at his poor sense of advice. "Have you taken you medication for the bites?"

"Yeah, man, its not helping." Nick hated the whine in his tone, but the itch was becoming quite bothersome.

He got up and stalked over to his kitchen counter. Nick took some Advil to try to reduce his slight fever and combat the swelling. After swallowing the pills, he started to walk back and fourth in the small area.

"You think pacing is going to help?"

Nick let out a long sigh. "Damn it."

He didn't know where to put his hands as his flesh seemed to crawl with agitation. The Texan let out a groan and rested his forehead against the wall. He tried to calm down, but he was slightly worn out from his trip to the lake. It was harder for him to relax in his annoyed state. His mind was overly stressed out from his emotional talk with Greg from earlier and his body was physically exhausted.

Warrick strolled over to him. "Nick."

His partner looked up.

Warrick inhaled a long breath. "Why don't you try out those herbs Gris gave you. They couldn't hurt."

Nick growled. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

"When am I wrong?" Warrick asked, his voice mocking a slightly annoyed tone.

Nick rolled his eyes as he snatched the container and strode into his bathroom.

* * *

The criminalist peeled away his T-shirt and threw it to the floor. He sat down on the seat of his toilet and systematically pulled away the tape, hissing when it pulled on the hair of his forearms. He unwrapped the cotton gauze reveling the swelled and irritated skin. Nick grumbled to himself, atleast the pain from some of the blisters had subsided.

Nick turned on the facet and started running the warm water. It took a few minutes for the tub to fill and Nick poured the herbs so they would have time to mix in. He pulled off his sweatpants and stripped off his boxers. Nick gingerly lowered his body in the soothing fluid as he pulled the shower curtain around.

The criminalist sighed deeply when the water hit his skin. His sore flesh was enveloped in a wave of moisture and easing liquid. Nick closed his eyes as he settled into the tub and rested his head against the tile behind him. After several minutes his tense muscles relaxed and his desire to scratch his skin raw was slowly erased.

Nick smiled as his flesh soaked in some of the healing properties of the water. He adjusted his position slightly, since his tub wasn't very big. His arm hit the wall when he tried to get comfortable and then his foot stubbed the facet.

He cursed, just as he banged his knee to one side.

The thing was too cramped. The CSI stared at the tiled walls surrounding him. Nick felt his heart start to pound in his chest. His breathing rapidly increased, as he gazed transfixed at the inner closure of the tub. His body barely fit inside and he started to feel closed in. Nick quickly swung open the shower curtain to reveal more of the room.

Air. He wanted more air.

He wasn't trapped by all sides. There was no Plexiglas above his head with dirt all around him. However, the steam that rose form the water suddenly made him feel intensely hot. It wasn't the dry heat from inside the box, but the combination of the tight space with the lack of cool air caused his throat to close up on him.

Nick sat straight up in the tub and placed his hand to his chest as his breath continued to get caught. He started to wheeze, as the panic engulfed the rest of him. Nick's blood pressure sky rocketed as he franticly crawled his way out of the enclosed area. He desperately clung to the grip on the wall above his soap dish. With his fight and flight response, he pulled himself up and nearly tumbled out of it. His foot slipped on the floor and he came crashing down. His knees shook so bad Nick had trouble getting to his feet.

He had to escape this room and now!

The frightened man grappled with the towel bar, his hand missing it several times. His fingers brushed lightly against it and hit the light switch on accident, plunging the bathroom into darkness. Nick found himself back on the floor as a strangled scream escaped his lips.

* * *

Warrick channeled surfed for quite a while, not really finding anything of interest to watch. He fiddled with the remote and found the settings used for all of Nick's favorites. Curious, Warrick starting rummaging through Nick's highlighted list, a small smile tugging around his features. Discovery Channel, A&E, Animal Planet, TLC, ESPN Alternative, ESPN, Speed Channel, Out Door Channel. Warrick shook his had good naturally.

"Only you, man." He muttered to himself.

Not being that bowled over by his partner's choice of entertainment, he put on of the music channels and settled on some lite jazz. The criminalist was tired. He did not get a lot of real sleep at his place. Warrick had bee too wired and mentally exhausted for any serious rest. He decided after tonight he would the gym and pound away at a punching bag. Maybe a lot of physical exercise would exert all his energy and let him fall asleep without any more dreaded nightmares.

He was about to get up to heat up one of the pizzas that Sara had purchased when he thought he heard a thud. Warrick turned his attention to the bathroom and concentrated on the noise. He wasn't about to go bounding in when his buddy taking a bath. He started walking closer when he his ears perked up at the sound of a muffled scream.

Warrick sprinted towards the closed door. "Nick?" He called out his name, uncertain what was transpiring behind the walls.

"Warrick!"

There was no mistaking that frightened voice.

Taking a deep breath, Warrick opened the door. The CSI squinted his eyes when he realized the bathroom was dark. He searched out a light switch and flicked it on.

Warrick's mind didn't quite register with the sight in front of him. His instincts kicked in before his ability to analyze, and he swiftly grabbed a towel and draped it around Nick's waist. The other man was shivering and was frozen still in fear. What alarmed Warrick the most besides the obvious breakdown was the fact that Nick was on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Come on, man let me help you up." He encouraged as he grabbed his partner's arm.

Nick could barely got his body to obey his commands. His partner had snagged his arm and was trying to help him stand. Despite feeling like some basket case, Nick was able to get his feet moving and had the presence of mind to clutch the towel around his waist, as he was lead shakily into the hallway.

Nick still felt like his heart had jumped into his throat and was beginning to feel slightly lightheaded. He couldn't catch his breath and his rubbery legs were about to collapse from his weight.

Warrick felt his friend slipping and slung his arm around his shoulders and literally slung Nick over to his sofa before he fell flat on his face.

"Put your head between your knees." Warrick commanded, as he wrestled with his own frantic breathing.

Nick took one rapid shuddering breath after another. He kept his head low and concentrated on trying to calm down.

Warrick stayed crouched in front of him going through all the steps in trying to help victims of a panic attacks.

"Its all right buddy. Everything's fine. " Warrick muttered.

Nick felt his pulse slow down, his chest felt like it was caught less in a vise grip. He wrapped one arm around his middle while the other one still kept himself covered up. After several minutes the rise and fall of his chest slowed a bit. Nick lifted his head slowly, testing to see if he still felt faint.

Nick leaned back against the soft plushness of his sofa and held his face in his left hand.

Warrick let out a slow exhale as he mind flooded with relief. He sat down hard on the floor and put his hand on Nick's knee.

"Um...do ya...I mean..do you have something you want to take?" Warrick looked into brown eyes, hoping that his best friend didn't take his statement the wrong way.

Nick occupied his mind by adjusting the towel around his waist. His cheeks burned slightly as the realization of what happened finally hit him.

"I--well. Yeah. I've got this script," he stuttered.

"Where is it?"

Nick swallowed. "I think somewhere on the counter," he said hoarsely.

Warrick busied himself with collecting the medication. His own hands shook slightly. He squeezed his eyes shut and grit his teeth hard. 'Goddamn that Gordon bastard for doing this.' He screamed in his mind. The CSI needed so badly to let go of his rage, but he would store it away for another time.

He looked at the bottle. Nick's physician explained to him the need for this prescription. Warrick tapped a single pill into his palm. He grabbed a glass of water and gave both items to his partner.

Nick took them quickly, before he allowed himself to think about what he was doing.

'No, he wasn't going to carry this with him all the time. He had to get past it...had to let it go.'

Nick sat numbly on his sofa as the adrenaline rush from his anxiety attack slowly faded. He didn't look up, couldn't face the stricken look of his best friend.

"Could you find my sweats." He asked, his voice cracking.

Warrick blinked several times. "Um, yeah...Sorry."

He entered the bathroom found the pants and grabbed his discarded T-shirt. He brought them back over. Warrick turned around as Nick slipped them back on and sunk back into the couch heavily.

Nick stared at his floor, his raw emotions bubbling to the surface. "First I can't sleep in my own bed last night...now..." Nick's voice trailed off.

Warrick looked down on him. He didn't have words to express how sick he felt inside. Helpless..he was so damn un-useful.

Nick ran his hand through his hair. He felt the volatile rage of his situation boil over. He bolted off the sofa with his hands holding each side of his face.

He breathed hard through his nostrils and let out a long and painful scream. Then he screamed some more.

Warrick flinched at the outburst. It was bound to happen. 'Let is all out, Nicky,' he thought to himself.

Nick pounded on his wall several times, but not hard enough to damage anything. It felt good to release his pent up rage. He placed each hand on the interior and turned his head towards his partner. "I was fine. Then the walls started closing in... then I couldn't breath." Nick bit his lip. "I held it together for 24 hours, Rick, and I can't even deal with being home."

Warrick stood next to him. "You had the guts and the will power and the determination to survive, Nick. However, all that's going to effect you later...you're human, man. I mean...Jesus, Nick...you went though Hell. You were fucking tortured, dude."

Nick shook his head. "What else am I going to freak out about, huh?" Nick stared at his partner willing him to give him some answers. "I mean am I going get the shakes from a stupid fan? Or I know...I'll freeze up whenever I enter the lab.. place's full of Plexiglas. Is there going to be a betting pool on that one?"

Warrick seemed frazzled. "One step at a time...that's what its going to take."

His partner looked up. "I found out about the feed..." Nick said in a low voice, his tone almost unidentifiable.

Warrick too a deep breath and let it out slowly. He walked past Nick as he reasoned out what he was going to say. His partner stood there lost in thought, it was obvious from his posture how mortified he was about the situation.

"Greg, told you?" He asked, his tone hostile towards the ex-lab tech.

Nick straightened to his full height and stalked over. "At least he didn't lie to me about it."

Warrick didn't flinch, but he was slightly hurt by the hidden accusation. "I was going to tell you when you ...when it seemed...

Ah Hell, Nick! I don't know when!"

Warrick brushed past him, with the CSI's eyes on his every movement ..."I mean what's the appropriate time to tell you partner, by the way, after you were abducted, we watched you fight for your life." Warrick turned around his face an angry sea of emotions. "It was so God damn awful..." he whispered.

Nick stared at his friend; all of his self doubt and maybe even a bit of self hatred, melted at the admittance. Nick had tried to forget about his moments in the box...it was easier if he just let it go. But every little thing he did, every freak out, every breakdown was shared with his closet friends.

He felt violently ill as he conjured up terrible fresh memories that he still battled to hide deep down. That damn light had haunted him last night. What Greg told him still played out in his head. He gulped at what all his friends had been put though.

He started pacing again, shaking his head. "He left my fucking gun in there with me, man."

"I know." Warrick said so quietly he wasn't even sure if it was really spoken out loud.

Nick turned slowly around, and faced a very haunted person. Warrick looked like a slight wind might knock him down, his partner had never seen him seem so...so fallible. The CSI started processing the last bits of conversation, then he paled slightly.

"You saw me take out the light."

His mouth was suddenly dry, his vocal cords didn't seem to work. "Yeah."

"I almost...I-I..." Nick felt his fingers treble with the imaginary weight of his Glock. Nick curled his hand into a fist, to keep it still. "The fan went out...I-I didn't want to die slowly.. we've all...seen... what..I mean... how horrible suffocation is."

"Eating my gun was one of the only options I had." Nick said his voice overly thick. His thoughts buzzed slightly by the anti anxiety medication.

Warrick swallowed. "You didn't man. You--you held on." Warrick shook his head. "Don't know if I'd lasted as long."

This was all wrong. Nick felt like he was going backwards. He was just supposed to stop thinking about it. Go on, push things forward. He looked at his partner. "I just want this all to go away."

Warrick put his hand on his shoulder. "Its going to take time." Warrick's face grew intense. "I'm here man. We're all going to be there for you. Nicky... you'll...we'll... get past this... I promise."

Nick felt the pounding of his heart slow steadily. His meds were relaxing him. Before he lost himself in an artificial comfort zone he gulped back another small breakdown. He had lost it too many times in front of Warrick. He wasn't going to do it anymore.

There was a slight twitch in his face and grabbed Warrick's shoulder. "Thanks, Warrick," he said, forcing the words out before they were cut off from his constricting throat.

Warrick kept himself together just a bit longer. He lifted his head, and stood up straight. "You're welcome dude. You're my brother, man."

Nick let out a long breath. He was feeling fatigued. He didn't say anything. Without another word he took a sleeping pill and headed for the couch. He wasn't even going to pretend that he was ready to lay in his bed again for a while. Nick sat down in silence, while Warrick got comfortable in the loveseat and clicked on the television again.

tbc...

* * *

Author's Notes: I was going to be away from the computer early Friday so midnight is still two days in my book!

Shacky and I want to thank everyone who has commented or given feedback on this story. When GD aired, we both felt like there was a lot left unsaid and needed to be explored. We both hope you enjoy this fanfic.

I personally felt that this episode needed and screamed for a more involved story. Here's to all the faithful and new readers. I hope you enjoy the ride. This chapter was one of my favorites to write. I have always loved the great bond between Warrick and Nick and could not have been more happy or moved by the events in "Grave Danger".--Kristen999


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7 by Kristen**

* * *

Nick stared at the door, imagining what the inside looked like, how it felt. It was a strange thing to be contemplating, but if he didn't make himself continue with this exercise, then he would be forced to deal with what he would deem a lack of progress. 

Two weeks. It had been fourteen days since...well...since the incident. Three hundred and thirty-six hours ago to this very day. His house was empty, void of the endless stream of house guests and visitors. After a week, he had refused to let anyone continue to spend the night. He had to learn to deal with the solitude of being a bachelor again.

To say it had been difficult was an understatement. Nick had walked the very fine line of wanting the comfort of his friends around him, to longing for the ability to be his old self again. The Nick who lived alone without problems, without the constant struggle of trying to find that elusive state of "normal."

So, instead of nightly houseguests, his friends just stopped by on a constant bases to see how he was doing, or to hang out. Between all the visits, Nick was very rarely ever alone. Nick felt like he was under scrutiny ... of course his coworkers were only concerned about him. However, all it did was put a spotlight on everything he tired so hard to forget.

For example his recent therapy sessions came to mind. Three times a week, he had to talk to his doctor, and most of the time it was just him fiddling around in his chair. His therapist tried to pry into every facet of his life that was effected by his ordeal. Nick didn't understand how all this digging into his psyche was going to help him get past things. Despite his objections, if he ever wanted to go back to work, Nick would do whatever his doc asked.

Which is what brought him to his current predicament. Nick was supposed to simply open the closet door, close it, and stand there.

"Enough of this." He said to no one in particular. Nick took a deep breath, counted to three, opened his hall closet, and stomped in.

Then he closed the door.

He waited for his eyes to adjust to the darkness, but after a few seconds, he realized that there was no light at all to focus on. It was pitch black, a tiny crack of light came through from the bottom of the door. It wasn't even enough to even allow him to make out any shapes. Of course this was a tiny amount of space. His back was against some of his coats, and he tried to keep from tripping over a few pairs shoes stashed away.

He was supposed to stay in here for five solid minutes, then exit and write down anything he felt while inside. Well, it had now been about a minute... it _seemed_ like a minute. Nick clicked on his cell phone to look at the time. The blue glow from the screen cast eerie shadows around.

His heart quickened at the sight of the light. For someone reason his entire body tensed up a bit, the hair along the back of his neck stood on end. Nick swallowed and tried a few of the calming techniques his doctor had taught him.

Two minutes, according to his clock. One hundred and twenty seconds and the nerves along his body were starting to fire off warning signals. This wasn't a very good sign. Nick began humming to himself, when he started to feel jittery. He had mastered the art of the quick shower, but this whole enclosed space thing was really starting to get to him.

His breathing was more rapid, and shallow, but he wasn't on the floor in a tiny little ball. That was progress right?

Four minutes had passed. He swallowed, as he tried not to think about how close the inside interior of the door was. It wasn't plastic, not like that damn box. He was safely behind his own closet...surrounded by the walls of his house. He felt a little trickle of sweat drip down his forehead. It was dry in here, stuffy.

Before his heart starting to increase he looked down. Five minutes, and his hands were all ready turning the doorknob.

He bolted back into his hallway, his heart pounded, his ears filled with the rapid intake of his harsh breathing.

Nick clapped his hands together and nodded to himself. "No problem, Stokes." He said to no one. He glanced at his pale white reflection in the mirror and ignored the shiver it sent down his body.

He did it. The task wasn't easy, but he'd write down how he felt.

Maybe not every detail.

Progress. He had made progress... yes, indeed.

He marched over to his counter and looked over the list of tasks written there.

Go out into busy public places. Check.

Stand alone inside closet for five minutes. Check

Sleep in own bed.

Nick stared at that next assignment. They were after all, just challenges. He could do them. The pen in his hand wavered only slightly. He looked around his living room, and let it slip out of his fingers.

Maybe he could try to overcome that task tomorrow.

* * *

One week after his attempt at being in a tight, enclosed space, Nick was getting closer to one issue had had yet been able to accomplish. Sara had driven him to his doctor's appointment. He was always with one of his coworkers, he was never alone. His therapist had felt that when Nick had finished each session that he was too anxious or on edge to drive himself home safely. Until it was deemed that the counseling was not effecting him to a point where he wasn't overly rattled, then he could drive himself. 

Soon, but not now. This was one of those obstacles that Nick had written down on his list of things to regain himself. His doc felt the list was a decent idea, of course his therapist wasn't quite sure how much the CSI had revolved his life around this piece of paper. It was viewed as symbol of what he called his old life.

Now he stood in his living room, around a myriad of shopping bags that littered his dining room table. Sara Sidle was unwrapping several large candles that they had purchased together after his last session. She would remove the tissue paper, stiff each candle, smile, then set it down next to all the others.

Nick wanted to get back on to his regular sleeping schedule. The biggest news that he had learned from work was the reformation of the old team. The graveyard shift had been expanded to include two new criminalists and Catherine and Grissom ran the team together. This meant when he went back to work, Nick would once again be on nights.

He would return to work with the people he enjoyed being around, and he wanted to get his body back to sleeping during the day. The Texan had forgone sleep yesterday so he would be tired when he got back from his excursion. It wasn't exactly a difficult thing to accomplish.

He was constantly plagued by nightmares and woke up in a cold sweat. It was one of the reasons he couldn't take haveing people spend the night anymore. He didn't want to subject them to his night terrors, and he really didn't want people to know how often they occured. When he did sleep, it was actually just a series of many short naps. Nick had yet to sleep an entire eight hours without the aid of medication, but if you added up all the little bits of shut eye, it had to count.

Just another level in his ten step program to becoming normal again.

Nick surpressed a yawn and Sara eyed him with a glint in her eye.

"Do you want help setting these up?"

Nick actually gave her a grin. "Do you think you could control yourself in my bedroom?"

Sara rewarded Nick was a quick jab to his shoulder. He mocked being hurt and smiled one of his million watt charmers.

"I can't believe I'm using scented candles," he complained as he took a huge stack of them to his bedroom.

"Aromatherapy Nick, it supposed to help." Sara tried to encourage as she followed him.

She placed several ones on his chest of drawers and his night stand.

Nick arranged them in some kind of pattern and sighed. "I guess."

The candles had served a dual purpose. His therapist had recommended them for their soothing properties as well as a source of light. Nick was still not comfortable in pitch blackness, which was needed to sleep during daylight hours. Any amount of lamps were other too bright, or just plain annoying.

Candles had been the supposed answer. Nick stepped back from the five he had arranged, and gave his friend an unconvinced expression.

"I'll try anything," he murmured softly.

Sara put her hand on his shoulder and Nick closed his eyes. Sara had lost count how many times she had reassured the man in front of her, that things would be all right. That he needn't set goals that were too high or push himself to hard. He always just brushed her concern away and she would always leave feeling worse about the situation.

Sara didn't go home and cry every night after spending time with Nick Stokes. No, she only allowed her feelings to get to her in her sleep, when even her mind wasn't aware the true nature of her own torment. She was as cheerful as she would ever be around the man. They shared breakfast, polite conversation, and dozens of movies together. She looked up at Nick who seemed too hesitant, too scared over the thought of sleeping in his own bed.

She pulled him closer and gave him a long hug. His chin rested on her shoulder, and she rubbed her hands up and down his back. This was the most progress Nick had made in the last few weeks, but there was something about his demeanor or the way he phrased his words that made her very uncomfortable.

She quickly pulled away from him, and saw the pure determination in his eyes.

"Call me if you need anything."

Sara was always rushing off when things became too much. He was kind of glad, because he wasn't sure if he could handle someone else's problems. Even if he was the cause of them.

Nick didn't give her an answer, just a quick nod. She let herself out and he was alone again.

All of a sudden he felt very drained and he got ready for sleep. Nick lit some of the candles and crawled into bed. It felt strange when his weight caused the mattress to creak. He curled up on his side, sans sleeping pills, minus anit-anxiety medication. No, he was going to this on his own.

The glow from the candles was not exactly the cure all he had been seeking. However, they were soft, and filled the room with a sense of warmth. After two hours, he couldn't keep his heavy eyelids open anymore and drifted off to sleep.

Three weeks. Twenty-one days. Five hundred and four hours.

Nick Stokes had fallen asleep in his own bed. He had only gone four hours when he woke with a start in a cold sweat. He stumbled out of his bedroom, and grabbed a bottle of water out of his fridge. He drank the cool liquid and let out a long sigh.

He wandered barefoot over to his counter and marked off the current obstacle on his path. He may not have slept the whole night, but he did drift off in his own bed. Something he had not accomplished in a long time.

He placed the check next to that task with a small, hollow smile.

It was after all some progress and that was all that mattered to him.

* * *

Nick looked at his watch. He had several hours till Warrick's usual after shift visit. Nick tried to recall if Greg was tagging along or if he had a date with one of the new lab techs. His weekly reports of the newest array of lovely women, made Nick chuckle sometimes. Greg had invited him out to hang out with a small group of them, but he just wasn't in a sociable mood. 

In retrospect, it was perhaps that he wasn't in the mood to hang out with _new_ CSI employees. These were people he had never meet before. He was sure they knew all about him, and that was what made the subject such a moot point. His life had been on the cover of many newspapers. Nick was absolutely sure he was a main subject of gossip at work. He didn't want to be the center of attention at some social gathering or ...ever. He'd accept the weariness of being whispered about when he returned to to the Lab, but not right now.

His therapist thought perhaps he was being a bit paranoid. That after nearly five weeks his coworkers would have better things to discuss. In the back of the Nick's mind, he knew that his antics in the box were just too juicy to pass up. He was sure his team mates didn't let slip some of his more troubling ordeals, but that meant with a void like that, certain employees would just make up the rest.

Nick was in normal street clothes. A long sleeved red shirt, a comfortable set of jeans, and he grabbed a light weight jacket, with the words Foresincs printed in the top right shoulder. He even grabbed his hat with the same words on the front of it. It was like wearing his normal clothes for work, and this next "challenge" was one of the last he felt he needed to overcome.

He grabbed his gun and checked the safety before sliding it in his holster. He glanced at his watch, just a bit past 4 a.m. The criminalist entered his truck, adjusted the dial to an old country and western station, and drove to his destination. He had been cruising around a lot this week. He no longer needed a 'baby-sitter' along with his sessions of late.

He left his therapist's office with much less anxiety. No more trembling hands, or fits of depression that were often followed by utter silence. This always caused who ever's turn it was to accompany him, to feel even more anxious around him.

Nick drove along, maneuvering his vehicle past the little amount of traffic past the strip. His mind was very acutely focused on what he had to do tonight. His first evaluation to return to work was next week. If he received a clean mill of mental health, then he could return back to his job within a few days.

Six weeks. By the seventh week, he could be back to his routine before his life had been thrown into a black pit of chaos. Nick noticed the parking lot and slowly pulled in. His adrenaline started to surge through his body, and he stepped out from the truck, as casually as possible. He scanned the area, no one else was here and he pressed the little button to his remote and locked he truck.

His feet crunched on the asphalt as he took in the area. He placed his hand above his hip. The butt of his gun felt reassuring against his fingers. Nick continued walking past the street lights, and inched closer to the alleyway. The CSI cast a backwards look behind him, no movement around. Only silence surrounded him. He licked dry lips, his deep brown eyes taking in every detail in front of him.

He stopped for a moment and looked down at the ground, noting all old the tar and concrete. There was nothing out of the ordinary around. Cigarette butts littered the ground, an old discarded coke bottle rolled a little with the breeze. Nick took a long deep breath, and walked some more.

He came across the edge of the alley, near a familiar rail. He lowered himself to his haunches, and looked at the empty space in front of him. Nick felt his pule beating along the side of his neck, his heart thundered. But, he kept his breathing, deep and regular. He stared down at his hands, they remained still.

The criminalist didn't know how long he stayed in his crouched position. He just listened to the night, taking all the sounds in the distance. He must have zoned out for a while, dark and scary images flashed through his mind. All the while, he made his intake of breath as steady as possible.

Time ceased to exist. Nick listened to his heart slow down to a more normal pace, in line with his breathing. The wind blew around, dust, little bits of gravel around his feet, but he just stayed low, almost motionless.

Then as his body relaxed he heard the distinct noise of a car engine and the sounds of tire on pavement. His eyes flew open and he spun around to face the approaching vehicle, his hand a few inches away from his gun.

A patrol car rolled past his truck in the distance and came closer. A flashlight shone in the darkness, the bright light hitting him in the face as the patrol car got nearer. Nick shielded his eyes, and the car stopped a few feet away.

An officer carefully exited his car, the flashlight still shined towards him. Nick could hear the foot steps.

"Care to tell me what you are doing out here, Sir?" A low-bass voice asked.

Nick stood up, his hand fell to his side, and he walked closer to the man. His heart was beating a bit faster, his breathing had increased slightly. Which was of course a bit confusing as he walked closer to a fellow law officer.

"Just out for a night walk." He said, his twang a bit more pronounced.

Nick stepped in the policeman's line of vision.

The officer lowered his light and looked at the CSI a bit confused. "Stokes?"

Nick chuckled to himself. He recognized officer Toby. "Yeah."

"What the Hell are you doing out here, man?" The older cop looked around. "By yourself in the middle of the night?"

Nick shrugged. "Just needed some time to think, I guess."

The Texan smiled warmly, the man in front of him seemed to relax a bit.

"Well, its a bit strange is all." The police officer stepped closer and eyed the criminalist with a little scrutiny. "You okay?"

Nick guessed he better get used to that question. "Yep." Was his short reply.

"Okay, man. Just you spooked me." Officer Toby studied the area, his facial expressions still showed the strains of trying to seem nonchalant. "Don't know why you'd want to come back here."

Nick's grin was now a bit forced. "Just something that needed to be done."

The CSI didn't stick around for anymore small talk. That unnerving feeling was back. The same thing that kept him from hanging out with Greg and some of his new associates.

"I've got to get goin." Nick nodded.

"Sure thing, Stokes. ...Um, see you around soon."

Nick walked past the officer. "Maybe next week," he called out over his shoulder. The criminalist got back in his truck and headed home.

* * *

Nick parked his truck and put the gear in place. He stared out his wind shield, towards his townhouse. He noticed Warrick's car a few feet away. His friend must have wrapped up his shift earlier than normal. 'Slow night,' he thought.

Nick killed the engine and sat silently in his seat. He looked down at his hands and noticed the slight tremor. He scrunched up his face in confusion. Nick balled both hands into fists, and then uncurled them several times.

He shook his head and wandered to his door. Warrick and Greg both had keys, so he let himself inside. He went though the foyer and found Warrick on his cell phone in the midst of finishing a phone call.

"Yeah..never mind. Yeah." His partner clicked the his cell off.

The lanky man eyed his friend. "Where were you at?" Warrick looked own at his watch. "At 5 am?"

Nick rolled his eyes. "Sorry if I'm out past my bed time. Won't happen again." Nick mocked as he took off his jacket.

Warrick strolled over with a serious look on his face. He noticed Nick's weapon and watched him as he unpacked it and put it back inside the drawer of his little table.

"Where'd you go that you felt that your piece was needed?" Warrick's tone was all business.

Nick brushed past him and started digging around in his kitchen as he tried to formulate an answer.

"Just needed to do something." Nick turned around and leaned against his counter as he munched on an apple. "If I recall, it was a certain someone who said he'd always be packing when he went out." Nick took a bite of the fruit. "Its late. Just wanted to be careful."

Warrick wasn't buying any of this cool and collected act. "Exactly." The other criminalist seemed to wrestle with his next set of words. "Look man. You're a grown adult. Don't matter what you do. But, when its the middle of the night, I just get..."

"I'm not gonna get nabbed by some bogeyman, bro. There were some things I needed to do. Clear my head a bit." Nick discarded his snack. "I'm going to try to go back to work in a week or so." Nick shrugged. "Carrying my gun is just part of getting back into the swing of things."

Warrick could tell his buddy was holding something back. However, if Nick was not in the mood to share. He wasn't going to start an argument pushing the wrong buttons.

"You think under two months is enough?" Warrick asked in concern.

Nick gave him a very serious expression. "Its been close to six weeks. In a few days, it'll be seven. I'm going stir crazy, man. I've attended every therapy session. I'm not taking any medications anymore." Nick looked at Warrick right in the eye, unblinking. "I've made a ton of progress."

Nick still had to pop one of his anti anxiety meds ever once in a while. The lack of sleeping pills as his regular nightly diet was a very new thing, but it was on the list. So, it was okay in his book. It wasn't exactly a lie.

Warrick wanted to give Nick as much encouragement as possible. He wasn't really bowled over by the notion that his friend wanted to return to work so soon. However, even Warrick didn't know when exactly was the proper amount of time to recover from such an ordeal. He wasn't about to begrudge Nick his need to return to something he valued so highly as a sign of normalacy.

Warrick shook his head. "So, what's on deck for today?"

Nick smiled. "Gris got me a DVD from the San Francisco Zoo. An entomologist buddy of his works there and got one of the guys who runs the Wings Over the World Exhibit to send me some of their stuff."

Warrick tried not to look horrified by the idea of yet another collection of movies on birds. But if that is what Nick wanted to watch. It was his place.

Nick went to his counter to try to find the package that contained the DVDs. He sifted through some of the papers around and his hand touched his list. He looked over at Warrick who had made himself at home in the loveseat in the corner. Nick often thought of that as his partner's chair now. He looked down and saw the second to last thing written on it.

He quickly jotted down a big check mark. He was ready to go back now. Every obstacle had been successfully completed in his mind. All he had to do was pass his physical, which would be a breeze. He had nothing but time to work out at home. His mental proficiency test would be all that was need to get back to work.

The old Nick Stokes was only a week away from returning. The CSI smiled at his list. He wandered back into the living room.

Seven weeks. Forty-nine days.One thousand one hundred and seventy-six hours since the incident.

tbc...

* * *

Author's notes: Hope everyone is still enjoying this. Consider this a turning point chapter in this story. This may not be the most exciting or dramatic piece of post GD, but one I hope has more than one theme, and a few hidden layers underneath. Shacky and I want to thank you for the continued support. I've noticed a ton of new faces, which is really neat, and hope the rest of the group is having fun. 

Mad Maggie:

Good to see you again. I'm happy that everything seemed to flow well, its been great co-writing this with Shacky and we plan on covering a decent amount of ground.

sokerfreak-

Thank you. Hope you enjoy the regular postings.

Tilly

Storm clouds can be hidden, they often roar around, but you never know when the rain is coming. Thank you.

everybettty-

The bathtub scene was one I wrestled with for a while. I want to keep this real, little things that Nick doesn't expect that might trigger something no matter how hard he tries to ignore it. However, its a hard balance to keep things believable, without going into soap opera land.

new creation-

Thanks for all the reviews on the past stories, I've never gotten a chance to thank you for the feedback. You're compliment really means a lot. Glad our guys are acting a true fashion.

Karen-

Thank you. You must catch CSI on reruns on Spike TV or rent the dvds. Its amazing to capture a new reader, and its neat to see that GD was your fist eppy.

Bebob-

Yes, Nick is quite nice on the eyes. Thank you.

Kittyluv-

Thank you. We're trying to keep the posts every two days barring any issues with the site.

Poncholives-

I think each team member has their own way of coping or perhaps not dealing with the aftermath of the attack. Nick is still trying to get back on that horse, he just doesn't know how difficult that might be this time around.

Katknits-

I love giving little peeks into what I think Nick does on his time off, or what his interests are. I adore the Warrick and Nick friendship, those guys have a great bond.

Kasey-

I know Nick might not look too fondly on breaking down I front of Warrick, but these guys are close, and they will always be there for each other.

Tvspaz-

No promises on endings, but my goal has always been to create a satisfying conclusion. I think Shacky and I will be able to provide that with a few bumps in the road.

Jewlbaby-

Thanks my dear.

Amy-

Its the simple things that I think tend to trip people up. Thank you, I always look forward to your thoughts.

Staresp4cat-

Thank you for your continued support. Glad you're like the newsest endavous, its been fun writing this with Shacky.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8 by Shacky**

* * *

Nick had never been so happy to see the lab.

After two months and three days sitting at home, he couldn't wait for his first night of work. He never liked the swing shift. He'd worked nights for almost seven years, he liked it. It felt as if he really was returning to his old job by coming back to graveyard. There was a bounce in his step that hadn't been there since last November when Ecklie broke them up.

He walked through the doors back as Stokes, CSI Level 3. Capable, confidant, and most importantly, cleared for duty.

Sure he fudged a little on a couple of his "tests" but that was between him and his closet. He wasn't going to share that information with anyone. He just wanted back into the real world so badly, get back to his "before" life as he had termed it. Before that dreaded night. Nick didn't like to use the word kidnapping because that made him feel more like a victim, and he was tired of being a victim.

Nick had a grin on his face as he walked up the steps towards the Lab. He walked down the halls and saw faces he didn't remember seeing before his "leave," but they seemed to know him. It seemed like everywhere he looked someone stole a glance at him. He even caught two women pointing his direction as he walked by. He gave them a quick nod and fake grin, and started walking faster toward Grissom and Catherine's offices. That is where he was first to report. Both Greg and Warrick had warned him about this, he was the talk of the Lab still, their own local celebrity. Great, just want he didn't want.

The unfamiliar eyes were making him nervous, Nick felt his heart start beating fast at the unexpected scrutiny from the one place that felt more like home than his own house did most of the time. He needed to find his team. They would all be here and they were a unit again. That thought put a smile back on his face as he walked into Grissom's office.

Both Grissom and Catherine were there waiting for him. Grissom held out his hand, which Nick took in a firm handshake. "Can't tell you how good it is to have you back on nights, Nicky. We've all certainly missed having you around." Grissom couldn't hide the grin that broke out on his face at having his whole team back together for the first time in months.

"You don't know how good it is to be back, Gris. I don't think I've ever been so happy to see this place." Now that Nick was in familiar surroundings and people, he was beaming.

"Glad to have you back at work Nicky, it hasn't been the same these past couple of months." Catherine said as she gave him a quick hug. "You are looking well and rested."

Which was true, he had finally healed from the bites that marred and burned his flesh for weeks. All the wounds were on the inside now, and no one was going to know they were there unless he wanted them to know.

"Well, you get two months paid leave and you'll find there isn't much to do but rest most of the time."

"Then down to business. We do have a little of that to take care of." Grissom stated matter of factly. "We need to go over the conditions of your return back to work."

"Yes, Sir, I know." Nick had been told the regulations before, but he knew they had to go over them verbally before start of shift.

"Okay, for starters Nicky," Catherine started "Absolutely no overtime for first week, eight hour shifts only."

Nick shifted his eyes at her. "No back talk Nick, this is how it has to be." Catherine instructed.

"I know, I'm just ready to get back. All right, what else?" Nick said, clapping his hands and rubbing them together.

"First week as you know you will be staying in the Lab, doing only lab work. After the first week, the three of us will meet again and talk about you getting back into the field." Grissom could see Nick's jaw tighten, but cut him off before he could start in. "I know you're not happy about that, but it has to be this way. We see no reason you cannot go back out into the field after your first week."

"You mean unless I freak out on everyone and start screaming or something." Nick couldn't help but feel a little bitter about that, and he couldn't keep it out of his voice. He was never good at hiding his emotions.

"No, that isn't what it means, Nick." Catherine interjected. "This is just protocol and you know it. I know you're eager to get back to your job, we all want you back, but we just don't want to push too hard all at once. " She tried to explain as calmly and by the book as possible.

"I know Cath, I'm sorry. Didn't mean to snap at you." He hadn't been relegated to lab duty since he didn't pass his weapon's proficiency test last fall, and that was only for one case.

She understood, but they had to do this right, both supervisors wanted to make sure their Nick was really okay for themselves if they were truly honest. The therapist's recommendations just gave them an easy out.

"And then you will also need to see your therapist at least once a week during the first month and she will keep us updated on your progress. If she sees no complications or setbacks with your return to work and the field, then after the appropriate time, you will be able to return to a schedule with the rest of the team. But only at her approval, Nick. Is that understood?" Catherine tried to keep it cool as possible.

Nick didn't speak but nodded his head because he had been informed that his bosses would be kept informed of his progress so they could up his workload, which is exactly what he wanted.

"Just sign this so it proves we had this talk and get down to the break room. Greg's making some fresh coffee just for you, he's glad your back on night's I think." Gil instructed.

Nick reached for his pen and scribbled his name across the line confirming they had the discussion of the "Resuming of Duties of CSI Level Three Nicholas Stokes". He looked at the top again, and grinned, he was back, and handed the copy back to Grissom.

"Go get your coffee Nick. There's no hurry getting to the Lab, nothing will be in yet for a while. We haven't had assignments handed out yet."

"Thanks guys," Nick said, as he stood up and started towards the door. "Thanks for everything. I wouldn't be back here it wasn't for you two, and I know thank you isn't enough." Nick was not going to emotional on his first night back.

"Nick, it was a team effort, and you are one of us. It wasn't the same here without you, and now that we are all back, we all couldn't be happier to have you back safe and healthy. Just take care of yourself and let us worry about the rest. Now go get your coffee." Catherine explained in a soft tone.

"Yes, Sir. Ma'am." With that, he walked out his superior's door and towards the break room. He could already smell the coffee down the hallway.

He poked his head in kind of quietly just watching Greg stand there, bouncing his head to some music that was only playing in his head as he retrieved two cups for coffee. Nick knew one of those was meant for him and couldn't help but smile.

"Is that the famous Sanders' coffee I smell or are my senses deceiving me?" He joked, as Greg whipped his head around, his face breaking out in a grin from ear to ear.

"Nothing but the best for you, dude." He said as he walked over to give Nick a quick guy hug, and the obligatory pat on the back. "Damn it's good to see you back here. God it's been so boring and quiet, and it's great to have you back on nights. All of this estrogen was starting to wear on me."

They grabbed their coffees and sat on the couch in the break room to catch up before assignments were handed out.

"I can imagine. It was getting a little crowded with just the three of us. Honestly I always kind of felt like the odd man out between Cath and Warrick." Nick confessed before he realized it.

"We have five minutes for office gossip, so give." Greg looked so excitedly.

"Not going there man, nope, not going at all."

"Damn tease, so how are you really doing, none of this bullshit. You look a lot better." Greg was being sincere, he didn't want the front; he wanted the truth.

"I'm doing all right," at Greg's skeptical look he tried again. "No man, I serious. Not gonna lie to you. I have my moments where I get a little shaky, but this is a big thing for me. Coming back to work on nights. Seems like a lot has changed around here since I left." Nick didn't want to admit he felt uncomfortable at the looks and obvious stares by strangers who just happened to work in the same building.

"Yeah, they hired quite a few new techs you haven't met yet, but they sure know you. You have been quite the talk around here lately." Greg wanted to let Nick know in case he saw the stares.

"I kind of got that feeling walking in. I just want to work G, not cause a fuss." Nick seemed defeated a little and Greg caught it quickly.

"I know that man, I know. It should calm down here a little after a couple of days. They have just heard about you in the news and stuff. Actually a couple of the new girls thought they would be nice and throw you a welcome back party, but I kind of put a stop to it. Hope you don't mind." Greg looked up at Nick sheepishly, hoping he didn't overstep his bounds with his friend.

"You put a stop to a party? Are you slipping, G? I can't imagine you would ever not want a party." Nick teased back, but in all honesty he was glad Greg did that for him. He didn't want to be the center of attention.

He just wanted to get back to his life, from before that night.

"I know being the life of every party and all, but I told them you weren't that kind of guy. If they knew you at all, they would know that would be the last thing you would want. I don't think I made too many friends that day."

"Well, I appreciate it man. The last thing I want is some big deal made out of me coming back to work. It's what I'm supposed to do. So thanks, I don't want any fanfare." Nick was thankful his friend had put his foot down about that.

"No problem Nick, but that doesn't mean that I couldn't get a new toy for you now that we are all back on nightshift. I figured we could break it in this week since you'll be in the Lab and have some time to kill." Greg handed a package over to Nick he had to the side of the couch.

"G, what is this? I don't want any welcome back gifts for goodness sakes." Nick couldn't believe what Greg had done.

"Well, that's too bad cause it's not just for you, since you, me, and Warrick are all back working the same shift, I though we could use a new system around here. Man, Dreamcast is so 2000."

Nick opened up the box and saw a brand new PS2 still in the box. Plus three new games, Madden 2005, NCAA College Football 05, and NASCAR 2005. He had to admit he was pretty excited about the new break room toy. Now that they were all back together again, they could goof off on their rare slow nights or just take breaks together again.

"Thanks man, this is great. Maybe you could sneak in some practice on those Patriots of yours after that ass kicking you too not too long back." Nick joked.

"Yeah yeah, you keep talking, but we all know who rules." Greg looked at his watch. "Well, I gotta get. I'm sure Gris is getting ready to handout assignments and I know you are gonna want to settle into your temporary digs for the week." Greg got up and dumped his coffee in the sink, and laughed to himself.

"What's so funny man?" Nick wondered what Greg could possibly have to laugh about.

"Nothing, just thinking about this situation. Look at us, here I am going to get my assignment for the night, and you're off to the Lab, kind of ironic isn't it?"

"Yeah, don't get too used to it. Only one week, and I'll be out in the field. Gotta get my feet wet again slowly, you know the routine."

"All to well my friend, take care, and don't take shit from Hodges, he's all talk." Greg yelled as he headed out of the break room as Warrick and Sara quickly came in for a quick cup of coffee before grabbing their assignments. They looked happy Nick thought; he hadn't realized how much of a toll the split had taken on the team.

"Hey look who's back! Good to see you man." Warrick grabbed his hand as Nick stood up.

"Great to be back man, I only wish I could be out with you guys tonight."

"It won't be too long and you'll be digging through human soup again." Sara swooped in for a quick hug.

"Listen bro, we gotta get a move on, Grissom handing out assignments and we just came in to grab some of Greg's coffee. One good thing about having Sanders around again, gotta love his coffee."

Warrick and Sara were out the door, leaving Nick alone in his thoughts. He really didn't want to go to the Lab, but anything to get back into the field, and it was only one week he thought.

He walked into the Lab. "Well, you guys are stuck with me for a week." Nick stated simply, as he grabbed his own dark blue Labcoat. "So, where do I start?"

* * *

By the third night he was getting tired of only seeing the CSI's as they brought him evidence to process. They did it with heavy hearts knowing how much Nick wanted back in the field. But they also knew this was a necessary step to get back out there. Nick was really getting tired of the Lab rats, only Jacqui made it bearable because she treated him like she always did.

He didn't understand why he couldn't get back out. He knew it had only been three days but he had been fine. He wasn't having any problems in the lab, and he was starting to get bored with it. The same thing over and over, never getting to leave.

No wonder Greg wanted out so bad. Hodges was as short and curt as Nick remembered, but at least he didn't change. Archie was still cool and laid back, even though Nick knew Archie was one of the Techs that got an up close seat to his nightmare. The Asian didn't look at him different, or pity him. They talked about cases and Star Trek and the new game system Greg had bought for everyone.

He still felt like he was being watched inside his own place of work. Some people he didn't recognize would walk by quickly and stare at him. The glass, the Plexiglas. Nick didn't notice before, there was glass everywhere. He never looked up long enough to think about it. It wasn't really that dissimilar, he could see through it, but he could also be seen. He was like the specimen again, being watched and stared at. He quickly shook himself from his thoughts; he wasn't going down that road again.

But for the rest for the rest of the week he made sure never to look up through the glass walls. Ever. He wasn't a show for anyone to see, he wasn't a freak to be put out on display as every emotion rolled through his mind. Not by his bosses, his teammates, and damn well not by a bunch of strangers that looked at him like he was untouchable, behind the glass of his new confines. Four more days, he could do four more days, just as long as he kept his head down and focused on the evidence to be processed.

* * *

The last day in the Lab was the longest eight hours he had spent since, well since ...

He wanted out of here... Away from the confines of this place. Both Grissom and Catherine told him they saw no reason why he couldn't be released for field duty after tonight's shift. He almost wished they would have informed him after shift because it made the last eight hours of lab work seem like eight days. He wanted back out in the field so bad, he could hardly stand still to process evidence. He was excited, anxious and happy all rolled into one hyper ball of energy. He hadn't felt this good since he learned the team was getting back together.

After shift hey all decided to go out for breakfast to celebrate Nick's return to the field. It was like old times. They headed to their favorite spot, even Doc Robbins and Brass came along. The gang was all there. They were laughing the morning away over coffee and cases Nick had missed out on while he had been gone. He didn't feel bad for once. He loved hearing about life going on, and to be caught up and be one of them again. He ate his omelet and hash browns down like he was a starved man.

"What Nicky, didn't anybody feed you while you where home?" Catherine teased at the blushing criminalist.

"Nothing this good. I missed this greasy place. And it just feels great being back here with you guys, you have no idea."

"I think we do Nicky, we all missed you these past two months, it hasn't been complete without you back on the night shift."

Grissom stated as best he could. He still wasn't as free with his emotions as the rest of the team, but he learned a lot during the rescue as well. One person couldn't do it alone. Human contact and companionship were as important as anything. He'd forgotten that for a while, but he never intended to let that happen again.

Warrick lifted his coffee cup "To Nick, CSI Level 3 back in action." Followed by several rounds of "To Nick!"

With the clinking up coffee mugs Nick felt like he was finally putting all of this behind him. It has been two months, one week, and three days. He was getting past it and moving on, letting it go, and he hadn't felt this alive since before that night. He grinned so hard to thought his face would hurt.

The waitress came back to their tables clearing their breakfast plates and refilling their coffee cups one more time. Nick noticed something was off, something in the air... something smelled wrong, but he couldn't place it.

"Here's your check ya'll, just let me know when you're ready for me to take it." She grinned and then Nick saw it, knew what he was smelled.

She was popping bubble gum. He hadn't even thought about it since that night, that sweet sickly smell, the thickness of it in his mouth as he chewed it quickly in his rush to get that damn light off. Shoving the sticky pink stuff into his own ears to muffle the gunshots knew he was getting ready to fire.

In the background he could hear Grissom, Catherine, and Brass fighting over who was going get to pay for 'Nicky's Breakfast Celebration.' Nick could feel his stomach turn over as he saw that pink bubble gum popping between her teeth, that ghastly smell wafting towards him.

Greg saw Nick visibly pale and instantly grew worried but didn't let on to anyone else. They were too busy having fun talking about next week's work and still fighting over the check.

"If you'll excuse me I'll be right back." Nick said hurriedly and rushed off towards the men's room unnoticed by most at the table who were wrapped up in their own conversations.

Greg quickly excused himself too because from the look on Nick's face he knew something had triggered a bad memory and something was desperately wrong all of a sudden. He waved Warrick down, who noticed Nick's change in mood as well and took after his friend.

Nick had barely made it to the bathroom in time before the contents of this morning's celebration meal was emptied in the toilet. He kept retching until he was sure everything he had eaten within the last three days was out of his body. He was soaked in sweat and couldn't stop shaking. The shakes didn't help settle his stomach as another round of dry heaves ravaged his already tired body. In the background he thought he heard water running but he wasn't sure. He laid his head against the cool porcelain afraid to move, afraid that it would start another round of heaving.

He heard a soft knock on the stall door. "Nick, it's Greg, it's only me. I'm coming in."

No 'May I come in', no 'are you ok', just I'm coming in. Nick liked that idea, didn't want to have to think, just wanted not move.

He felt the air change and Greg squatted down next to him and placed a cool wet paper towel across his forehead, and another across the back of is neck. Nick gingerly moved to wipe his mouth with his shirtsleeve, he still had some dignity, or at least he liked to think so.

Greg sat up and went over and threw the towels in the toilet and flushed them and the offending contents away.

"Just stay right there, I'll be right back, Nick."

Greg placed a reassuring hand on Nick's shoulder gently and walked back out and double-checked to make sure the door was locked. He didn't want to be disturbed or add to Nick's embarrassment. He grabbed two more paper towels and wetted them down as before and retuned to Nick who was now sitting up and leaning his head against the stall.

Greg took the cool paper and wiped down his forehead again, trying to cool off his friend. He tried to bring some color back to Nick's face and calm him down. He sat next to him on the floor, didn't say anything, he figured Nick would talk when he was ready.

After about five minutes of calming down and regaining his composure, Nick looked over at Greg.

"Thanks man, I'm sorry, I uh, I don't know what happened. God I feel so humiliated." Nick hung his head between his knees and looked like a kid who had just broke his parent's window with a baseball.

Greg understand what it was like and wanted to be there. "Hey man, you have nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing to be sorry about. I know what it's like man. What was it? Something brought a vivid memory back right?"

Nick just looked at him and wondered when Greg developed the ability to read minds, but still didn't say a word.

Greg took the initiative. "For me it was something small. I thought I was over it, forgot all about the explosion, moved on, gotten past it, all of that bullshit. Then the stupidest thing set me off." Greg just looked down and laughed softly to himself at the memory.

"It was Thanksgiving that fall. I was home actually, one of the few times I got back for a holiday. Did I ever tell you my Mom is not the best cook, well she's not. She forgot how long to cook the turkey. When she took it out, it was burned to a crisp and everything."

Greg paused as he gathered his thoughts. "The smell. All I could smell was charred, burned, turkey skin. I was completely lost in the memory, the smell, the flash, the feel of glass surrounding me, my skin smelling like that. I was right back there, because of a damned burned turkey. I made it to the bathroom just in time and threw up everything I had eaten in the past week I think. I was so embarrassed. I was supposed to be over it, it had been six months."

Greg sighed. "Its always the little things."

Nick just looked over at Greg, realizing how little he knew the explosion had affected his friend.

"Bubble gum, the waitress was chewing bubble gum. I uh, I had my gum in my pocket with me down there. I didn't even think about it until I was going to shoot out that light. I didn't want to hurt my eardrums in case I actually got out. I stuffed it in my ears." Nick almost chuckled. "Pretty stupid, huh?"

"No man, not stupid at all. Hell, I wouldn't have even thought of something like that. You used your head, and saved your hearing. I can't promise you that there won't be little things like this that catch you off guard and can send you right back to that place, but I can tell you that they will start happening less and less often. That one day, you'll get a craving for bubble gum and it won't make your stomach turn, and it will taste good again. It took me another year before I could eat turkey."

They both laughed at that, because Nick realized that Greg was right, and maybe one day he would like bubble gum again, cause if Greg could eat turkey, he could chew gum.

"Hey Greg, would you mind if, uh if, we..." He couldn't quite get the words out. He didn't need to.

"No problem man, I'll keep it between us. That's what friends are for, right?" Greg looked over at Nick who just nodded

"Thanks man, I don't want them worrying, thinking I'm not ready to be back out there yet."

"Hey, one has nothing to do with the other. It just takes some time, now you ready to return to your party." Greg stood up and offered his friend a hand up.

When they got back to the table, Greg was afraid that Nick's panic attack would be hard to keep quiet. His face still had a grayish pallor to it, plus he was slightly shaking, which was hard to hide. But he promised his friend and he would be his best to keep in between the two of them.

"So, when did guys start going to the bathrooms in groups?" Sara piped in keeping with the light mood.

Greg chimed in quickly so Nick wouldn't have to think to fast on his feet. "Well, when you gotta go you gotta go. Plus I needed Nick's opinion on the new hairstyle, and that's something guys just don't do in public." He hoped the light tone he was keeping was being sold to the group and Nick slight smile gave them no reason to doubt him.

"Yeah, the many styles of Greggo, I told him he just needed to go short like me, wouldn't have to worry about it then." Nick decided to help his friend out as since it was Greg's covering for him.

"Are you OK Nick, you don't look so good?" Catherine couldn't help but notice the color of Nick's skin and the sweat on his brow.

"Yeah, I'm uh, I'm fine, just a little tired, long shift, and my celebration, just a little worn out I think."

Nick fidgeted in his seat a little and stole a quick glance at his friends and plastered a smile on his face.

"Nick man, are you sure, you don't look so good, maybe you should have someone drive you home." Warrick couldn't keep the worried tone out of his voice.

"I said I'm fine Rick, do you all you need my therapist's note for that also? I'm just tired, thanks for the get together guys, but I'm beat and ready to go home."

"Oaky Nick, if you need anything . . . ." Warrick tried to say quickly before Nick was gone.

He just looked back at his friends and said "I won't," and continued to walk out the door, leaving several of his friend a little stunned, except for Greg, who understood and knew he just needed to be alone.

* * *

Nick made it home by himself just fine like he knew he would. He just wanted to shower and sleep. He went into the bathroom, and took off his clothes. He opened his shower curtain, and thought back to that night with Warrick. He felt so humiliated and ashamed having his friend witness him like that. It wasn't bad enough he saw every moment of suffering in the ground, he had to put on another freak show for Warrick. He thought about that night and stared at the bathtub, the shower could wait until later he decided.

He just wanted sleep now, so he gave in to his weakness, and grabbed his prescription bottle, which he rarely touched. He opened it and let a sleeping pill fall into his hand.

"What the Hell." He said to himself in the mirror. He tossed it into his mouth and took a quick swig of water and swallowed them down. That should help he decided, he earned a peaceful sleep after this week.

Nick walked into the bedroom, pulled down his blackout curtains, and then turned his cell phone off. He didn't want anybody checking up on him. He turned off his light and crawled into bed and slept.

* * *

Author's notes: Shacky and I want to thank everyone again for all the feedback. We will be doing every other chapter from now on.

Designation:

Very perceptive. Yep, "Progress" is in the eye of the beholder.

Bebob-

Thank you very much. Shacky really got the ball rolling on Nick's moves to going back to work.

Jewelbaby-

Thanks. We all ready have the chapters all ready written with our names. Its just copy and past. Plus I tried your suggestion earlier and it never worked.

New Creation-

Thanks, that's a really sweet thought. I don't know if the cast would want me to write scripts, I'm too mean.

Ponchlives-

Thanks. Things will be interesting for Nick and the Team now he's back at work. Shacky touched in it a bit at the end.

anmani-

Shacky and I thank you for such lovely comments. I hope you get to see GD soon, since its been so inspirational.

everybetty-

Since we control this little CSI world, Shacky and I didn't want to dwell with the Kelly visit. I know, not canon, but we just didn't want to touch that. Thanks, glad you liked the last chapter.

Csixmiss-

Glad you take the time to comment, we worked for over two months on this. Glad you enjoy the details, we really wanted to go over many aspects.

Amy-

Nick's in this weird little in between state. I think it will be his friends that now have the biggest impact on his continued recovery. But I'm not saying how. Shacky left a few clues in this chapter.

Ciara-

We both thank you.

Kasy-

We both thank you. Yes, it takes time to recover from something like this.

September-

Thank you. Our focus is really on Nick, Greg and Warrick We though of more of the cast, but then this would be like 25 chapters long :-) Hope you still enjoy it.

Rozzy-

I think you hit the nail on the head. Its all about control...however we'll see who can handle and who cannot. ou're always very perceptive.

Higherbeingfriendsfan-

Thank you. He is back at work, here is to his continued progress.

Nickgilgreg- Thank you. Nick is very strong man, he would not have survived if he were not.

groban-

Drama? Us? What is this word drama:-)


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 by Kristen**

* * *

It was his sixth night of being back at work. He loved being back out in the field, but the cases they kept handing him were getting old. One B and E after another. He knew they were handing him softball assignments, he was a CSI still, and seemed to think other people forgot that. He was sitting at the table sipping coffee and taped his fingers against the table with pent up energy at finding out about his assignment for the night.

Warrick popped his head into the break room waving a piece of paper in the air. "Come Nicky, let's get a move on, we got a B and E down at a pet store. Let's get."

Nick didn't know whether to laugh or scream. Sighing deeply, he pushed aside the dark thoughts that continued to plague him.

Progress, it was all progress.

Nick's face scrunched up. "Did you say a pet store, Rick?" Nick couldn't keep the astoundment out of his tone.

He laughed at the craziness of it.

* * *

Nick and Warrick wandered through the parking lot towards their vehicle. Both criminalists headed for the driver's door, with the intent of getting in. Both men gave each other a knowing look, as each refused to back down.

Nick chuckled under his breath. "I see we're at a standstill over who's driving."

Nick opened his left palm and made a fist with his right hand as he gestured for their usual game of paper rock, scissors to determine who was going to be the alpha male on this trip.

Warrick snorted and simply yanked open the door and slide into the driver's seat. "No calls on this one partner."

Nick just gaped at the other CSI. "Now that's just cold, man," he said, as he walked over to the other side of the SUV.

Warrick didn't comment as he drove towards their destination. He wasn't in the mood lately over games of chance. If Nick picked up on this irrational behavior he didn't let on.

Nick on the other hand just stared out the window. "Jungle Mania" was on the other side of town. He couldn't recall how many breaking an enterings, assaults, suspicious circumstances and other odd cases he had been assigned to of late. One thing that did occur to him, every single case this past week, he always rode with Warrick.

Of course following his provisions for ebbing back into the field he knew solo work was a long way off, but he wondered who insisted on Warrick Brown's presences at every scene. If both his supervisors were assigning the details, or if his partner had insisted. His gut told him the latter, and this made him feel slightly uneasy. His partner was going to have to let go of the guilt that was crushing him like some dead weight sooner or later. Nick had tried to talk to him about it, but his partner was just as good as he was, at avoiding subjects that were not up for discussion.

Nick felt that Warrick would eventualy let things go, or they were going to have to sit down and talk about it. Nick smiled. Maybe he would challenge Rick to a basketball game and then it would just be the two guys, a court, and both of their bottled up emotions.

Warrick continued to glance over at his partner. "You still brooding over not drivin'?"

Nick actually laughed out loud. "Nope. Just psyching myself up for our next case." Nick looked to see his partner's frustrated expression.

Nick sighed; he really wasn't all that upset over their newest softball assignment. Maybe changing tactics would be a good thing he mused. "A robbery at an exotic pet store. Our bad guy must be other really bored, or just plain stupid."

Warrick pulled into the lot of their next scene. "You kiddin' me, man? I expect you to be like some kid at a candy store. Birds, fish, lizards, turtles, snakes, and even some stuff that might fall under Grissom's area of expertise."

Nick allowed a slightly amused grin. Both men meet Detective O'Reilly at the door who filled them in.

The gruff cop didn't hide his less than thrilled attitude over the situation. "Silent alarm was triggered. I rolled and found the place pretty intact. Safe was opened, a couple hundred dollars stolen."

Warrick nodded. "Was the safe forced?"

The older man shrugged. " Nope, looks like someone who had the combination."

"Inside job more than likely." Nick mused.

"I'd agree. Owner came down just a little while ago to take inventory on some of his stock. Said some pretty expensive fish and lizards were missing." O'Reilly signaled for them to enter the store.

Both criminalists followed carrying their kits. A man in his early fifties with short silver hair and glasses was pacing up and down in front of his counter, wringing his hands. As he saw the trio approach, he became very animated. "Finally, some people who might expedite this situation. Not only have I been Shanghaied, but my animals have been kidnapped. I know time is of the essence."

Warrick tried to suppress a grin; O'Reilly didn't even try to hide his annoyance. Nick held out his hands in a calming gesture.

"Its all right, sir. Why don't you tell us what's missing."

The storeowner went into a long diatribe about his missing stock. Both criminalists scanned the owner's records. He had about thirty missing exotic fish and amphibians. After some brief calculations Warrick looked over at his partner and whistled. "Over ten thousands dollars for a bunch of lizards and goldfish."

Nick shook his head. "Well, they are not your run of you mill fish, Rick. Certain Japanese fighting fish are prized as a delicacy and are popular in underground circuits. Also many zoos have wait lists for some of the lizards that this guy had. It seems Mr. Landers uses this shop as a place of operations for private collectors. I bet his cliental is from all over the country."

Warrick's grin continued to widen after every word.

Nick looked him perplexed. "What?"

"Nothing man. So, Mr. Animal Planet, where would one go to sell these things? Is there an underground market?"

Nick laughed. "I have no clue, man. Discovery Channel doesn't cover the seedy shades of animalnapping."

Detective O'Reilly came over with his usual happy disposition. "You guys all right here? I just got a call for multiple homicide on Butler Street."

Nick's curiosity was piqued but he wasn't about to ask any questions. "We're fine here."

The older man turned to leave, but Warrick followed his retreating form. "When's the next officer on the scene?"

O'Reilly looked at the taller criminalist somewhat confused at the question. His gaze drifted over at the older owner who was talking rapidly on his cell phone, then over to Nick Stokes who was patiently waiting on his partner. Realization dawned on him.

"Um, well its not procedure on robbery cases, Warrick. But I'll get someone over here right away." The heavyset detective eyed the criminalist, any comments he had were kept to himself.

"Good." Warrick was all business. "Then would you mind taking the owner outside while we're going over our scene?"

The detective raised his eyebrows at that request. It was obvious the CSI wasn't taking any chances of late. "Will do," he said gruffly.

O'Reilly went over to escort the owner outside despite his protests of being ejected from his own business. Warrick wandered back in to divide up the scene.

Nick had his hands on his hips, and gave the other CSI a pointed expression. "This is a pet store, bro. I don't think our suspect is going to come and hit it again."

Warrick matched his partner's expression with a serious look. "I'm just following protocol. People have been lax of late."

Nick just smiled and shook his head. He stepped closer as he kept his voice low. "Lax? Warrick, I've never seen so many cops hover around scenes like the ones you and I have worked the past week. There is no threat level here, cut O'Reilly some slack. I'm sure his next scene is a bit more vital then this one."

Warrick's eyes were bright with intensity. "O'Reilly stays till the next officer is sent here." He said in a deeper voice.

Nick chewed on his bottom lip. "Fine, man." He said a bit testily.

The Texan pulled out some latex gloves in slipped them on each hand and canvassed the store with his eyes.

Warrick seemed to relax a bit. "Which area do you want?"

The other criminalist seemed to consider his options. "I really don't dig amphibians. I'll go check out the fish."

"Figures. I'll get the safe and head over to the lizard area next."

Both CSIs grabbed their kits and headed into opposite sections of the store. Warrick walked behind the counter and squatted down near the safe. He still couldn't understand how people could pay so much for animals, but then again he'd seen people spend a ton more loot on other senseless things. He gathered up his supplies and set to work. He knew O'Reilly had all ready gotten a list of people from the owner who knew the combination to the safe.

Nick marveled at the amount of fish tanks in the store. Each aquarium contained every kind of fish imaginable. Every color and size was represented and Nick caught himself studying them in awe. The criminalist shook his head; he had to visit this place when he had more time. He carried his kit to the backroom, where the more prized and expensive fish were kept.

The room was small, and very low lit. Each tank hummed from filtering the water. Nick glanced at his inventory list and went over to the far end to scan the ones with the missing fighting fish. These tanks were huge, over forty gallons in size. Each aquarium sat on a very large stand. Nick began dusting the tops of the lid since the suspect would have touched them in order to snag the fish. Nick took his time lifting every sample and started to move down in front of the tank.

He found dozens of prints on the front of the glass. It would take forever to gather the numerous sets as well as analyzing them back at the lab. Nick maneuvered over to the next tank and studied the now empty waters. He shook his head ruefully at the absurdity of this particular crime. He heard the noise of the tank behind him and glanced at the row there. The CSI wondered how much the owner's water bill was for this facility.

"No way this replaces the ocean," he said under his breath.

He saw some of the prettiest orange striped specimens swimming around in the unit behind him. Nick smiled, he have to really do some research of aquatic life when he was done.

Nick shifted down the wall of glass as he searched for the next tank that had been robbed. Each unit was numbered and he would double check with the master sheet in his hands. He went down to one of the tanks that made up the corner of the room. Just like the other one, the CSI started with the lid and worked his way down to dust the front part of the tank.

The unit he was working on must have been a popular one from the amount of prints he was gathering. He thought maybe the owner would be more meticulous about keeping the aquarium spotless. Mr. Landers didn't know much about Windex cleaner. Nick stayed in the caddy corner of the building for a while as he went to his knees to powder the bottom part of the large aquarium.

The criminalist heard the loud bubbling of the tank behind him; the filter system seemed to be working over time in that unit. However, what was more distracting, was the unit to his very right. The light bulb was excessively bright. The units that surrounded him housed an array of tropical fish. The temperature of each tank was set higher and the lights were brighter.

The CSI wondered how higher sets of light ever truly represented the sun, it wasn't like the rays reached that far down in the ocean. The quiet was kind of nice; this little storehouse was an interesting room. Nick tried not to look directly at the light from the tank to the right of him, but its illuminations were distracting. Nick stayed crouched down, his intense focus on the front glass structure.

Nick's mind began to wonder a bit, his peripheral vision kept grabbing his attention. The glow of the bulbs were right at eye level and his fingers began to tremble slightly.

"What the Hell?" He mumbled to himself as he stared dumbly at his fingers.

Nick looked up and stared at the inch thick glass in front of him. The hallway of tanks were like a solid wall of glass in front and behind him. He backed up, but his shoulders hit the tank.

The air seemed to thin out. The room wavered, and started to close in on him. His breath hitched in his throat, a few droplets of sweat dotted his brow.

'No. I'm not going to freak out now. Calming breaths. Deep calming breaths.'

Nick stood up quickly. He placed a latex covered hand on top of one of the tanks exhaled heavily. He looked around franticly trying to replace the images of Plexiglas with the calming realism of peaceful fish. Nick let his hand slide down to the front of the tank. He could feel the cool exterior of the glass.

They say all five senses are equally important. Nick could see all the glass around him. Hear the stillness of the room punctuated by the low humming. The noise was like the eerie sound of several fans. Feeling the glass beneath gloved fingertips was just too much.

Nick hurried as fast as his feet could take him out of that room. He nearly ripped the door off its hinges when he threw it open and bolted out. He hurried into the store and made a beeline for the outside. He brushed past the officer assigned to the scene who eyed him wearily as Nick hurried into the parking lot.

Nick placed his hands on his knees, as he calmed his breathing. It wasn't near the panic levels of weeks ago, but it was certainly some kind of anxiety attack. His throat had not closed in on him, but it was like he couldn't take being in that enclosed space.

Nick slowly began to calm down. He was embarrassed by his slip up. He tried to refocus his attention on his job. Nick squared his shoulders as he gathered his thoughts. He turned around and headed back into the store.

When he reached the doorway he was met by his partner. Warrick had the same worried expression that he had sported for almost the first month after the incident. Nick had hoped he'd never see that look again.

Officer Tanner was standing alert only a few feet away. Nick knew his cheeks were burning; he really wasn't up to any kind of scrutiny. "Just needed some fresh air," he explained. The excuse sounded lousy to his ears.

Warrick didn't even pretend to buy into his lame explanation. The other CSI hesitated briefly, choosing his words wisely. "You all right?" It was a genuine question.

Nick was all ready nodding his head in a positive manner. "Yeah." He laughed softly and shrugged. "Nothing I can't handle." Nick cleared his throat. "I'll get back there and finish."

The criminalist tried to walk back in, but Warrick had not budged from the entrance. Nick's nonchalant mannerisms started to ebb away to a more frustrated posture.

"Warrick, I'm fine."

The taller CSI narrowed his eyes. "You put a dent in the wall from where the door handle impacted." Warrick's expression softened. "I checked it out...the room is...very small. I should have taken it, I'm sorry."

Nick frowned. "Don't apologize to me, man. I'm capable of canvassing that room. I just let my thoughts drift. Won't happen again."

Nick was getting overly agitated, but he didn't want this to escalate into some kind of set back. He could imagine the report that Grissom and Catherine would read and interpret from this. "I have three more tanks to process."

"No, I'll complete it. Why don't you examine the rest of the cages in the amphibian area."

Nick took exception to the commanding tone of his partner. "Warrick, I don't take orders from you. We're of equal rank."

"You have any of your meds with you?" Warrick asked.

Nick looked over at the officer whose ears perked up at that last question. A bit angry, Nick grabbed Warrick's shoulder and led him further in the parking lot. In a low voice covered by a thick accent Nick whispered. "I'm not on any more medication. And no, I don't carry any with me."

Warrick shook loose of his partner's grip. "Nick, you're not ready to go back in that room. If you don't have anything to combat a panic attack, then I'm taking over. No arguing about it." Warrick explained.

"It wasn't a panic attack!" Nick stormed away for a second as he tried to reign in his temper. He turned on his heel and stared at his partner. "I felt closed in. I came out here to clear my head. End of story."

It appeared that Warrick was going to continue the argument, but Nick wasn't going to let him. "I have to fight my own battles. You can't do it for me all the time."

Without any further comment on the discussion Nick stalked past his partner and went back into the store. He could hear Warrick follow him. Nick cast a look behind his shoulder and continued into the back room. He found his spot again and sighed deeply. He picked up his brush and started dusting the next area.

Nick remained in the room for the next hour. He fought back the suffocating feeling that gripped him a few more times. He regretted his hostile tone towards his friend. It seemed like his coworkers were antsier then he was at work. Their combined concern was causing more pressure for him to act as normally as possible. Nick knew he might encounter a few setbacks, he wasn't stupid. The overbearing behavior of his colleagues however, only served to make him even more unsure of himself.

His task completed, Nick gathered his collections and put them away with the rest of his kit. He found his partner speaking to the officer. He didn't hear any of their conversation, which made him even more paranoid when they stopped talking to each other once his presence was noticed.

Nick nodded towards both men. "Ready to roll?"

"Yeah." Warrick answered quietly.

Both partners drove back to the lab in an uneasy silence. The topic of what transpired at the pet store was never brought up. Nick wanted to know what his partner was going to type up in his report. However, he really didn't feel like getting into another argument. The tension in the SUV was unsettling so Nick turned on the radio. Neither man spoke as they got out of the car and both entered CSI to work on their case.

tbc...

* * *

Kristen's notes:

Wow, hope I was able to contiune the build up guys after the last chapter. Hope you enjoyed it!

Shacky's: notes:

Higherbeingfriendsfan- I am such a Greg fan, I am really trying to portray him as a more grown up man than the usual goof most people do, and a true friend who can empathize and help him, and Nick has a way to go still. Thank you for your reviews.

Designation- What can I say, your reviews have been ones that I always look forward to. Thank you for them, they really do mean so much. This was one of my favorite chapters to write, this and the slumber party chapter. I love writing Nick and Greg so, I really wanted to try to show Nick trying to get better, but maybe not as much as he wants. Again, thank you for your time and reviews.

Jewelbaby- I'm a slasher at heart, so I love writing the Nick and Greg friendship stuff. I believe they are true friends no matter what, that is canon. I try to let that friendship come through, plus I truly believe Greg can empathize with him because of the explosion and being the one treated with kid gloves. I have had a great time writing these Nick/Greg scenes and thank you so much for your consistent reviews, they really mean so much to me and Kristen.

Everybetty- Wow, new favorite chapter, that truly is special to me. I have written very little actually, and only Nick/Greg slash, so I jumped at the chance when Kristen asked me to write this story with her, it has truly been a wonderful learning experience, plus I have really become a better writer because of this. And I truly believe we have put together a great post GD fic and to get the feedback we have makes it that much more to us. Thank you.

New Creation- Professional? Wow, now that means a lot. I am a Nick/Greg slasher at heart, but I do believe their friendship is canon, and a good one. They have such great chemistry on screen and always seem to have a good time, so I can see Greg trying to comfort Nick, but also keep it between them, catching things that others may miss, and letting Nick know it's OK, little things happen sometime. And since Greg had the explosion, I think he has an understanding no one else does. Plus I just love those two guys, and try to let that come through. But thank you, that means so much, cause I really haven't written much, but have learned so much writing this with Kristen, is has been an honor and an experience I will cherish.

Cheelalaucha- Glad you liked the bubble gum thing. It can be like that. You can be fine, and the smallest little thing can take you right back to a moment in time, I really wanted to catch everyone off guard, while they were all having a good time, and then WHAM, but Greg is there once again, understanding and helping. I love that friendship and take so much from it when I write those scenes. Thank you.

LemonGrass- Nice to see we are still picking up new readers. So happy to see you are enjoying this story. We worked on is for almost two months before we posted it, blood sweat and tears literally, but what an experience. I have truly loved it and learned so much, and the great reviews are truly icing on the cake for me.

Amy- Like I have said, I am such a Greg fan, and a Nick/Greg fan, I can so see him being a true support system for Nick. You're very perceptive, yeah Nick is trying, but not quite there. Thank you so much for your reviews.

Anmani- I saved yours for last, it truly brought tears to my eyes, seriously. Like I said earlier, I haven't written that much, I am a little old Nick/Greg slasher, just started dabbing in fanfiction earlier this year, and by some miracle, Kristen asked me to write with her. I couldn't believe it because I loved her work since "A Walk in the Woods" then got to emailing each other, and viola, she asked me to write this. We worked for two months, and I was scared at first, feeling I wasn't up to her caliber of writing, I still don't think I am but have learned so much from writing this with her, and about myself, that I can do it. I love the Nick/Greg relationship, and try to bring it out during this fic by Greg's understanding and support, and also his Gregness to help set Nick at ease. I was truly touched by your review, and to say this is the best piece of fanfiction you have ever read, let's just say I am going to print this off and tape it to my computer when I think I can't write anymore, Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Tenofswords- So glad you are enjoying this, I love Greg and I am a slasher at heart, so writing the Nick/Greg scenes are my favorites, but Kristen writes the best angst. Together we make a pretty good team I think. I this is my first venture at a 'novel' length fic, but it is truly thanks to her. So happy you have enjoyed this so far, but we have a ways to go still.

KASEY(KC javascript:ol('http/ Yeah, I thought Nick may begin to feel a little awkward being surrounded by all that glass, and all the new people staring at him like some side show, the "guy that was buried" when he just wants his life back. Yeah, I really tried to have that panic attack sneak up on him, that's how they work, and I really wanted to surprise the readers with it. And during Nick's eight week absence, we put the team back together again, Kristen and I fixed that problem, so swing was back at nights again.

Groban- Another "one of my favorite chapter" reviews, WOW, that really means so much to me, it truly does. I know I not nearly as well known in CSI fic as Kristen, barely at all, and to start out with something like this has really been a privilege. So glad our interpretation of Nick's and the team's experience is working for everyone.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10 By Shacky**

* * *

It had been five nights since the incident at the pet store, and Nick could still feel some oddness between him and Warrick. One of them was having difficulties letting go, and it wasn't him. He spent his day off at home. Alone. No visits for once and he had all day to lounge around and watch baseball. However, the serenity of that quickly wore away, when his next four nights on shift were spent on an endless amount of B and E's. Then there was the missing person...who wasn't.

The "missing" wife thought shed 'get away' for a few days without bothering to tell anyone. It was almost laughable by now, but he was slowly getting more and more agitated each night. His coworkers still acted a bit off around him. He was always treated with over politeness or painful awkwardness. Hell, even some of the cops assigned to his scenes acted overly nervous around him.

Worst of all was the increased tension between him and Warrick. He felt like he had some invisible collar strung around his neck, with his partner straining to keep him within arm's reach. Nick didn't know how to feel. He loved Warrick like a brother, but the man was almost like some nervous father, the term over protectiveness didn't even begin to describe what it was like working with him. Nick missed their banter, small chitchat between shifts, locker room talk, discussing women and their escapades. Now it was just concern and worry. It was driving him crazy and no one seemed to notice. Nick felt like stopping in the middle of the lab and scream at everyone to go check in their issues at the desk.

He wanted to work. He wanted to do his job, but no on else seemed to think he was capable yet.

Warrick was his constant companion. Nick couldn't help but wonder what or if Warrick said something to their supervisor's about his small panic attack. It really was no big deal to him. Actually he thought he handled it pretty well compared to the vomiting in the diner the previous time he experienced one. He knew Greg understood what it was like to have everyone watch your every move, waiting for you to fall. That was what he felt like Warrick was doing, waiting for him to fall. But he wasn't, going to. Not now, not after all this time and work.

He had tried to sneak a peek at Warrick's report to Gris before it was sent off. The last thing he wanted was to have his supervisors and team members start second guessing him because of a few damn fish tanks. He got through it just fine he thought. He recovered quick and finished his job. Why couldn't Warrick see it that way?

He had a moment the following week, where he thought it was going to change. They all scrambled to the scene. Two DBs. It looked like a husband and wife, at a very large and upper class estate in one of the better parts of Las Vegas. All hands on deck for this one. Finally, he would be back on a murder case, after almost two and half months.

The team had all gathered when he and Warrick showed up. Grissom barked out orders to his team. Some things never changed.

"Here's what we've got. Female and male DB's were found by the groundskeeper this afternoon. I've already been here for a while and got the walk through done. Both DB's had their throats slit, and were shot at close range. This is a big one guys, keep it quiet." Grissom instructed his team.

"David all ready released the bodies. We're scouting this as the primary crime scene. They were both killed outside, back in their garden area near the side of the house. It seems to be a very important spot for some reason. The garden is quite elaborate. So we'll focus on there to see if we can't find out why."

Catherine chimed in with the rest of the details that they had noticed on their earlier walkthrough. "The garden will be our main focus, this murderer was sending a message with it somehow. The wife was found in a wheel barrel in the garden area, but she was covered in her award winning Daffodils. Husband was found a few feet away near the wooden stakes holding up his tomato plants. This might be a personal vendetta against the couple."

"I've seen this house in Better Homes and Gardens." Sara chimed in.

Catherine nodded. "This couple has won numerous awards for their garden. This all seems too personal to leave them out here with their prizes otherwise. We are ruling out robbery as a motive or a random break in. Nothing was taken, no jewels, no artwork, or anything of value. This feels like revenge or a crime of passion."

"We are also assuming they this garden was a project that they themselves worked on diligently, something personal to them, or they wouldn't have been killed and lain out here. So guys, let get at it." Catherine looked back at Gil to hand out assignments.

Grissom scanned his eager Team.

"Sara, I want you working the perimeter of the garden. I want anything that looks out of the ordinary. This was a very carefully kept garden. I want any broken flowers or plants noted. Get footprints plastered and matched against all the groundskeeper or anyone else that had any reason to be here. This place was immaculately kept; nothing should be out of place. If something is, I want it noted."

"Got it." Sara picked up her case and started around the front gate. She put her gloves on and started her search for anything out of place.

"Warrick. Catherine and I want you to work the overall sketch of the scene. I want everything detailed and marked. Like I said nothing here should be out of place, so if it is, note it. Any rock, cigarette butt, lay out everything for us Warrick."

"I'm on it." Warrick went off to his delegated assignment as well, leaving Nick and Greg waiting for their turns. Catherine followed him.

"Cath and I are each going to take a body. I will take the husband, and Catherine is going to process the wife. I need a different kind of help from you two."

"Uh Gris, where does that leave me and Greg?" Nick questioned his boss. His discontent at the situation was apparent. He had the sneaking suspicion he was being delegated to rookie work.

"I want you two to go back to the Lab and hit the computers. We have absolutely no motives for these murders. I want you guys to check through phone, credit, and computers records. Also look for any expense accounts of gardening centers. Focus on any gardening or flower awards, contests they might have been entered in and won recently. Look who came in second, and maybe cross check how many of the same people were in the same flower shows. Look for anything that doesn't look right."

"You want us checking out flower shows? This is the biggest case in months and I'm on desk duty?" Nick didn't hide how upset he felt. It was his first murder since he got back and he was supposed to be at the Lab and search the computer and phone records.

"Yes, Nick, we need a connection to anything with this garden and these flowers. Maybe a rival got too upset from their constant winning. There might be a tie to some fellow competitors." Grissom explained. He wasn't in the mood to be second-guessed by one of his CSI's.

"Well, I'm going to go wait in the truck for you Nick. We'll get right on it, Grissom." Greg knew words might be exchanged between the two and he thought it would be best to just get out of the way. The last place he wanted to be was in the middle of a shouting match.

"Why am I not working the scene, Gris? You all have been handing me softballs since I got back. If I couldn't handle it. I wouldn't be here. I want to work this scene, Grissom." Nick didn't notice his voice rising or the incredulous stare of his supervisor.

He continued on, the anger he had been feeling bleeding into his tone. "Damnit! I've done my Lab time. And don't think I haven't noticed Warrick glued to my side ever since I got back doing ever B and E in the greater Las Vegas area. When are you guys gonna let me work a scene like a CSI?" He couldn't keep the bitterness from his voice.

"Nick, working the computers and on the motive is just as important as processing the scene. Without motive we don't have a case and you know that. Plus, I am your supervisor and do not owe you any explanations as to your assignment." Grissom stated his reasons, even if the didn't admit all of them to himself.

"No, what I know is that I have been at back for work for almost a month. I've only been in the field with Warrick, handling cases that a Level One would oversee."

Nick fixed his boss with a serious look, the stress he had been feeling pinching his features as he unloaded. "You guys are so scared to let me do any real work. That's your problem, not mine. I am willing to take that chance Gris, it's my job. " Nick had raised his voice loud enough to attract the attention of the other CSIs.

Nick stood there staring astounded at his supervisor. Maybe Warrick had told Grissom about the pet store incident. He couldn't understand any other reason why Gris wouldn't want him working the actual scene. "Don't you trust me either? Are you waiting for me to freak out also? Or are you waiting for me to fail also so you can keep me safe in the Lab?"

"Nick, you don't get it." Grissom said somewhat exasperated. "This is a garden, a fairly large one."

Nick just stared at his supervisor with a look of utter confusion. It was almost priceless.

Grissom exhaled slowly, then he spoke in a much quieter voice. "Who knows what kind of insects inhabit such a spacious botanical area. In fact, I have a pretty good idea. Pesticides or not. I just can't take the risk of you being in there." Grissom's voice was almost defeated in nature. This admittance almost too much.

"I can't yet. It's too soon for me Nicky, I can't take that risk with you." Grissom seemed almost fragile now. It was an obvious effort to let the other man know his reluctance.

Nick swallowed he was touched by the concern. He would have killed for such attention years ago from his mentor. But right now, it was the last thing he wanted.

"You aren't taking the risk. I'm trying to do my job, and you all are holding me back. Not for me, but for your benefit. I'm not...I'm not trapped underground anymore." Nick's last words were forced.

"I'm right here. That's also why I carry this just in case." Nick pulled out his now constant friend, his epi-pen . "I don't have the problem anymore," Nick cast a glare at his coworkers who were trying their best to work on the scene. "You all do."

With that, Nick stormed his way back to the truck attracting the attention of everyone at the scene. He hated seeing all his coworkers stare at him.

"Enough people, back to work." Grissom shouted to the rest of his team letting them know the show was over and the decision was his take make. He went over and started processing the body of the husband.

* * *

Greg was already sitting in the truck having heard most of the conversation between Nick and Grissom. How could he not? Unlike Nick's usual partner though, Greg was sitting in the passenger seat holding out the keys to his friend, who eagerly grabbed them. Nick started the truck and headed back towards the Lab.

Nick gripped the steering wheel so hard on the way back his knuckles were white His jaw was clenched so tight that the cords around his neck stood out. Greg thought it had to be painful to be that tense. Not a word was spoken between the two on the short drive back to the Lab. They both hopped out and shut their doors. Greg noticed Nick shut his with a little more force than necessary.

Their first words weren't spoken until they were settled into the evidence room pouring over computer printouts and phone records. Pictures of prize Daffodils taken at the last three recent flower shows the couple competed in were spread all over the table.

"Look Nick, I know this isn't where you want to be, stuck here in the Lab with the rookie looking over phone records. But at least it's a murder case again. This is the first homicide you've got to be back on since your return. And I know it's not where you want to be, but it's a start." Greg was once again trying to be the optimistic one, showing Nick the positive side of the situation.

"G, it isn't that at all. I can do my job. They won't let me. They don't think I'm ready." Nick got out of his chair and started pacing.

"They aren't ready to let go of me. Let my out of their sight. They can't take the chance that something might happen to me again."

Nick was obviously frustrated at his situation but who knew Greg could do nothing about it.

"Nick, remember what I told you that day at the Lake? I don't think you get it." Greg's voice got lower. "We thought we were watching you die. We couldn't help you... we watched you scream and in pain." Greg swallowed. "All we could do was...was grasp at straws."

Greg couldn't help the tremble in his voice at the horrible memories. "We care about you man, and we came so close to loosing you. Give us a little space and time. This wasn't just about you. I'm not saying you didn't suffer the most or take the most torture, but what we saw...all.. of it. I don't know if no one else will ever fully forget that."

"I'm sorry G, but I need to get back to my life, before that night. I want to be the same person you all saw me as before. I feel like no one wants me to be that person again. I have to be or I can't continue working here like this." Nick felt defeated in his admission.

"Nick, they will, we all will. But give us some time too. You're part of our family, even Grissom's. Even though he won't say it, he was scared too. Now let's do our job and show them all that we make the best team this crime lab has ever seen. I'll go get some fresh coffee while you get these papers in order." Greg hoped he was breaking through some of Nick's anger at his teammates. He wanted to show him they did mean well. They just didn't know how to express it.

"Yeah, ok man, ok. I'm sorry, I uh, didn't mean to unload on you. You are the one person who still treats me normally." Nick said sheepishly, almost embarrassed.

"Well, that what friends are for Nick, like I said, give them a little time. It was hell on them too. So, how bout some coffee and let's get at this mess of printouts?"

"Sounds good to me man, I'll be here waiting for you." Nick watched the newest CSI walk out the door. He thught about what he said, about what they all must have seen and went through that night. He knew it was difficult, but he had a life to get back to. Right now it started with this paperwork in front of him, and he would prove to them all he was still the same old Nick.

tbc..

* * *

Kristen's thanks:

anmani:

Thanks. I love Nick's fascination with animals, its so endearing, but as you said, its represents another unexpected trigger. Warrick has things to work out, we'll see as times go by what will happen from it. Thank you, I really think Warrick would be over protective about almost everything.

Ponchlives:

Nick needs a support system, but when those people are also in need of help, then everyone is going to have issues. You're right Nick needs his friends, but their constant hovering is only going to add stress to an all ready volatile and complicated situation.

new creation:

Wow, thank you. I hope the show does deal with some of these things, I want my focus still be crimes, but some continuity of Nicks' recovery needs to be in the background. It was too big not to be.

Designation:

Warrick's refusal to give up the keys are just small things he feels he has control of. Not even playing a simple game of chance speaks many volumes of all the crazy things in his head.

Bebob-

Thank you, glad you are liking what Shacky and I have written.

Katnits:

You hit the nail on the head, however, we will have to wait and see if the team will begin to get it together, because you are right, they are only to cause more problems then help Nick.

Groban.

tension. Its about tension between all of them!

Lemon grass-

Nice to see you back. I really liked writing the pet store scene. before the "incident": Nick would be so enamored being there. His true love of for nature and animals. Yep, Nick wants to face his demons and learn to work them out, brother Warrick means well, but...

CSIxMiss-

Shacky and I thank you for such nice praise. Glad you are enjoying this story.

Higherbeingfriendfan-

Thanks. The panic attack in the aquarium area was a challenge to write, I'm glad it came out emotional and real. That means a lot.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11 By Kristen**

* * *

Nick stifled a lazy yawn as he searched for another cup of coffee. He had started going back to the gym on a regular bases again. He was still in very good shape; he had only lost a little muscle tone over the past few months. However, it was going to take him time to get used to the running, swimming, and weight training he had been accustomed to in the past. Nick didn't perform at any of his peak times or anything, but it felt good to feel the endorphin high of a good work out. His doctor had agreed it was a good outlet for some restlessness and it might serve to let him sleep deeper at night.

He wasn't plagued by the countless nightmares like when he got back to the hospital; however, his sleep was interrupted at least a couple times a week by bad dreams. Nick still avoided his medications at all cost, except for a rare time or two. Strenuous workouts had certainly alleviated some of this the past few days.

Nick rounded a corner to find Warrick and Catherine in the hallway. He wasn't in a bad mood, which had been a bit more common with him of late.

Catherine begun to be a bit more relaxed around him more. Their conversations were more casual and normal.

"Hey, Nick." His boss greeted.

"Hey Cath," he replied in his usual friendly tone. He looked over at Warrick and gave him his head nod hello.

"What's goin' on?" Warrick asked, something he said when he never expected an answer.

Nick grinned a little. He and his partner often asked each other what was going on as their hello to each other. The criminalist looked up expectantly, his partner was a bit tense, which wasn't unusual for him of late. That basketball court to exorcise both their demons was looking better every day Nick thought.

"You and Warrick got a 419 at a liquor store. Vega is heading to the scene as we speak." Catherine said in an easygoing manner. She looked at Nick almost as if studying his reaction.

Nick's grin widened. He wasn't about to make a smart-ass remark. It was about time he got to work on a homicide. He stole a glance at the lanky CSI who stood rigidly next their supervisor. Nick ignored the tension. Not even his over protective partner could ruin this moment.

"Great." Nick looked over at Warrick. "I'm driving." Nick even winked at him.

"Picture that." Warrick responded.

Nick couldn't help but smile further. That was almost the "old Warrick", competitive about any aspect of the case, including who got behind the wheel.

"I'll meet you in the parking lot, bro." Nick beamed as he tapped Warrick's shoulder good-naturedly.

"Meet ya, there." The other criminalist shouted after Nick's retreating form.

Warrick gave his superior an uneasy expression as he sighed loudly.

Catherine Willows was not going to have any attitude thrown her way right now. She put a hand on Warrick's arm and stared at him intently. "Nick's a grown man. You're going to have to let this go eventually."

Catherine always used the word "it" or "incident" around the other CSI. She didn't back down even as her coworker scowled at her. "I know that," Warrick acknowledged gruffly. "He may act like he's moving on, and everyone in this damn lab might try to pretend that things are back to normal."

Warrick cleared his throat as someone walked by, but his intense gaze never faltered. "However out there...out in the real world, danger is around every corner. And I'll be damned if we all just forget what can happen."

Catherine shook head. "Bad things occur, Warrick. You can't stop them all and you can't be responsible for everything that goes on around you." She closed the distance between the both of them, her face peering up at him. "You got to let go of the guilt, or you might as well leave part of yourself back in that hole in the ground."

Conrad Ecklie started down the hallway and Catherine turned her attention towards him, thus halting their conversation. She walked away casting her colleague a concerned look.

"I all ready did." Warrick muttered to himself as he went to catch up with the subject of their conversation.

* * *

Both criminalists walked from the truck over to the local liquor store. The shop was located in run down part of town, on a corner street, with poor lighting. Both CSIs took in the surroundings knowing that sketchy locations in bad neighbors were often a bad mix. Detective Vega was standing outside with one other officer. He nodded to both men as they approached.

"Nick. Warrick."

"Vega." Nick answered.

Warrick nodded.

"Store closed less than half an hour ago. 911 call reported shots fired and an officer investigated ten minutes later. DB is behind the counter, shot point blank, single tap to the head. Money drawer's empty." Vega explained the situation in his usual, concise manner.

"Surveillance?" Warrick asked.

"Still checking the tapes." The detective answered.

"No witnesses? No one saw nothing or heard nothing?" Nick ventured to ask. He knew the crimes in situations like these, left very little to go on.

"Nothing, but our dead guy." The Latino replied. "The clerk might have shot the suspect. There's a weapon near the body, and some blood in front of the counter."

"Find any shells?' Warrick asked, studying the outside of the store.

"Haven't been here long enough." The detective shrugged.

Warrick looked over at the door, with bars along the inside window. It was ajar, he stepped closer, it hadn't been busted open. So the robbery might have occurred while the business was still operating.

The CSI looked around trying to spot any suspicious people. A cabbie was parked across the street. The driver and another person were talking between each other. A couple of wanna-be gang bangers were smoking cigarettes across the street. They would cast their looks over their direction every once in a while. "No eye witnesses, yeah I buy that." He said sarcastically.

Vega looked over. "I all ready spoke to them. They gave me the usual silent treatment. Took down their info."

Warrick didn't hide his surprise. He scanned over to the right at one of the other closed businesses, a check-cashing joint. A man in a ratty windbreaker and scruffy curly hair was eyeing them with interest. He leaned against the building and quickly looked away.

"You ready to go in?" Nick asked, interrupting Warrick's thoughts.

"Yeah." He answered and both CSIs began their investigation.

The shop was a typical cramped set up. Enough room for the booze, a small counter, and not enough room to occupy that many people. Nick stopped short after only a few steps. He shined his light on a drop of blood and put one of his markers down as he snapped a photo. He scanned the area looking for a shell casing.

Warrick walked past him and peered over at the counter and let out a low whistle. The body was slumped down, but the blood spray peppered the back counter. Blood stained the area and splatter was all over some of the bottles of liquor stored on shelves above.

"Man, this was very close range." Warrick shined his flashlight over the DB, brain matter particles were all over the front of the counter. The whole scene was a complete mess.

Nick followed some of the blood drops further in the squat building. "Yeah, well he might have gotten a shot off." Nick had all ready placed three markers down and canvassed the floor for any sighs of a bullet. "The slug might still be in out perp. We'll need to check all the local ERs for victims."

"Keep searching. Might be embedded in a wall, or shelf." Warrick mumbled, as the he went to the back counter. "Man, this is going to take all night. I hope the coroner isn't too tied up".

Warrick began taking photos of the body, detailing every angle of the DB. Then he started taking shots over the surrounding bloody stock behind the dead clerk.

"Yeah, the bullet could be anywhere. " Nick observed, as he continued to document the blood drops. He walked further to the back of the store. His camera flashing in the tiny shop. He squatted down to take another photo and headed towards the back door.

The front one opened and David the assistant coroner, arrived to go over and then release the body for investigation.

He wandered behind the register area, his eyebrows arching. "Not the prettiest site of the night."

Warrick moved out of the way, while the man went to work. The criminalist looked over at the interior of the store and noticed Nick's markers, their pattern leading away. He tightened his jaw muscles as he continued to look for his partner.

"Body has only been dead less than an hour." David called over his shoulder with his findings.

"Yeah, I know." Warrick answered somewhat distractedly. He started following Nick's trail with his eyes, as it led toward and out the exit door.

"The body's all yours. Just sign the needed paper work, " David went on a few feet away.

Warrick tried to keep himself in check. There was no need for this damn irrational worry. Maybe Catherine was right. He needed to loosen up a bit, allow Nick to regain some self-confidence. And he needed to get a handle on his nerves. Warrick licked his lips. He could hear some lecture from his therapist echoing in his head.

"Yeah, yeah." He answered David, heading back to the body.

* * *

Nick had inched his way into the alley. He got into a flow of snapping shots, dropping his marker, and tracking the small trail of blood. He scanned the narrow area for anything out of the ordinary. He wasn't going to take his surroundings to chance anymore. The path was quiet and still. He flashed his light over the asphalt trying to locate any more blood. The splotches of were getting further apart and the drops smaller.

Nick wiped his forehead with his arm, careful not to knock off his hat. He took a deep breath and headed towards a dumpster as he followed his trail. He noticed that the blood stopped near the trash receptacle. He studied the area, trying to determine if the suspect might have tended to his wound. Nick looked for anything that could be used to stop possible bleeding.

He rummaged around, his flashlight illuminating wherever he directed it. "Where did you go?" He wondered out loud.

Nick heard a noise and saw a man hidden in the shadows several feet away from him. Instantly alert, Nick straightened to his full height, his hand near his holstered weapon.

"Hey." Nick stepped closer to the figure. "Come over here." He ordered.

The person held his hands up in front of him, and nervously inched closer to the CSI.

"I'm s-sorry, sir. I-I'm not here to cause trouble." A quivering voice spoke.

Nick shined his flashlight at the approaching man, taking in his old blue windbreaker. The guy blinked several times by the brightness of the beam. Nick noticed his unkempt shaggy beard and hair. Nick studied that man, he had two mismatched shoes, and ratty old jeans.

The stranger was shaking slightly, obviously from nerves, but Nick didn't know what he was so skittish about.

The man pointed at Nick's vest. "You, a cop?"

Nick wandered closer to the possible witness. "I'm a criminalist for the Las Vegas Crime Lab. What's your name?"

"I'm Sam. Sam Williams, officer."

Nick didn't feel the need to correct him. "What are you doing over here? This is a sealed off area."

"I-I live around here," the man responded shakily. He was starting to stare past Nick, his eyes darting around the alleyway.

Nick didn't feel that the homeless guy was a threat, but his mannerisms were making him a bit anxious. "You got some ID?"

The shifty guy started backing away. Nick kept his right hand near his weapon as he carefully took small steps to keep the distance between them equal. "Sir, do you have any identification?"

It was obvious that the nervous man wasn't going to stand around for questioning. Nick grabbed his radio with his left hand to request assistance, when the motion set the guy running away.

"Hey, wait!" Nick shouted after him. He pressed the button on his two way. "Detective Vega, do you read?" Nick had all ready adjusted the frequency so his request wouldn't go blaring to every cop in the city.

"I read ya, Stokes. What's up?"

Nick wasn't going to pursue the guy. "I just caught a homeless guy back behind the store near the dumpster. He ran off before I had a chance to get any ID. He might be a possible witness or suspect."

"What's his description?"

Nick gave the detective all the needed info as well what direction the man ran off to.

"I'm calling for back up, Nick. Officer Reynolds and I, think we spotted your guy. I'll keep you informed."

Nick stood in the small alleyway trying to take in that last few moments. He felt a light sweat break out around his forehead, but otherwise he felt fine. He contemplated his next move when the exit door burst open. Nick spun on his heel, his hand gripping the butt of his gun.

"Nick! You all right?" A panicked Warrick shouted, as he jogged over to where the other criminalist was standing.

"Jesus, Rick!" Nick yelled, his heart pounding against his chest. "You scared the Hell out of me!" He complained a bit angrily

Warrick scanned the area, his heavy breathing loud in the still back alley. "I heard your request," as if that simple explanation answered for his weird behavior.

Nick narrowed his eyes; his partner had his radio tuned to pick up broadcasts by anyone near the scene. The criminalist shook his head. "Some homeless guy wandered over. I wanted to find out if he knew anything or saw maybe what happened. But he freaked out just after I requested some ID."

Warrick's eyes' drifted around taking in every inch of the alley. "Yeah. Guy have on a dark windbreaker?"

Nick furrowed his brow. "Yeah. Vega and Reynolds are searching for him." Nick's expression was curious. "How did you know?"

Warrick shrugged. "I noticed him when we arrived. He seemed a bit shady, but I didn't think nothing of it." Warrick blew out a breath. "I'll help you out here, till they get back."

Nick cocked his head. "Dude, last I checked, you got a body to process and I still have a trail to follow. Super Dave still here?"

"Yeah. He's almost ready to leave. " Warrick walked past his partner. "You check out the dumpster?"

Nick growled under his breath. "I was just about to." The criminalist stalked over to his last marker and picked up his camera. Then he stood toe to toe with the bigger CSI. "Go back in, Warrick. I got it out here."

Warrick Brown hadn't budged. The CSI's feet seemed glued to their spot and it was obvious that his mind was trying to rationalize his behavior.

Nick wasn't going to give his partner a chance to cop up an excuse. "Stop baby-sitting me, man." Nick's voice was low and even. Not exactly menacing, but his tone should have sent the message loud and clear.

Warrick seemed to take exception to the accusation. "Nick..."

His partner cut him off. "Go process the body and leave me to do my job." Nick's voice was thick, his accent heavy. He placed both hands on his hips and glared at his friend.

Warrick backed down and grudgingly left.

Nick walked over to the dumpster. He went to his haunches and searched for anything amiss. His frustration and guilt eating away at him. The CSI's concentration took a walk, and he stood up somewhat hot headed. Nick paced up and down the thrash bin, his blood pumping fiercely in his veins. He hated how he was feeling of late.

Paranoia. Fear. Anger.

He just wanted things to be like they were before that night.

That one fucking night.

Nick kicked the dumpster hard, moving the receptacle by several inches. He slammed his hand down on the side and tried to control himself.

Were things ever going to be the same, he wondered.

* * *

Warrick ignored David as he carried on about the body. He knew he should be paying attention. What a coroner had to say about the preliminary. However, his mind elsewhere, Warrick just stood mutely on.

The other man obviously sensed something was off and made a speedy exit with the body.

Warrick was going to make his way back to the counter when Vega entered the store.

The detective nodded at the criminalist. "Still haven't found that guy. I radioed to Stokes that Officer Reynolds is still canvassing the area."

Warrick grunted, slightly frustrated at the news.

"I'm going back out front to see if I can gather anymore statements."

Warrick watched the man leave, his thoughts still drifting back to the alley. If Vega was in the front of the store and the other officer was tracking down that homeless guy, then Nick was outside with no one watching his back.

His brain told him to stay put. Let his partner work the scene, fall back into their respective routines before the Hell of three months ago. Warrick gritted his teeth. That was the problem; things were never going to be the same. It didn't matter if Nick got pissed at him; he wasn't not going to take any more stupid chances.

Warrick practiced what he was going to say as he strolled over to the backdoor. Confrontations. He was never the best person at defusing situations; his sharp temper and mouth always seem to get his ass into hot water. He'd stand his ground this time.

Warrick pushed open the door walked a few steps outside. He let his eyes adjust in the dim light and saw his partner crouched down scouring the area under the thrash bin. He was defiantly on the hunt for something. Warrick didn't want to sneak up on him, but he noticed some movement from the corner of alley.

The homeless guy was approaching Nick from behind; the shady character was sticking close to the wall almost out of sight from all the shadows.

Warrick's mouth almost lost its ability to shout out a warning. He was all ready drawing his weapon and storming across the short distance to the where his partner was working unaware of the danger.

"Freeze! Put your hands up where I can see him!" Warrick shouted, spit flying out from the force and urgency of his voice.

Nick almost fell down, as he turned around so fast to see what was going on. His hand was pulling out his own weapon on the reaction to the words he just heard.

The homeless guy's arms were not up in the air like they should. His hands were in front of him, shaking so bad that it was hard to tell if he had anything at all in them.

"I said hands in the air!" Warrick ordered again, his finger itchy on the trigger. He glanced over at Nick, who seemed to be taking in the whole scene in shock.

"Get beside me Nick!" Warrick ordered through clenched teeth. He wanted his partner right there next to him. Not a few feet away, not so far away that he wasn't in control of the situation.

Nick's focus was on the scared as hell man, trembling a few away. Nick stepped towards the homeless guy. "Warrick, the guy's unarmed."

Warrick didn't know what to say. His Glock was pointed at the suspect... at the danger. Nick was certainly not going towards him like he requested. "Back away from him, Nick. Call it in on your radio."

Nick radioed the situation, but he was more worried about his partner then any possible threat. The criminalist saw the nervous man rooted to the ground. His eyes were like those of a deer in headlights. The guy's hands were empty; it still didn't cause his antsy partner to back down.

"Warrick, he's got no weapon. Put yours away." He ordered.

Warrick Brown was still trying to take in the entire thing when Detective Vega came bounding into the alley. He grabbed the suspect, turned him around, and cuffed the man before anyone else said a thing.

The "suspect" was now babbling away his apologies. Scared to death by all the commotion.

Nick walked over to him as Vega questioned him. The CSI stood and listened, as the poor man explained that his blanket and few possessions were hidden away by the dumpster. He was just trying to get them back. The man continued on for several more minutes, obviously frightened by the police. He had been scared that Nick was going to steal his things.

Nick glared at Warrick who listened intently to the story. There was no weapon, no real danger. He felt guilty, but regretted nothing. He looked over at his partner.

Nick knew Warrick well enough, that the man wasn't about to apologize. His mannerisms and facial expressions were an open book. That wasn't going to let him off the hook. No way. Nick's frazzled mind was too cranked up to deal with this...not yet.

Nick knew that Warrick got the message loud and clear. No words were needed, the air crackled with such tension, that even a single sound might cause one of them to lose their cool.

When both of them had the time to regain some composure things were going to go down. It was going to be tonight and it wasn't going to be pretty.

tbc...

* * *

Kristen's notes: I'm really amazed by all the great detailed discussion/feedback this story has generated. I'm glad that it causes everyone to want to leave such detailed comments and that you feel like taking the time to drop us a few thoughts. Its been amazing. thank you everyone. Hoped everyone enjoyed the tension in this one :-)

Shacky's notes:

Rozzy7- So glad you have enjoyed the story, I really enjoyed writing the Greg parts, trying to give Nick an outlet, someone who can maybe break through to him. Thanks for taking the time to review.

Poncholives- Kristen truly has done an excellent job writing Warrick because I believe his guilt goes deeper than anyone's, but in time hopefully he will see also. Thank you for your reviews, it's been great reading them.

Designation- I really see Warrick and Greg acting differently, not only different personalities, but I truly believe Greg has a better understanding because of the explosion, which I don't feel was dealt with enough on the show, he had to have suffered emotionally, even the ever fun and goofy Greg. Plus I think he understands Nick can feel normal around him, so I tried to write him that way.

Jewelbaby- Wow, so glad you like my stories, I have a whole bunch my at my LJ site, plus about six Nick/Greg video's I made, just in case you wanted to know. So glad you are enjoying this piece too, I love writing the Greg/Nick friendship scenes, not slashy, but I see their friendship on a different level cause I think Greg has always looked up to Nick. So glad you are liking this, and more to come.

CSIxMiss- Thank you so much, to say the best CSI story you have ever read means so much to me, and I'm sure to Kristen too, we put a lot of thought and work into this, and to know so many people are enjoying it, well it just makes it that much better for both of us. Thanks.

Goody- OK, I must admit getting a review from you was a true honor because I have always loved your stories, you know that. I hope you have been able to catch up. I really enjoyed writing Chapter 4, it was probably my favorite, cause I got to write Greg and Nick, angst then fun, and pure Greg magic and that part of Greg that makes him Greg, and why Nick likes him around so much. Yeah, I think these two probably really miss not working together, but that's just me, poor Greg around all those women.

Katknits-Yeah, even Grissom can't let Nick go yet, and it's starting to boil over for Nick, it's getting get a little hotter too, thank for the reviews, it's been great and I loved writing this.

Anmani- Thank you, we have really tried to capture Nick desire to be himself, but trapped sometimes, and the team dealing with their own demons they cannot admit to. I have been trying to write Greg as someone who tries to truly be honest because he's been their, and I don't think Greg could ever not be truthful with Nick.

New creation- Better and better, now that's a compliment. To write a story is one thing, but to keep it interesting and the readers coming back is something else, and even your daughter, Kristen and I couldn't believe that, her first CSI fanfic, we hope we do good by her.

Bebob- Thank you so much for your continuous responses. We truly appreciate them. And big, mean, angry Nick, yeah, damn hot, but it ain't over yet girl, keep reading, that's all I'm saying. I hope you think it gets better, that's what we were striving for, to keep you all coming back for more.

Charxed- We tried to update regularly, we wrote in advance so we were able to update quickly, to keep you all on your toes. Realistic and intense are just what we like hearing, we wanted realistic, and I hope we haven't disappointed.

LucreziaNoin86- Well, we got you hooked to I see, glad to see it, I hope you are enjoying it, as your first CSI fanfic it's a lot to live up to, so I hope it's everything you were hoping for.

NickGilGreggonumber1fan- I was really trying to get Grissom's emotions through in this chapter, in a Grissom way, which can be difficult, but this is as close as I think it gets for him, but it was a step for him none the less, it wasn't Nick that wasn't ready, it was him, and he admitted to himself finally.

Lemon Grass- First off, thank you for your consistent reviews, it means so much to see the same people coming back for more, and you got it, it's not that they don't "trust" Nick, they don't trust themselves to let him go, it's their fear holding them back, and Nick is starting to pay the price. I think his co-workers were very traumatized, in a way Nick could never understand, completely different, but helpless, and they don't want to feel powerless again toward Nick.

Amy- Yeah, I loved that Chapter Kristen wrote, Nick would have loved it, but he didn't see the fear creep up, but he handled it as well as he could, it's Warrick that can't let it go, but you are very perspective in your thinking where Nick's tests are involved.

higherbeingfriendfan- Glad you enjoyed this chapter, Nick can vent to Greg, and Greg has a way of listening, but also maybe getting through to Nick that the others don't because he doesn't pretend with Nick, he admits how scared he was, and maybe that helps Nick too.

Karen- Thank you, it is truly our pleasure to share our story with all of you, that's why we wrote it, we wanted to give our take on Nick and GD, his healing with the help of his friends that we probably, ( ok, we know) we won't get to see on the show, and it was been a wonderful experience writing with Kristen, she is truly the talent behind the fic, and has a gift of writing I can only hope to learn. Greg can open up, and him sharing what he felt with Nick in this chapter, how helpless they all truly felt, I just think Greg could reach Nick in a way the others can't, Greg can be vulnerable, and he can let Nick see that. Thank you for the compliments, it really has been a joy sharing this story with all of you and writing with Kristen.

Jones- We tried to deal with more of the action in the first few chapters, then move on and try to deal with Nick healing, trying to get past this, with the help of his friends, but don't worry, there is still more to come, hope you enjoy. And I wrote most of the Greg parts, so I really wanted to try and get across that maybe Greg understood more than most since he did almost die, not like Nick, by accident, but it did happen, and he suffered as well, treated like glass when he came back, gripped by fear and anxiety, and he could relate to Nick on a level the others couldn't. Plus I believe their friendship runs deep, they have such great chemistry on the show I have really missed this past season.

Groban- Yes they do, not just Nick, that is what they are starting to come to terms with.

KaseyKC- Nick is starting to feel the weight of his friends guilt, but it may get worse before it gets better for all of them. They mean well, they went through hell, which Nick is now starting to realize, he couldn't before, it would seem to real then, didn't want to know. Yes, the team needs healing too and hopefully they soon will realize that also.


	12. Chapter 12

Note:

Sorry to take up space, but I was contacted by someone who has organized a CSIfanfic awards website. I am in no way associated with this, it was suggested that I try to help spread the word. Below is the link to the site. It covers every CSI fandom, every category of story and character. So if you want, go check it out and nominate your favorite stories and authors. The creator told me that trying to reach readers was going to be tough. So let you voice be heard if you wish. Choose for every cat, or just a few. If you don't want to sign up for a LJ account, just read the rules there and send an e-mail to There did my duty, now on to the story.

It looks like fanfic peepswill now allow e-mail or website to show up inside the story. I added the info to my bio page.

* * *

By Shacky

* * *

Nick went back and finished up his work in the alley. It didn't take that much longer, but he couldn't help but feel the 'ghost stare' of Warrick on him for the rest of the time at the scene. Nick found himself searching for that permanent worried look on his coworker's face, but Warrick never came back out to the alley. 

More paranoia.

Nick shook his head. The ride back was quiet, and no words were even spoken about who was driving, Nick still had the keys. He didn't utter a syllable, as he opened up and sat in the driver's seat. He ignored the glaring stare from Warrick from the passenger seat. Nick turned on the radio so he didn't have to sit through the uncomfortable silence the whole way back to the Lab. It wouldn't be soon enough for either one of them.

They both hopped out of the SUV. Nick opened up the back of the vehicle and grabbed his kit and the evidence they had gathered. A lot of blood and prints, but nothing pointed toward any particular suspect or even a motive besides a simple robbery. As Nick closed up his truck, he noticed that Warrick was already halfway to the building.

Nick decided enough was enough. "This ends, now." He muttered under his breath.

Nick took his evidence and stormed his way into the building. "Here," he said leaving the night's finding in the Lab with Hodges. "I need this processed. Not much there, but just blood samples."

Hodges answered back with his usual "Yeah, when I get to it."

Nick marched off to the locker room where he was sure his partner was. Sure enough, Warrick was in the middle of packing up and putting his stuff up for the night.

Nick wasn't waiting for an invitation to start. "Warrick, I can't have you looking over my shoulder all the time. When are you gonna let things go?" Nick half-pleaded, half-ordered. He hoped for a quick talk and conclusion. He didn't like confrontation, especially with his best friend, but he be damned if he would take this anymore.

"When am I gonna let this go?"

Warrick whipped his head around, and by the look in his eyes, Nick was wrong about this being over quick and painless.

"When are you gonna smarten up and pay attention, man? That guy was practically on top of you and you never noticed. Where was your head at, Nicky?"

Warrick's words only served to escalate Nick's already angered mood. "My head was where it always is, Warrick. On the case. Doing my job." Nick's twang was heavier than normal. "Which you seem to have a problem with me doing lately. When are you gonna let me off my leash?"

Voices were being raised, and this was heading towards a bad outcome fast.

"You apparently need a leash, Nick. You weren't even paying attention around you... _again._ Wasn't one time enough, Nick? Or do you like looking for trouble?" Warrick knew he had crossed a line but it was too late to take it back now.

Nick's eyes widen at the accusation. "Screw you." He growled. "I go... looking for trouble? You pull a gun on a poor homeless man tonight just looking for his few meager belongings and I go looking for trouble." Nick was shocked to say the least that Warrick had made such a charge.

"How was I supposed to know that? At least I was looking out for you. Which is something you apparently never learned how to do." Warrick itched closer. "Or I guess it's always just 'bad luck' for you... Right, bro?" Warrick spat back with an intensity in his eyes Nick rarely saw. It was a stare reserved for suspects.

Nick didn't back down though, and stood toe to toe with the taller CSI. "What the hell is that supposed to mean? I get buried in a box and I go looking for trouble?" Nick was stunned. He couldn't believe he was standing here defending himself, his jaw was so tight; he could feel his muscles twitch. "So, what are you saying, Rick? That I can't look out for myself anymore? I can't be trusted to be in the field alone?"

"It's always something isn't it, Nicky? First it was that Hendler woman, you turned your back on a suspect in the house. Got a gun shoved in your face, or did you forget about that? The only thing that saved your ass that night was Grissom's quick thinking to go back and save your butt." Warrick loomed over Nick, he was on a roll, and his lips were off and running before his brain could process what he was saying.

Not even the open mouthed expression on Nick's face could stop him. "Then there was Nigel Crane, you didn't even secure the scene before you walked in that apartment, did you? He pushed you out of a two story Nick, you're damn lucky you just happened to land in the bushes."

Warrick didn't let his posture up; he was going to use size if he had to make his point.

Nick was backed up against his locker.

"Maybe if my partner had been in there with me instead of on the damn phone, then he wouldn't have gotten to me! Huh Warrick? Maybe you're the one with the guilt here." Nick began pointing his finger at his partner's chest. "Maybe you know you should have been in there with me, and maybe that would have never happened if you had been doing your job."

Nick knew he went too far with that when he saw Warrick visibly flinch at his words, but they were true. Warrick should have been in there with him. He damn well didn't go looking for Nigel Crane.

Warrick was now beyond furious. How dare Nick accuse him of being negligent? The Crane thing wasn't his fault, it couldn't have been. Damnit!

Things had gotten loud enough that they had started attracting the attention of a few people out in the hallway. Sara was just about to go walk into the locker room and break this up, but Greg stopped her. "Let me go put an end to this, Greg. They're gonna say something they are going to regret." Sara pleaded with Greg as she tried to get past him.

"Maybe they need to. This has been building between them way too long, just leave them and let them talk it out." Greg was tried to rationalize the argument to Sara.

"If they were talking fine, but they are going to attract the attention of the entire Lab pretty soon." Both Greg and Sara stood back, making sure no one walked into the locker room. They both hoped their two friends could possible work this out tonight. Or get it out of their system.

"Oh, Nigel was my fault now huh? Well, Nick, I would like to think that at least I would have noticed if a complete stranger was living in my home. How long had he been in your attic, Nick?" Warrick allowed an evil chuckle. "You never even noticed." Warrick shook his head. "Not everyone has good intentions in the real world, which so seem to forget. You are a CSI Level 3 Nicky, not some damn rookie, why don't you act like it?"

Nick stared into the whites of Warrick's eyes, because he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Now the psycho living in the attic was my fault also? Was it my fault he killed Jane Galloway? Like I don't feel bad enough about that. So, I went looking for that too. I asked for it, I suppose." Nick's face was turning a very bright shade of red at the yelling match and the intensity of the situation.

He couldn't believe Warrick, of all people, was saying these things to him. "I'm a bad CSI now. All of those things that happened to me were my fault. I went looking for all that trouble you think, huh? Well, then why the hell do you work with me then, Warrick? If I can't be trusted to take care of myself, how can I take care of my 'partner'?"

Nick was beyond furious, being blamed for all of those horrible things. Questioning his ability. His eyes glistened with anger at the man in front of him, but it was past the point of no return. The words had been said, they couldn't be taken back now.

"Someone needs to look after you obviously. You can't even get a girl without screwing that up either. When's the last time you had a woman Nicky, what was her name, Kristi right?"

Nick's eyes lit up with fire at the mention of her name and he balled his hand into a fist at his side.

"Oh shit." Greg muttered, he knew that was the last straw.

"One time in five years you manage to get a woman and look what happens. It almost ends your career, or better yet, gets you locked up in prison for the rest of your life on murder charges. Can you imagine what prison would have been like for you, Nicky? They would have loved you there, for what, a God Damned hooker!"

Warrick didn't even see the fist coming towards him. Nick saw was red, he tried to take care of Kristi, that wasn't his fault. He was trying to save her damnit!

How dare he even... "You son of a bitch!"

He brought his fist up and hit the locker next to Warrick's head so hard he left a dent in the offending piece of metal. Blood on his knuckles, and a look he never thought he would see in his friend's eyes because of him.

Fear.

Nick looked at his partner, then down at his hand, and finally the dent in his locker. He looked in his friends eyes. He was shocked by his own outburst and anger. Nick grabbed his keys and left the locker room, walking by a stunned Greg and several other onlookers.

He got out of the Lab as fast as he could.

tbc...

* * *

Author's notes: 

So we pulled a switch on our readers. Shacky took on Warrick here and I get a chance to tackle someone else on the next. We had fun switching things up.

Shacky20 Notes: I once again want to thank you all very much for your wonderful reviews and fabulous reviews of our story, they really have touched me. I know most of you saw something in this chapter coming to a head, and I hope it lived up to it. When Kristen first had me write this chapter, I didn't think I could, but I hope I captured it well, and lived up to everyone's expectations as most people could see the blow out between Nick and Warrick was coming, I tried very much to show Warrick guilt and Nick's frustration, and I hope I got it right for everyone. I didn't know how well I could do Nick and Warrick scenes, but hopefully it came across well.

Kristen's:

Poncholives:

They have been through so much and it will all come out in the end, you are telepathic.

higherbeingfriendsfan:

Thanks again. You are right both Greg and Warrick are dealing with Nick in their own way, each has a totally different experience and life point of view from what happened.

new creation:

You have been great. No, we don't know anyone, just try to place ourselves each character's heads. I think we watch the show too much, but I'm glad it comes out as real and true.

anmani:

I'm glad you picked up on that line from Warrick, it really does encapsulate how he is feeling.

kasey:

Peace is forthcoming for each of them, but they have to work through their issues. You've picked up on a lot of the undertones.

lemon-grass:

Yes, it is easy to see each point of view. I still think both Warrick and Nick are not being honest with each other, and its coming out at work. Of course one of them is not handling the effects as the other.

bebob-

Happy pills, lol. I'm not sure that would help. Yep, both of them are easy on the eyes.

groban:

I don't know if I could do anymore to Nick, mental break down and torment is a fun think to play with. We are evil.

jewelbaby:

Don't know of anysites. Sorry. But thank you again for everything.

LucreziaNoin86:

You are very sweet, you and your Mom have been great. Its pretty neat to have both of you to read this.

Mma:

Seems from the spoilers I've read the TPTB do plan on dealing with GD for several epps, which is great! Thank you, we worked very hard to try to be realistic, the response has been overwhelming.

Amy:

You are very perspective, in fact Nick is older than Warrick. Yet it seems their roles are reversed. I like to add little nuances to each charter whether its a hobby, mannerism, use of odd phrases and I'm glad that we've been able to present these guys properly. In the past I've always look forward to your thoughts, you're always honest. Thank you.

rozzy:

Hope this last one was a great lead up to the last three chapters. All of you have been great at picking up on the fact that Nick heals, the team still wonders around the walking wounded, a certain CSI in particular.

Katknits:

this is between the guys. It was bound to happen. Thank you so much.

tvspaz:

The whole undertone of the last 5 chapters has been Warrick's inability to let go, to let Nick heal; He's convinced he can protect Nick, his inability to cope with what happened. So, Nick is stuck working with him.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13 By Kristen

* * *

When Nick entered his townhouse, he couldn't even recall how he got to his door. He swallowed hard, wondering how fast he must have driven, and thought ruefully how close he might have gotten into an accident. His chest was heaving, he still hadn't managed to get his harsh breathing under control since the outburst.

Nick stood in the middle of his living room, his ears filled with the pounding of his heart. He felt another light sweat break across his forehead, and wiped the perspiration away with the sleeve of his arm. Nick started pacing up and down in the confines of the room, kicking at any piece of furniture in the way of his furious stride.

His hand hurt from when he smashed it into the locker. That little flashback playing over and over again in his head, like it was caught in some odd freeze frame action. All the words exchanged echoed in his head. Nick couldn't calm down. Instead, his fiery temper escalated as he thought back to all the accusations from his best friend.

His cell phone kept ringing, and Nick ignored the pesky shrill-like noise that told him that probably more than one person was looking for him. He pulled the offending device out of his pocket, saw the message that read 5 missed calls. He studied the readout, when he noticed his hand tremble.

Nick looked at his left hand dumbly to see it shaking as well. He inhaled a deep, breath.

'No, no, no, no, no,' his mind screamed.

Except his internal mantra of denial was being out done by all the hate filled words of his partner. His brain was buzzing on overload.

The cell phone beeped again and Nick slung the thing across the room where he heard is crack from the impact.

Nick held his head in his hands, trying to will all the noise in his head to go away. When he wiped his hand across his face, he noticed that it came away moist.

"No, no, please stop it." He half choked to no one.

Nick headed for the medicine cabinet in his bedroom. He knocked over bottles till he found the one he was searching for. He tapped one out, and swallowed it dry. He hadn't felt the need for any of his meds in weeks. With shaky legs, Nick managed to drag himself to his couch, where he collapsed, almost exhausted. Nick felt the floodgates reach their breaking point. He looked up from his sofa and noticed the light of one of his lamps. Still reeling from his uncorked rage, he grabbed the lamp with shaky hands and hurled it off the end table.

His living room, was engulfed in darkness and Nick was left utterly alone with the sounds of his uncontrolled sobbing filling the room.

Greg Sanders stood outside Nick Stoke's door for a few minutes. His hand wavered for several moments before he pulled it back. The other criminalist wasn't answering his phone and it took every ounce of determination to keep everyone else at bay at the lab. His coworkers would be expecting some sort of progress report, but the newest criminalist had warned not to expect an immediate phone call. This might take some time.

Knowing a lot of people's worry and concern, including his own, was weighing heavily on his mind. He forced himself to knock hard enough for Nick to answer. Greg stood there for a while, and put all his weight on his tip toes, then back again to the balls of his feet. He wasn't going to be ignored, so he just banged harder.

Finally, the door cracked open. Greg could see Nick study him for a moment, till the other man stepped away, a gesture that the ex-lab tech knew was his invitation to enter.

Greg walked into the foyer area, as Nick shuffled his way back into his living room and slumped down on his sofa. Greg noticed the dimness of streetlights filter in from one of the windows in the dining room. It was the only source of illumination.

Nick's expression was hidden behind weird bands of shadow and light. Greg stood silently as Nick took a sip of beer. The younger man studied the two other empty Heinekens on the coffee table. Greg took in the small destruction of the room and sighed inwardly.

He took a set in a love seat next to the sullen man, and waited for him to speak. Greg sat there for quite some time, his inner voice telling him he might be here all night, till a harsh voice interrupted.

"Who sent ya?"

Greg adjusted his weight a little. Who didn't, he wondered. "I wanted to come."

Nick seemed to mull over his answer. The CSI drank some more of his beverage. "Who knows?"

Greg wondered where honesty would get him right now. He'd never lied to his friend before. "Most of the graveyard shift."

Greg heard a grunt and Nick finished off his beer and tossed it on to the coffee table where it rolled to a stop next to the others. "Am I suspended?"

"Not that I know of." Greg answered. The truth was, his superiors were just worried, not a very new concept when it came to their subject.

"What, no report has been filed?" Nick asked, his voice a shell of his old self.

"Warrick didn't want to talk about it." Greg explained. "Can't have a report, when there's no documentation of any action."

Nick slid his elbow onto his lap, and placed his head wearily against his hand. "I'm fine, Greg," Nick said.

Greg arched an eyebrow. "You know mixing meds and alcohol is never a good combination."

Nick looked up somewhat surprised.

"I know you can pound away more than a six pack. I count only three bottles and with your slightly slurred speech, its easy to pick up."

Nick actually cracked a grin. "You're going to be a top CSI in a few years, Greg." Nick's voice was nothing if not sincere.

The younger man didn't say anything. He would let his friend lead the conversation.

Nick shook his head. "You know what the damnedest thing of it all is?"

Greg leaned closer. "No."

"I was scared in that alleyway. When that homeless guy first came over, my hand was itchy over my gun. It...it was intense."

Nick folded his arms on his lap, and sat forward. "I was very vigilant the whole time...yet.." Nick's voice trailed off.

"It could have happened to anybody," Greg tried to offer.

He didn't expect Nick to burst out into laughter.

After the near hysterics were done, Nick quieted down and looked in the Greg's eyes. "I'm not loosing it, Greggo. All of you guys are driving me up a wall. I've been doing fine. I can't be expected to recover when all of you keep walking on eggshells waiting for me to crack."

"We're not waiting for you to slip up." Greg defended.

"In fact, I'd say all of you are the ones pushing me to a breakdown. Maybe if I do fall, then maybe you can justify all of your over bearingness." Nick continued, ignoring Greg's response.

Greg didn't like being ignored. He grabbed Nick's shoulder and forced the other man to look at him. "What's the worst thing about it?"

Nick looked at him in confusion. '"What?"

"All of this supposed over protectiveness. What's so bad about it?"

Nick blinked a few times. "I don't need it."

"Why?" Greg pressed.

"Its not necessary. I'm fine. I'm not cationic. I'm not stuck in some Plexiglas box anymore. I've been out. I'm still me." Nick locked eyes with his friend. "I don't want to be treated like some victim anymore."

"We don't treat you like one, Nick. What is it really?" Greg continued.

Nick growled low in his throat. "I just want to be normal again. In control of my own life."

"You hate it when you feel like you don't have any control?"

Nick snorted. "No one likes being treated this way. You guys keep trying to run my life. I can't stand it."

Greg licked his lips. "I know all about it, Nick. We all do." Upon Nick's continued confused expression Greg went on. "Walter Gordon's plan was all about control. Every part of his scheme was about cold-blooded revenge. To be in command."

Nick swallowed. Greg could tell he didn't like this subject but it didn't matter. "He just didn't want to kill you Nick, or any other CSI who happened to come along his well thought of trap. Walter Gordon was a scientist. A man who crafted every aspect of his great experiment, having planed and anticipated everything."

Greg's voice was as serious as Nick had ever heard.

"He wanted us to suffer. The Lab. Your coworkers. We had no control what so ever. We were useless. Felt useless."

"I know." Nick responded.

"No, you don't." Greg shook his head. "We talked about this at the Lake, but I think in a weird sort of way, you only now are able to understand even the slightest what we went through."

Nick played with the fabric of his jeans as he listened.

"If you hate how we make you feel, that we're keeping you from going back to your life. Just try to keep in mind what all of us went though as well. Warrick may have been out of line tonight, and he might be a bit overbearing. But all he's trying to do is retain some of the control that was taken away from all of us that night."

Greg took a deep breath. "We're just floundering away. Give us a chance. Let us try to get our control back from the asshole who ripped it from us."

Greg rubbed his face with his hand. "We all have issues dude, from that night. I stopped counting the nightmares, and I'm sure Warrick's is probably worse. That guy was really messed the whole time. It tore him up, being forced to watch ...to watch you."

Nick looked away for a moment. "I guess...I just... didn't really think about it...like that."

Greg noticed Nick's fingers tremble slightly. The other man caught him staring. "Its nothing."

"Its...uh, not really any of my business, but have you told your doctor about any of this?"

"About what?"

"Everything we've talked about."

Nick scrunched up his face in annoyance. "We talk about the box. After the box."

"I think we've discovered tonight, that there's more to what's going on then just the time you spent in there." Greg eyes' darted down to Nick's hands.

The Texan looked like he was about to launch into another argument. Greg held out his hand. "I'm not an expert, dude. I'm not telling you want to do, but even I can recognize signs of PTSD. If you don't share with your therapist everything that's going on in that head of yours, then things are never going to get better."

Both men sat in silence. Greg knew he didn't need to say anything else. The two men talked about work a little more. The younger criminalist let himself out, when it was obvious his friend was worn out. Greg got in his car and began the task of calling a very long list of people.

For the first time in weeks, Greg felt that Nick was finally taking the last steps to really get past his nightmare.

* * *

It was Nick's night off. He slept all evening and into the day. He made an emergency appointment with his therapist and spent two hours at the man's office letting him know some of the things that had been bothering him for the past few weeks. It was agreed to increase the visits to twice a week, and Nick promised to be open about everything from now on. His doctor explained that his increased anger and paranoia were signs of his developing problems from not dealing with the aftermath of the kidnapping openly.

The criminalist was standing outside enjoying the fresh air at the park. He had checked his voice mail and was relieved to hear a response from his earlier phone call. He looked up at the stars and in the serene beauty of the night sky. He heard a car door close, and the foot steps of another man approach.

Warrick Brown strolled onto the court, wearing a T-shirt with the sleeves cut off, and a pair of black sweat pants. Nick had on a pair of blue ones, his Dallas Cowboys shirt a proud symbol of how he felt tonight.

Warrick looked at him with a mixture of fierce emotions. Nick could feel the static electricity in the air. He bounced the basketball a few times and then threw it at his partner.

"You ready?" Nick taunted.

Warrick Brown bounced the ball in one hand, his eyes never looked away.

"Show me what'cha got."

Tbc...

Yep, B-Ball action. I promise.

* * *

Kristen's notes: After Shacky's last chapter, I hope people were not too disapointed in this one. My turn at Greg, plus some much needed realizations and reactions from poor Nick.

The Mod at CSIfanficawards would like me to post her info on the last chapters of this story. She's still trying to get word out to alfafic readers from this site. So, again just posting the info for her.Below is the link to the site. It covers every CSI fandom, every category of story and character. So if you want, go check it out and nominate your favorite stories and authors. The creator told me that trying to reach readers was going to be tough. So let you voice be heard if you wish. Choose for every cat, or just a few. If you don't want to sign up for a LJ account, just read the rules there and send an e-mail to. There did my duty. I put the links in (dot) so that .would show up. And I typed (at) for

(www)livejournal(at)com/community/csifanficawards/

csifanficawards(at)yahoo(dot)com

Shacky's notes:

Poncholives- Thanks for the kudos, to say I was unsure about writing this chapter would be an understatement, but once it starting flowing it just kept coming and I could envision it in my head and could so see both of them blowing their tops, it had to happen I think.

Designation- Intense it what I was going for,wanted to catch a few of you off guard, but I could so see Nick finally having had enough, and Warrick not giving in, but taking his guilt out on Nick himself.

NIckGilGreggonumber1fan- Yeah, but Warrick was so worked up, I don't think he knew what he was saying, we has just angry, and we all say things we don't mean when we are angry. But his guilt is consuming him.

CSIxMiss- Speechless is always a good thing authors like to hear, it means our writing worked, and came across well. I didn't think I'd be able to pull off a good Warrick/Nick scene, but it seems to have done the trick.

Jewelbaby- We'll wait and see what Greg does, and I've loved writing the Nick/Greg chapters, but trying something new. Love your new story at as well.

Overchay- So, the whole think at once. Well, I am a Nick/Greg slash writer, if you couldn't tell. I had most of the Nick/Greg scenes, and tried to mix things up a little with this chapter. I love Nick/Greg, and have several stories of my own on my own Live Journal site, under Shacky20 as well if you are interested. So glad you are enjoying this story as well..

Rozzy07- That's the feeling I wanted you to have, mentally exhausted. I know, but I truly Warrick wasn't thinking, his mouth was just moving before his brain could engage, he had a lot of guilt and rage to let go of also, and Nick and Warrick were in each other's path at the time.

Mma63- Well, the surprises are what keep you coming back, we strive for the unexpected, and I think we achieved that. At least I hoped.

MBsinger- Are you new, forgive me but I haven't seen your name before, I love still attracting new readers. The confrontation needed to happen for both of them, get it out of their systems, but they won't let it last long.

KatKnits00- Thank you so much for your continued reviews, they really mean a lot to me since I was kind of the unknown when Kristen asked me to write with her. It truly has been a privilege writing this story, and I hate it's starting to come to an end. Yeah, I think Warrick knew he crossed the line, but it was way beyond too late to take it back, and Nick needed to let go.

tvspaz626- So glad you enjoyed this last chapter. As I said before, I wasn't sure if I could pull it off as well as Kristen, and the reviews you all have given me for it has been heartwarming to say the least. Don't worry, we update, quick, last chapter will be updated Sunday, so you wont' miss anything.

everybetty- Yeah, both are pretty pig headed, thinks that's where all of this stared from. Thanks for taking the time to review and glad you are enjoying the story.

LucreziaNoin86- Well, I guess that's good, expecting the unexpected means we are doing are jobs right.

Ninjahurt- You could feel the conflict between Warrick and Nick building, it was boud it come to and head somtime.

FrodoJijactess- So glad you liked this chapter, it was hard yet easy to write, hard to imagine, but once it got going, it flowed right out.

KASEY(KC- I'm so glad you thought is was necessary. I could feel it building of several chapter s now, and knew it was coming to a head, hope I portrayed it as believable and needed.

rojaji- Thank you, I was so afraid to tackle Warrick, but I could feel the guilt radiating off of him, and knew he was going to explode at some point, and Nick and him needed this out of their systems I believed.

csifan- Intensity was the key word I was going for, and you won't be waiting long.

New Creation- As much as we would love to keep it going, all good things must come to an end, and we want to end on a high note. Thank you so much for you continued support of our fic and great reviews, the all mean a lot to us, and are very thankful for your continued supportl

lemongrass- Edge of your seat is good, that was exactly what I was going for. Glad it worked for you. And your review was one of the best compliments we could have asked for, and always still free

Jones- Glad you liked the action, I tried to capture it the best I could.

Bebob- Yeah, I wouldn't want to get Nick mad either

higherbeigfriendsfan- Glad you were shocked, wouldn't be as much fun if is was predictable.

groban- Wasn't trying to be evil, I promise, but cliffhangers are good when are you are writing it. You won't have to wait long, and thank you for you consistent reviews and praise, it means so much to both of us. I really didn't know I had it in me, I guess Kristen is rubbing off on me

Amy- Thank you, they both have some healing to do, I believe Warrick can't let go of Nick for his hear of seeing him almost die, twice plus the guilt of knowing it could have been him. They are bound to have words, it was building, glad you are enjoying it.


	14. Chapter 14

**Conclusion written by : Kristen and Shacky**

* * *

Warrick knew he had the height over the other man, and charged down the court towards the basket, with the intent of throwing the ball over Nick's head. Just as Warrick sprinted ahead, Nick jumped, and knocked the ball out of the other man's hand with his finger tips. Then he lightly jabbed his shoulder against Warrick's chest. Knocking him out of the way.

Seconds later, Nick did a 180 degree turn, and tossed the ball into the basket, and rushed to catch the bouncing item.  
Warrick caught up to the other man in two quick strides and slammed his hands down on the ball, knocking it out of Nick's hands, and scooping it up. He then dunked it in, and caught it again.

Nick came bounding over and the two traded quick foot work as Warrick dribbled the ball around, changing which hands held onto it. Nick kept his eye on the object. He stepped in and out of the other man's personal space, and kept the other CSI from taking another shot.

The two men danced around the court, Warrick twirling around, as Nick came up to rush him. The Texan was rewarded with a few shoves from the taller criminalist. A shoulder blade connected with his side a few times.

Still both CSIs eyed each other like two rams ready to lock horns.

"You worked...everything...out?'" Warrick rasped in between heavy breaths.

Nick snapped up the ball as it descended down to the ground. He went towards the goal. Warrick raced after him. He knocked the ball out of the criminalist's grip and his elbow glanced the side of Nick's head.

Warrick made a second quick dunk, but Nick was on top of him, his hands pushing his partner aside. Then as the other CSI jumped, his forearm caught Warrick right on his chin.

"Yeah." Nick said breathing hard. "I'm going to let...go..of my anger." Now he dribbled, moving backwards. "If you ...stop ...doggin' me."

Warrick guarded his partner, not letting him advance up the court. "Did you develop...the ability ..to predict..when bad things are...gonna happen?"

Nick switched hands, the noise of the ball echoing on the ground. "Nope."

Then the shorter man, swerved to his left, brushing past the larger guy. Warrick lunged forward nearly knocking Nick over from behind.  
Nick lost control of the ball, which Warrick quickly grabbed, making another shot. He snagged the ball one handed, then swirled around, and went down the court again.

"I'm not...going to stop..watching your back." Warrick slapped the object around on the surface, slowing down the pace.

Nick stayed low, waiting for the other man to make his pass. He remained nimble, his hands outward, waiting to tackle the ball.

Then he made his move, and Warrick made a beeline for the net, not waiting for his partner to get out of the way.

Nick stood his ground, acting like a defensive end in football. He tackled the approaching man. Warrick tried to barrel past him, and tripped on his way down to the ground.

Nick felt the weight slam into him, and he fell on top of the other man. Then he quickly rolled over and laid flat on his back.

Both men didn't move, each sprawled out on the court. Ragged in take of breaths, thunderous and rough in the air.

"I'll...stop..crowding...you." Warrick said, couching slightly.

Nick sucked in the clean, crisp air. "Our work...is sometimes, dangerous...man." Nick sat up, and planted one hand to the ground. He looked over at his partner. "Its part of the job."

Warrick pulled himself into a sitting position. "I know." The larger man wiped away some of the sweat trickling down his face. His T-shirt clung to him. "When you can push away all the images from inside that box. Then I'll be able to forget about that what I saw from the live feed."

Nick understood all the meaning behind that statement. He nodded. "The locker room---"

Warrick grunted. "Two hot heads, pushing each other's buttons." He looked up at him. "I'm sorry for some of the things I said, man." Warrick shook his head. "I didn't mean them."

Nick sighed. "Did you think...I mean, some of those ideas were in your head. Must have been thinking about them for a while."

The other ciminalist looked up to the sky and back to his parnter. "When you're tight with people, you say things that will get a reaction. Stuff that hurts." Warrick fixed Nick was a sincere look. "Kind of like how familes say the harshest shit to each other. Heat of the moment. I trust you, man. You're one of the best CSIs out there. I just ...we're brothers and its hard to let go what happened to my boy."

Nick felt relief. He didn't want to drag all of that out again. "I'm." Nick shook his head. "I've been messed up." He shrugged at Warrick's expression. "I know you know that. I...I've worked out most of it. But, I didn't exactly tell my shrink everything that's been in my head lately."

Warrick looked down at the ground. "I've haven't been exactly candid with mine."

Nick gave him another confused expression.

His partner just chuckled. "It was mandatory, man. However, I really didn't stick around for all the appointments he wanted me to go for. Only did the required three."

"Oh." Nick said simply.

Warrick peered down at the ground. "I keep having these...these dreams." He sighed. "Sometimes you shot yourself right when I open the lid...sometimes, we're just too late."

Nick swallowed hard, listening to his partner, at his difficulty to keep his voice even. Nick stared at the same vacant spot on the asphalt.

Warrick shook his head. "I've woken up screaming when I thought I was inside that thing." Warrick looked up. "I've had a hard time dealing with this shit, man. I'm...I'll be all right though. I'm going to go back to the doctor. I'm gonna try being honest with him."

Nick nodded quietly.

Warrick let out a small laugh. "How about we just stick to talking to each other, when shit comes up. And then take it from there."

Nick was nodding a bit more animatedly. "Yeah, that's cool."

That earned a smile from his partner. "Cool. I wouldn't want to continue to kick your ass in B-Ball just to have us talk about this stuff."

Nick laughed. "You're lucky I bruised up my hand."

"Yeah, right. Excuses." Warrick shook his head. "I'm surprised you could play at all, after trying to destroy my locker."

Nick looked chagrined. "Yeah, well, I almost kept myself out of the field again. But after some ice, its fine."

"You sure?" Warrick asked, about to inspect the hand that had some nice swelling around it.

Nick was about to stop his parnter from inspecting it, when he saw the glint in the other man's eye.

The Texan burst out laughing. "I almost fell for that."

Warrick grinned. "Yeah, you did."

Both criminalists sat there, enjoying the night breeze.

Warrick knew it was time to get going. "I'll see you at start of shift tomorrow?"

"Yeah." Nick answered. The Texan held his hand out in a fist. Both men gave each other their patented ghetto low five.

Nick helped his partner up, and each headed towards their respected cars. Before Nick got in his, he turned to his partner. "Next time, its baseball dude, so I can give you a proper ass whopping."

Warrick just snorted and rolled his eyes. "Keep telling yourself that man. I'll wipe the field with you in that as well."

* * *

It has been three days since Warrick and Nick had their 'talk' as they liked to call it, but it seemed to have helped. They both had come to several realizations since that day. Maybe that both of them hadn't been as honest and as they should have been to each other, and maybe to themselves. 

Especially Nick. He had a lot of work to do, but he had to be honest to himself and his team before he could begin that. But he wanted it back: his work, his respect, his control, and his life. He felt like he lost it all that night, and he never felt like he regained it. Maybe now he could really go on.

It was the first celebration since they had all returned to night shift. This time it was for Grissom's birthday, so they all gathered a little before shift to have their party, whether Gil Grissom had wanted them to or not. And now was as good as time as any Nick figured to himself.

Nick stood there with everyone else, including Jim Brass, and had something to say. He figured now was as good as time as any. He cleared his throat and moved to the middle of the room.

Everyone stopped what they were doing to look up at Nick, curious as to what the man would say after getting everyone's attention.

"Hey guys, I uh, I just wanted to first of all say thanks to you for putting up with me since I got back. I know I haven't been the easiest person to get along with, but I hope to change that. "

Catherine spoke up first. "Nicky, you're family, we aren't putting up with you. You've had a rough few months, we understand that. We didn't expect for you to be come through all of that unscathed."

Everyone was now gathering a little closer to Nick, when he spoke up again. "Yeah, but I did. And maybe I wasn't as okay, as I was saying I was. I never realized I don't think, what you guys must have gone through, to find me. I never let myself, because then I would have had to... uh... maybe think about it."

Nick looked down at the floor and back up to the group. You didn't. "Maybe if I was honest about this a couple months ago, I could have saved us all some grief. But I needed to try it my way." Nick shrugged. "I had to realize for myself it wasn't working. But I want it to work better now, and thatmeans being more honest with you guys, and my therapist, and myself especially."

"Trust me Nick, it wouldn't have team without you. We got it all back now." Grissom said.

"Thanks Gris, and no one is happier to be back, no offense Cath, but I've missed all of you guys, and nights are so much more interesting, and crazy. And I still have Warrick with me. What else could a guy want?" He said with a grin and a laugh and everyone joined in for once, maybe since that horrible night last May. But he would try harder now to put that behind him, and so would they. Because the family he found here was back together again, where they all belonged.

"Admit it Stokes, you just missed me, and of course who wouldn't. I mean I am the life of the shift, plus you needed someone to kick your ass at PS2 again." Greg of course chimed in with a smirk and went and stood by his best friend again. Nick didn't know what he would have done without Greg sometimes, he did try to understand, but he was still the same old Lab Rat that was good for a laugh when he let himself be.

"Excuse me rookie. Who got who's ass kicked at Madden 2005? Yeah, that's what I thought thank you very much, Spike." Nick ran his hair once again through Greg's shorter spikes that were back.

"Hey, don't mess with the hair man, I just got in fixed."

Nick liked to think he had a little part of Greg going back to the shorter look, but he knew the CSI would never admit it, so he left it alone.

"Okay people, more punch and a toast." Sara poured everyone's cup full.

"To Grissom. Happy Birthday to the best Supervisor any CSI could hope for, and for us all being back together again. " Sara smiled her brilliant grin that she saved for special occasions.

"And to Nick, for having you back where you belong, for having you here, and for all of us being back on one team. To the Team!"

Everyone raised their glasses in cheers "To the team!", they shouted back in response. Then they all talked between themselves for a little while before assignments.  
Gris and Catherine stood back in the corner, watching their four CSI's talk and laugh, just like they used to.

"It is good being back together again I must admit." Catherine spoke to Gil in hushed tones. "Even if I have to share the supervisor's spot with you."

"Hey, more people to share the paperwork with. I see it as a great advantage. I'm just glad to have everyone here, it wouldn't be complete without, Nick." He spoke as serious as he could, because he knew they would never have been the same again, none of them.

"No, it wouldn't, and now maybe we can all start to work past our problems with Nick, and that means you too, Gil." Catherine knew Grissom still had problems letting his charge do his job the way he needed to. Catherine couldn't say she didn't understand, cause she felt overprotective of Nicky, too. But like Nick said, they all needed to be honest and move on.

"Yeah, I just can't imagine what would have..."

"Then don't Gil, cause we didn't. We have the best damn CSI's any supervisor could ask for. Happy Birthday Gil." And Catherine leaned over to give Grissom a small kiss on the cheek, and he actually smiled for the first time in a while. Besides he hated birthdays.

"I hate to interrupt your moment here you two," Brass walked up to them and got an eyebrow raise from both of them, "but we have jobs for the night it looks like." Brass went about telling Catherine and Grissom about the calls they received for the team.

Greg and Sara were eating their cake while watching Nick and Warrick talk it up in the corner. The two partners were talking about sports they assumed because they were very animated with their hands and laughing.

" I guess it didn't come to blows," Sara whispered. "I don't see any black eyes or swollen jaw bones. I just hope they worked it out."

"I think they have, in their guy way." Greg grinned as he said it, he knew how Sara hated that. "Some things women just don't understand, guys don't 'talk', they work it out however they need too. I think Nick and Warrick had just the talk they needed to."

Greg looked genuinely happy as he watched his friends again. Yeah, he thought, things were going to be just fine. Now that Nick had admitted his difficulties out loud. Maybe the Texan never did let himself think about what the team went through. Maybe what the younger CSI said the other day in Nick's house had gotten through.

"Guys, party's over, we still have work to do." Grissom bellowed over the top of everyone talking. "Sara and Cath, you two have a DB over at the Bellagio. Looks like you guys may be there awhile from the sounds of things. Here you go." Gris handed over the assignment to Cath and the two women started discussing the particulars together.

"I have a hit and run over in the South side of town, jogger took on a car and lost. So, I'll be heading over there."

And for your three, I have something extra special. Las Vegas Airport, someone tried to hide a body by shoving it into a suitcase. It's been several places by now. Luggage handlers started to smell the suitcase needless to say knew it wasn't lost luggage. The stench made several workers sick, so they haven't touched it yet, but needless to say, it's dripping." Grissom said like it was nothing unusual.

"Oh no, I'm not going there again." Nick remembered back to his last bad decomp. He stunk for days.

"A suitcase, cool. I mean. I haven't seen anything like that before. I haven't done a real decomp, yet." Greg seemed almost excited about the assignment.  
"Good, because you are going to do this one, Greg. Everyone needs to learn sometime. Nick and Warrick are going to supervise you on this one, while you, uh, learn the ropes of a decomp." Gil explained a tiny glint in his eye.

Nick and Warrick started chuckling because the young CSI had to idea what he was in store for.

"Really, I get to work with the guys tonight, this will be so cool." Nick was correct, Greg was bouncing with excitement, poor guy didn't have a clue Nick amused to himself.

"Yep G, looks like you're coming with us tonight" Nick said with a laugh.

"Oh Yeah, and it's all yours, Nick and I just get you supervise, you're very first decomp, Greg." Warrick grinned, and somewhere in the background, they though they heard Sara actually giggling.

Nick and Warrick gave each other a knowing smile, each man could barely keep themselves from bursting out into laughter.

"What? I've done something kind of like that, right? No problem, let's go guys" Greg grabbed his kit with the energy and excitement of his first case, like he always did.

Nick and Warrick elbowed each other good naturally.

"What? Am I not getting something here, it's just a decomp, right?" Greg questioned.

"Come on Greggo, you'll learn something new tonight bud." Nick turned him by the shoulders and lead him out the door. They looked behind to see, Grissom, Catherine, and Sara laughing.

"Lemons Greg, lemons!" Sara shouted at the retreating men.

"Uh Nick, why is Sara laughing at me and shouting lemons?" Now he was looking slightly nervous.

"Just consider it a learning experience G, come one." Nick grabbed his kit and followed the duo into the parking lot.

"Here bro, this time you drive." Warrick offered up the keys to the SUV.

Nick looked up at Warrick, knowing what the real message was there. He could see it behind his friend's eyes.

"Thanks, man. Question is what are we gonna do with, G on the way home?" And they laughed again.

"Wait, what do you mean, come on guys, this isn't funny anymore. What do you mean what are you gonna do with me? Hey wait up!" Greg walked a little faster to catch up with his new coworkers, wondering just what they had in store for him tonight.

He knew it would probably include him smelling bad, and lemons after it was done. But if it meant he could see his friends this happy and relaxed again, he'd do it. It almost felt like an initiation somehow to the youngest CSI. Yeah, the team was finally together again.

"You coming, G?" Nick shouted from behind the wheel.

"On my way guys, and I'm assuming I'm sitting in the back" He really didn't have to ask.

Nick and Warrick gave each other a knowing look, "Oh Hell yes!" They both shouted.

Greg climbed in the three drove off on their first ever assignment together.

* * *

The End 

Notes: Shacky and I want to thank everyone for reading and supporting this story. I had never written anything with another author before, and it was a rewarding experience. Shacky and I worked a long time this and we learned a lot. The response to this story was very overwhelming, all the old and some new faces who came along to enjoy the ride. We wrote the conclusion together as a fitting ending to our co-written efforts.

There are tons of "Grave Danger" fics out there, each one taking on new angles, other possibilities, and exploring many avenues. I'm glad people enjoyed our take on a Nick in denial, but working his way though things with the help of his friends. We really wanted to focus on Greg and Warrick, their totally different reactions to the trauma, and therefore; their different approaches to dealing and healing.

Thank you very much from both of us. It was a pleasure to see this now complete. I know Shacky will continue with her Live Journal entries and some adventures on this site. I'm working on a new, lengthy, angsty casefile, that will see the light of day I hope sometime soon.

Take care-  
Kristen and Shacky


End file.
